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emphasized “Not so among you…” We must not exercise lordship over people or dominate others for our own gain. Many ministry gifts enjoy great respect from church members, but it is a great sin to use this respect to manipulate people. If a pastor from the pulpit speaks about his lack of money, some will probably show up and give him something. But that will not be because The Holy Spirit urged them, but because the pastor manipulated them with what he said.

      It is good when the church takes good care of its leaders, but that must always happen in a voluntary and joyful spirit. Leaders must not announce their personal needs in front of the congregation, but trust that God will in every way care for them. God gives authority to him who serves others and uses his position for the benefit of those around him.

      In the family

      A good example is how the Bible teaches about leadership and family. God has already said in the book of Genesis that man should have a certain authority, but it is not enough to know what kind of authority he has, he must also know in what spirit that authority is exercised.

      Let us look at what the apostle Peter says about this:

      “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.”

1 Peter 3:7

      In this verse Peter says three things about exercising authority:

      a) First: “…dwell with understanding”. If a man does not understand the needs of his wife and children, he can never be a good leader. Only when he is familiar with how they really feel and what they need to be happy, can he lead the family in a proper way.

      This is true for every leader, in any kind of position. A leader must do what he can to understand the people he leads. Knowing their feelings and how things looks from their point of view, gives him the information he needs to make the right decisions. Jesus knew what was in the heart of his disciples. Therefore he gained their trust and confidence.

      Sometimes the people you lead are eager to serve and need someone who spurs them ahead. But other times they can be tired and frustrated, and then it is more important to comfort them, than to chase them forward! A good shepherd understands the state of the flock, he knows both strengths and weaknesses among them – and chooses his actions correctly.

      b) Secondly Peter says: “…giving honor”. A good leader honors the people he works with. As leaders we like to require that every worker does his best, but often forget to honor them. If you already are in a leadership position, when was the last time you really thanked your helpers? When was the last time you made a pleasant surprise for them? Have you taken the opportunity to thank them for what they are doing for the kingdom of God recently? Good leaders do things like this!

      c) Third: “…being heirs together”. Peter reminds us of a very important thing: We are all heirs of the same inheritance. When the day comes when we will stand before God, we will all be on the same level. No one is a leader or a subject anymore. All privileges are gone, and we will be judged according to our deeds. Remembering this will help us to stay humble. It will protect us from arrogance and misuse of authority. It will help us to be better leaders.

      These are good examples for us who serve in the church. The best that can happen to us is that we learn these principles before we start to lead ourselves. As I said, misuse of power causes great harm and brings judgment upon us.

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