LITMIR.BIZ

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have nightmares if you don’t eat something.’

      ‘I’ll probably have those anyway,’ she muttered glumly. ‘I’ll probably see Natasha and Stephen walking down the aisle, hand in hand.’

      ‘That sounds like Stephen’s nightmare, not yours,’ he muttered dryly.

      ‘Just because you are frightened of commitment, doesn’t mean every man is,’ Kate retorted sharply.

      ‘So you think Stephen is suddenly going to turn into Mr Commitment, do you? Mr Fidelity?’

      Kate shrugged and took a sip of her drink. ‘I don’t know what Stephen is going to do. I don’t think I know him any more.’

      Nick switched off the TV and turned to look at her. ‘Get real, Kate. Stephen is having a fling. It probably won’t last two minutes.’

      ‘How do you figure that out?’

      ‘Well, for one thing he can hardly keep a job down for two minutes, never mind a relationship.’

      ‘We lived together for two years, Nick. Stephen isn’t that flaky.’

      ‘That’s a matter of opinion,’ Nick retorted dryly.

      ‘At least he tried to settle down.’

      ‘Unlike me, you mean?’

      ‘I didn’t say that.’

      ‘That’s what it sounded like.’

      She frowned. Were they arguing? She and Nick never argued…well, not real arguing—maybe they differed occasionally on small things, but they never snapped at each other. ‘I didn’t mean it to sound like that,’ she said with a shake of her head. ‘But, you know, Stephen may not have been the most reliable of people, but he did try to commit…you haven’t had a serious relationship since Jayne.’

      ‘Yes, you made that point earlier,’ Nick muttered. ‘My relationships may not have lasted long, but at least I have always been honest with my girlfriends. I’ve never lied or cheated.’

      ‘I know—’

      ‘You need to stop romanticizing about Stephen,’ Nick cut across her before she could continue. ‘You’re burying your head in the sand. OK, he may have said he loved you once upon a time, but anyone can pay lip service to emotions. Actions are what matter in the end, and real life isn’t like it is in your picture-perfect, idealized dreams.’

      Kate swallowed hard. ‘Well, I kind of realized that when I saw Stephen in bed with someone else tonight,’ she muttered, her eyes shimmering bright green in the glare of the bedside lamp.

      Nick watched the tears threaten to spill over from her eyes and groaned. ‘I’m sorry, Katy. I shouldn’t have said that.’

      She shook her head. ‘No, you’re right. I am too much of a romantic. I know I am.’

      ‘Well, there’s nothing wrong with that, I suppose.’ Nick’s lips twisted ruefully. ‘Just don’t make excuses for Stephen, OK? It irritates the hell out of me.’

      ‘You never liked him, did you?’ she asked tremulously.

      Nick shook his head. ‘Not much.’

      She bit down on her lip and looked away from him.

      ‘Oh, come on, Kate. You’ve got to admit, there were times when you had no idea where you stood with him. He was inconsistent. One day he was showering you with roses, the next he stood you up.’

      Kate was about to argue and say he had never stood her up, and then she remembered how he hadn’t turned up for her office party last year. Stephen had apologized profusely the next day, though…said he had been held up in a rehearsal with the band.

      ‘He had a bit of an artistic temperament, I suppose,’ she muttered.

      ‘You mean he loved himself more than anyone else.’

      ‘I don’t know,’ she murmured. She finished her coffee and then leaned back against the headboard, stretching her long legs out in front of her on the white bedspread. ‘What am I going to do, Nick?’ she asked him with a sigh. ‘I’ve spent two years of my life working on my relationship with Stephen…what am I going to do now?’

      ‘Get selfish and think about yourself for a while. You’re free to do exactly what you want now. Being single can be fun,’ he said firmly.

      ‘Can it?’ She looked down at her hands. ‘To be honest, it feels a bit scary.’

      ‘That’s only because events have been forced on you, but you’ll be OK.’ He reached out and took one of her hands in both of his. ‘You’re a survivor, Kate, you always have been. You’ll cope without Stephen. You managed before he came along, didn’t you? You were independent and strong. Hell, you even moved out here from London on your own when you were offered a promotion and you didn’t know a soul out here then.’

      ‘That’s true. But that seems like a long time ago now, as if it happened to a different person.’

      ‘It’s only two and a half years ago. You’re still the same person. This is just a set-back, that’s all. You’ll bounce back.’

      ‘I hope you’re right,’ she said hesitantly. ‘At the moment I feel that things are never going to be the same again.’

      ‘And maybe that’s a good thing,’ Nick said firmly.

      ‘Maybe it is,’ she said, watching the way his hand was resting against hers. She had read somewhere that you could tell a person’s personality from their hands. Nick’s were large and capable. She felt as if she could bring any problem and put it into Nick’s hands and he would fix it for her. She’d always felt like that about Nick—he was strong, nothing fazed him. In contrast, Stephen had always made her feel protective towards him. As if he was the one who’d needed her to look after him. He’d brought his problems to her and she’d fixed them. She had thought he’d needed her, but obviously he hadn’t needed her that much…either that or Natasha was fulfilling that role now.

      ‘And when your thoughts do turn to Stephen, remember the bad times. Don’t dwell for a second on any of the good. It will make you feel a hell of a lot better.’

      ‘Is that what you did when you and Jayne split up?’ she asked curiously, looking up into his eyes.

      ‘Something like that.’

      She noticed how he clammed up when she mentioned Jayne. It had always been the same. They could talk about anything and everything, but not Jayne. Kate still didn’t know the real reason why that relationship had broken apart and Nick obviously had no intention of telling her.

      ‘She really loved you, you know,’ Kate said suddenly, seriously. ‘I remember her telling me that a few weeks before your relationship broke up. I remember thinking that she sounded sad, as if she knew it wasn’t going to work out between you. It was almost as if she thought you were in love with someone else.’

      ‘And what did you say?’ Nick asked quietly.

      ‘I told her to the best of my knowledge there wasn’t anyone else. That you cared about her deeply.’ Kate hesitated, her eyes thoughtful. ‘You weren’t cheating on her, were you?’

      Nick shook his head.

      ‘What happened?’ She looked up at him. ‘You went out with her for a long time, Nick, you must have been smitten—so why finish it?’

      ‘Kate, it’s in the past, there’s no point raking over it. Jayne’s probably married with children by now,’ he muttered.

      She frowned. ‘Yes, but that’s not the point, is it—?’

      ‘The point is that we all make mistakes—’

      ‘At least you didn’t make the mistake of living with Jayne,’ she murmured. ‘Moving in with Stephen was a big,

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