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      Published in Great Britain in 2013 by Canongate Books Ltd,

       14 High Street, Edinburgh EH1 1TE

       www.canongate.tv

      This digital edition first published in 2013 by Canongate Books

      Copyright © Pierre Szalowski, 2007

       Avec l’accord des Éditions Hurtubise. Tout droit réservés.

      Translation copyright © Alison Anderson, 2012

      The moral rights of the author and translator have been asserted

      British Library Cataloguing-in-Publication Data A catalogue record for this book is available on request from the British Library

      ISBN 978 0 85786 162 7

       eISBN 978 0 85786 888 6

      Typeset in Plantin Light by Palimpsest Book Production Ltd, Falkirk, Stirlingshire

       For Antoni, Tom, Sophie. For yesterday, today and always.

      ‘In life, there is nothing to fear and everything to understand.

      Marie Curie

      Contents

       Thursday, 25 December 1997

       CHRISTMAS GOES BY SO FAST

       Sunday, 4 January 1998

       THEY’RE ONLY KIDS!

       FISH CHANGE DIRECTION IN COLD WEATHER

       THAT’S WHEN I UNDERSTOOD

       THEY LOVE EACH OTHER

       AND I PRAYED TO THE SKY TO HELP ME

       BÉBÉ . . . JE T’AI, TOI, BÉBÉ . . .

       Monday, 5 January 1998

       YOUR PROBLEMS CAN’T BE THAT BAD

       WHEN SHIT HAPPENS, HUMAN NATURE SHOWS ITS TRUE FACE

       I COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING BETTER TO DO

       IN LIFE, IT’S EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF

       WHAT ON EARTH WAS THE SKY UP TO NOW?

       IT’S A MIRACLE!

       Tuesday, 6 January 1998

       CAN THINGS LIKE THIS REALLY HAPPEN?

       WHAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, A MAN WHO SAYS HE’LL BE BACK

       THEY’LL BE FINE HERE!

       STOP IT, YOU’RE HURTING ME!

       Wednesday, 7 January 1998

       BUSINESS IS BUSINESS

       I WAS NO ONE NOW

       NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING

       I DIDN’T WANT TO WAIT

       HE WAS ABOUT TO FIND OUT

       CAN YOU FIX IT FOR ME?

       Thursday, 8 January 1998

       SOMETIMES LIFE IS JUST LIKE THE MOVIES

       WE QUEBECKERS STICK TOGETHER!

       IT’S ALL THANKS TO A NATURAL DISASTER!

       Friday, 9 January 1998

       I DIDN’T PUT ANY MORE LOGS ON THE FIRE

       IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN LOVE?

       ALL’S WELL THAT ENDS WELL

       Nine years later

      Nowhere and everywhere in Montreal

       Thursday, 25 December 1997

      CHRISTMAS GOES BY SO FAST

      ‘Wait a little longer. Your dad’s asleep.’

      The clock said nine nineteen. I went and sat back down on the bed. I’d already been awake for two hours, waiting in my room. We have this family tradition. Every year Dad orders me not to show my face until after Santa Claus has come and gone. But I’m eleven years old and I stopped believing in Santa Claus five years ago already!

      Five years, that’s a secret; my parents think it’s four.

      I was six and a half when Alex, my only friend, came and told me the sad news with a big smile on his face. I was suddenly thrust into a world where there was an explanation for everything. To get over my disappointment, I did the same thing as Alex, at school. I got a kick out of telling the younger kids that Santa Claus was just something our parents made up. At home I dropped a few remarks to try and make Mum and Dad understand that it was about time they stopped telling me that if I wasn’t

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