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hall and look after you.’

      ‘No. I want to stay here.’ Jessica had to try one last time. ‘My son is in there, Tony. He…’ The new strength Jessica had summoned was more fragile than it felt. She had to choke back a new sob. ‘He might still be alive,’ she added brokenly.

      ‘You can stay close,’ Tony told her. ‘But you can’t come back inside.’

      ‘But…’ Jessica swallowed any more words. Tony was just doing precisely what needed to be done. She would do exactly the same in his position of responsibility. And if her squad leader didn’t do it, someone from Scene Command certainly would.

      ‘It’s OK, Jess.’ Kelly’s voice was reassuringly confident. ‘You can rely on us.’

      Any desire to protest further faded completely as Jessica listened to her classmates decide what they were going to do next. Kelly was right. She could rely on them. All of them. The USAR course had been largely attended by people that Jessica both liked and admired. Paramedic Kelly and another nurse, Wendy, were both close friends now and June was great. Fletch and Ross were both doctors and the guys from the fire service were all strong and caring men. They would all be far more use than Jessica on scene and they wouldn’t stupidly endanger themselves or other members of their team. Jessica kept her head down as she allowed Kelly to lead her away from the scene command headquarters towards the church hall in Sutherland Street where the USAR personnel had decided to take a break.

      Kelly had noticed how quiet Jessica now was. ‘Joe will have found Ricky,’ she said confidently. ‘I’m sure of it. And if there’s any way he can keep them both safe, he’ll do it. He’s not a helicopter paramedic for nothing. Joe’s coped with some pretty dodgy situations in his time—even a chopper crash once.’

      ‘I can’t lose them both.’ Jessica realised as she spoke that Kelly might misconstrue her meaning and think that her feelings for Joe were far stronger than she had admitted. This was not the time to explore just how close to the truth that might be. ‘Not Mum and Ricky,’ she added quickly. ‘Especially not Ricky.’ There could be no misunderstanding the depth of feeling in the last whispered words. ‘He’s my whole life.’

      ‘I know.’ Kelly’s arm tightened around her friend’s waist.

      ‘Is there anyone we can contact for you, Jess?’ Fletch sounded as keen as Kelly to provide comfort. ‘Any family or friends from home?’

      ‘No.’ Jessica shook her head sadly. She had known how small her world was. Why had she never realised how vulnerable it made her? ‘The only people that matter are here. Mum…and Ricky.’

      And Joe. Despite the fact that she knew the attraction wasn’t mutual, Jessica would never forget meeting Joe Barrington. Any new fantasies of finding a meaningful relationship and future happiness would have a role model she knew it would be impossible to improve on. Yes, Joe mattered. Rather a lot. Even more so now that she had lost her mother.

      The protection of the numbing shock her mother’s death had produced was wearing off. Jessica could feel a nasty prickle reminiscent of waking from a nightmare. Perhaps the feeling had stirred because her group was now walking near the large tent that contained the temporary morgue catering for the incident’s fatalities. Her mother would be in there and Jessica decided she’d better at least start dealing with her grief now. If she didn’t, what sort of shape might she be in when they found Ricky and she needed to focus on being a mother rather than a daughter?

      ‘I want to go in there,’ she said quietly. ‘I want to see Mum again.’

      ‘Are you sure?’ Kelly sounded doubtful.

      Jessica nodded and tried to hold back a new outbreak of tears. She cleared her throat. ‘Would you come with me, please, Kelly?’

      Fletch offered to accompany her instead but Jessica didn’t want male company. Kelly had a close relationship with her own mother. She would understand at least part of what Jessica had to go through.

      The rows of covered bodies in the closely guarded tent was horrific. Officials in charge of this grim area were now sadly used to coping with distraught relatives coming in to identify and mourn the loss of loved ones. The process of removing those already identified and seen by the medical forensic officer had begun and a hearse was parked discreetly at the back of the tent. Jessica and Kelly were given as much privacy as possible with portable screens, and someone had done a wonderful job of cleaning up her mother and covering the injuries as best they could.

      Jessica had no idea how long she spent in there or how Kelly coped so well with her raw grief, but when she emerged she knew she had done the right thing. She had overcome the barrier of acknowledging her loss and had begun the process of grieving. And she could be quite certain now that she was going to survive all this. Again, she was tapping into the well of strength she hadn’t known she possessed and a tiny part of her felt proud she had discovered it and determined that she would never lose sight of such a valuable attribute.

      Her friendship with Kelly Drummond was also valuable. ‘Thank you,’ Jessica said to her simply as they headed once more towards the church hall. ‘I don’t think I could have done that without you.’

      ‘That’s what friends are for.’ Kelly smiled. ‘I’m here for you, Jess. So are Wendy and Ross and Fletch and June. And Joe.’ The afterthought was almost guilty—as though Kelly had forgotten her confidence that Joe had survived and would be found.

      Jessica nodded solemnly and managed to return a faint replica of Kelly’s smile. She was going to need all her friends in the near future, that was certain. What was painfully uncertain was whether she had any basis on which to pin her hopes that Joe would be amongst them.

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