LITMIR.BIZ

      What she did

      Lydia was heartbroken. She spent more time at home, holding tight

      to her family. She cried a lot. When she became, as she says, “mad as

      all get-out,” she’d write songs and play them on the piano or the violin.

      Music really helped.

      After a few weeks, Lydia struck up a conversation with a girl named

      Grace. Grace sat in the back of the classroom and kept mostly to her-

      self. Lydia had hardly noticed her before. Now the two hit it off and

      started to hang out together. Before long they were inseparable. Lydia

      remembers, “Grace never got tired of me.” Lydia joked that Grace was

      an “angel” sent to help. And Grace did help. She stuck it out with Lydia

      during that whole awful time. When Lydia ranted and raved about

      people who weren’t handicapped and who parked in the handicapped

      spots, Grace listened. And when Lydia could do nothing but cry as she

      watched her brother struggle, Grace was there. One day when Grace

      knew Lydia was feeling really down, she showed up with two pink roses,

      just to say she cared.

      How it worked out

      As Lydia’s family adjusted and accepted their new challenges, Lydia’s life

      grew more stable. Today, Grace remains one of Lydia’s best friends. The

      old group? Well, they eventually started being nice to Lydia again. She

      gets along with them, but it will never be the same. She looks back now

      and says, “They’re not bad people. They just had no idea what the true

      meaning of friendship is, and I guess I didn’t, either.” But she does now.

      She absolutely does.

      respect

      You’ve heard the word your whole life—at home, in school, everywhere:

      respect. “Respect adults,” “Respect yourself,” “Respect the rules,” “Be

      respectful,” and so on.

      So what does respect have to do with friendship?

      Everything.

      Respect is what you offer

      a friend because you

      honor the friendship.

      You could treat a friend rudely—nobody’s going to give you detention

      or ground you if you do. But you choose not to do that. You want your

      friend to know how much she means to you. Of all the things that can

      bind two people together, respect may be the strongest.

      Having respect for someone else means

      • resisting the temptation to talk about your friend behind her back,

       even when you’re angry.

      • trusting that her intentions are good ones.

      • believing her when she says she’s sorry.

      • being happy for her even when you’re really jealous.

      Showing a friend respect takes effort—but it’s worth it. With trust and

      respect, you and your friend will have fewer problems, solve them more

      easily, and enjoy each other a whole lot more.

      The thing I look

      for most in friends

      is how open-minded

      they are. I think it’s

      important that my

      friends can respect

      me for who I am.

      friendship

      hot spots

      So you’ve found a great friend. She has all the qualities you value most,

      and in so many ways she’s perfect. That’s it. Right?

      Uh-uh. It’s not that easy. Friendships need care every bit as much as that

      flower in the garden needs water. Even the best of friends have problems

      now and again. Maybe your feelings are hurt because your friend walked

      home with someone else when you expected her to walk with you. Maybe

      you’re annoyed because she calls ten times a night. Maybe you’re jealous

      of her big success, or she’s jealous of yours. It isn’t as if your friendship is in

      doubt, really, but things aren’t so wonderful, either.

      You’ve hit a friendship hot spot. It’s probably not a big deal: a lot of

      trouble comes from mistakes and miscommunication. But even a little

      problem can rub and rub like a stone in your shoe until it makes a real

      sore. The time to deal with it is now.

Скачать книгу