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      Children of alcoholics are a topic of a whole other book. I do recommend to the readers with a similar childhood story to read R. Norwood20, E. McAvoy and S. Israelson21 and others. The process of healing in this case is the process of finding oneself, and the books mentioned above extensively instruct one on how to do that. It is worth mentioning that it is hard, but necessary for the women to know the truth: in their case healing is not a single session, it’s their life’s job. Their goal is not to make the pain go away, but to learn how to live with it – this is what healing means for them.

      I would still like to share an interesting observation. I worked with Nastya nearly ten years ago, when the internet just began to enter our lives. All these years the protocol of her session was in my computer. When I began writing the commentary for her session, I googled my client’s diagnosis and read the following: “Polycystic ovaries is a rare medical condition, according to different sources of information, from 4 to 8 per cent of women have it, beginning form adolescent years). However, it is serious as it causes infertility. The ultrasound scan shows that a woman’s ovary looks as if it is ‘stuffed’ with many bubbles 8—10mm in diameter, filled with fluid. Polycystic ovaries is caused by hyperandrogenia – excessive male hormones (androgens) production. The main task of treatment is to limit the excess of androgens”.

      I was amused by this metaphor – it’s funny how our subconscious chooses a symptom to convey its message! In the course of Nastya’s session we did find out that her job was to separate psychologically from her father (“limit the excess of male hormones”).

      A little bit later I found out that Nastya got pregnant and had baby.

      “Rice on the inside of a pot”: post scriptum

      It’s not until recently that I found Nastya through mutual acquaintances and found out that she was a mother of two girls. I sent her a piece of text with the description of her session and got an answer, which I quote here with her permission:

      I am very happy for Nastya, I looked at the picture of her two girls born almost ten years apart. Nastay is a happy mother – what else can I say?

      “Motionless sperm”

      An old man goes fishing. But the net is down. No fish is on-line.

      In the beginning of the chapter I said that in our society it’s usually women who undertake “saving” men. His is how they were brought up, the thought that a man can take care of himself does not even enter their minds. I gave three typical examples and there are hundreds more! In the first case, it’s a story of Yana who tries to get pregnant while it’s her husband who has “infertility” diagnosis. In the second case, it’s the story of Kseniya whose reproductive function is blocked, because she tries to meet the expectations of the meaningful men in her life, but does not listen to her heart. Finally, it’s a story of Nastya who feels obliged to fill the life of her drunkard father with meaning, ignoring her own human needs. Healing for women with similar patterns of behavior means discovering that their close ones can take care of themselves and becomong selfish in a good way.

      To sum up, I would like to finish this chapter “Male factor” with

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