Скачать книгу

all the way home, and returned to such an enormous credit card bill that they had to increase the taxes, which caused all the people of Magherafelt to revolt (and the people of Magherafelt can be really revolting). And so the princesses were expelled to live in a caravan on the windswept land of woe and despair that is called Ballywalter.

      Oh, hang on a minute..... Did I say that no one lived happily ever after? I forgot to tell you that Mrs Ted and Mr Cuddles eloped to live on a little pink boat, which they happily sailed from island to little island in the peaceful waters of Strangford Lough, and they lived very happily ever after, (yes, even after Mr Cuddle’s ten year warranty had expired).

image26.png

      The Spooky Forest by Bowen

      Once upon a time there was a little boy called Sam who said to his mummy, "Can I go in to that forest over there."

      His mum said No, but Sam thought she said Yes.

      Sam ran into the forest. His mum shouted "No No No!" but Sam still didn't hear her.

      Then Sam realised that he couldn't get out of the forest, "Oh no!" cried Sam, “What have I done?”

      Sam couldn't get out because there was a force field around the forest. Sam heard his mum crying, "No, no, no.”

      Sam had a wee walk around the forest and he heard a tree talking, the tree was a nasty tree, so he hid behind another tree. And then he realised that all the trees where nasty.

      Suddenly a boy appeared, he was a good boy, and Sam could tell that he was a good boy because he had cleaned his teeth and brushed his hair.

      The good boy was called Niall. Niall had super-powers so that he could do anything. Niall gave Sam half of his super-powers, and kept the other half for himself.

      Niall told Sam that there were more super-powers in the forest, and if Sam could help him find the super-powers then they would both be really super-duper.

      Niall said, “If we can find the forest dragon then we can take his super-powers, and then we can make all the nasty stuff be dead, and then you can get home, and the forest will turn in to a zoo.”

      “Oh!” Sam said, "When I grow up I want to be a zoo keeper, so that would be very nice.”

      Niall said, “I live in this forest, and the force field won't let me out.” Niall gave Sam a magic wand, because he forgot to give him it earlier. Niall told Sam to wave the wand and say “Magic, magic”, and then make a wish.

      So Sam said, “Magic, magic: turn that tree in to a tent.”

      “Oh? Why didn’t I think of that?” Said Niall.

      That night Sam could hear something and Niall could hear something. At the same time they sneaked out very quietly, but before they got out they both knew it was the dragon.

      The dragon had the last super-power that Sam and Niall were searching for, so they would have to kill the dragon to get the super-power.

      Sam waved his wand and said, “Magic, magic: give Sam and Niall an invisible force field.”

      “Oh. That’s a good idea,” said Niall, “I wish I’d thought of that because I always had to hide in a stinky cave.”

      Sam said, "When is it morning it will be better because I can't see that much because it’s dark, and I'm tired anyway."

      That night Sam had a good idea. When he woke up, Sam said, “Magic, magic: make the dragon dead.”

      The dragon died.

      Niall said, “Oh! I wish I’d thought of that.”

      So the dragon was gone, and the spooky forest turned into a lovely zoo, and Sam became the zoo-keeper.

      But all the super-powers that Sam had were all used up by turning the forest into the zoo, so Sam wasn’t super anymore.

      “Oh No!” cried Sam, “I don’t have any super-powers, and there is a thief coming who might steal something.”

      The thief was very old, and Niall said he could catch him easy-peasy.

      But the thief had a time machine that he had stolen from the t.v. show, so Niall phoned the police and said, “There’s a thief, and he is out and about.”

      But the policeman said, “I’m sorry, I can’t help you because I just got early retirement.”

      So Sam and Niall phoned up the army. Sam said to the army man, “Shoot his time machine because the thief is using it to cheat on the National Lottery by remembering the winning numbers and going back in time to buy his tickets.”

      So the army man shot the time machine and it exploded, and the thief ran away.

      Sam said to Niall, “I’ll use the magic wand to give us a safety dog to keep the thief away.”

      And Niall said, “Why didn’t I think of that earlier? I wish I could think clever thoughts like what you do.”

      Sam said, “It’s no wonder you’re so silly, you should go to school. Where have you been?”

      “I had a date with your girlfriend. And we went to the cinema to see TinTin.” said Niall.

      “Oh, I’m really jealous.” said Sam. They were going to have a fight but a giant robot came along, tripped over an ice-cream van and fell into the sea.

      Sam forgot about punching Niall on his nose, and they both went to look at the beach where the giant had fallen over.

      Niall got to the beach first, but Sam shouted, “Don’t go on the beach, the robot has made it bad, and it will swallow you up.”

      Niall shouted back, “No.”

      Sam shouted, “Why?”

      Niall said, “Because I can run faster than you, so the beach will swallow you up instead.”

      Sam could feel some of his super-powers coming back to him, so he waved his magic wand one more time, and said, “Magic, magic: turn the busted robot into a monster truck.”

      Sam jumped into the monster truck and let Niall get in too. And they both zoomed back to the zoo before the tide came in.

      Niall said, “I’m sorry for taking your girlfriend to the cinema.”

      Sam said, “That’s alright, she was a minger anyway, and she ate all my popcorn”

      “Let’s put her in the zoo.” said Niall.

      “Good idea,” said Sam.

      But when they got back to the zoo, the thief came and stole the monster truck and then drove away to China with Sam’s girlfriend.

      “Byeeee” said Niall and Sam.

      And they all lived happily ever after.

image27.png

      T’was a Night Like Any Other by Blair

      T'was a night like any other

      Two thousand years ago,

      There wasn't any Santa,

      Nor reindeer, elves or snow.

      The people weren't excited

      Nor expecting any gifts.

      They went to bed quite early

      Except those on night shifts.

      They were men like any other,

      The lowest of the low,

      Who stood upon the hilltop

      With the city down below.

      Another

Скачать книгу