LITMIR.BIZ

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SAT IN the back seat of Austin’s old SUV doing sums in her small notebook. She wouldn’t pay him back for the gas since they were going this way anyway, but she would pay him back for everything she’d ordered at lunch.

      She remembered to add the extra dollar for rye toast.

      This ride to the next town would give her ankle a chance to heal. Things couldn’t have worked out better.

      Fascinated by the bantering between the men in the front seat, she eavesdropped shamelessly. She’d been on the road so long she didn’t know what a normal friendship felt like. Thinking back, she couldn’t remember having had one.

      The friends she’d had as a child had all been adults and transitory, coming and going as careers and jobs changed.

      These men had a strong friendship. She sensed how deep and real it was and it filled her with envy.

      Finn talked; Austin listened. She’d learned this lesson about relationships—in many, one was the talker and the other the listener, one the social butterfly and the other happy to take a back seat.

      “No way will they lose this year,” Finn said. “Even on their bad days, they’re miles better than the Broncos.”

      She’d lost track of the conversation, something about sports teams, but she’d missed which sport they were discussing, distracted by a gurgling in her stomach. She rubbed it.

      In the rearview mirror, Austin glanced at her. She settled her hand back into her lap. The man didn’t miss much. Good cop. That was all she needed, to have this guy pester her with an I told you so.

      “They’re an awesome team,” Austin said. “Even if they did lose this year. They could go all the way next year.”

      If he said I told you so, he would be right. She should have eaten less food more slowly.

      Finn popped the lid on a can of nuts and, one by one, tossed them into the air and caught them in his mouth. “They choked, man. No way will they take the championship this year.”

      He offered the can to Austin, who shook his head. He ignored Gracie, she noticed. Just as well. Her tummy gurgled and roiled.

      Austin’s response was quiet. “We’ll see. They lost. Let’s get past it and hope for a better result this year.” The voice of reason. He probably made a good cop.

      Teams. Athletes. She knew nothing about sports, or popular culture, or TV shows. Ironic when you thought about it, because—

      A stomach cramp had her hissing in a breath. Fortunately, Austin hadn’t noticed. Or had he? His eyes flickered to the mirror and back to the road.

      She studied his profile. Where Finn was lean, quick and full of nervous energy, and a couple of inches shorter than Austin, Austin could probably out-calm the Dalai Lama. He didn’t have the Dalai Lama’s charming wit and smile, though. She knew. She’d met the man once, and had been enchanted by him. It had been difficult for her, though, with him so pure and kind, and her a fraud.

      What held Austin back? What caused the sadness that lurked in his fine blue eyes?

      “What’s so great about this herd we’re going to see?” Austin asked. Everything about him, even his strong, straight profile, was serious.

      “I went to college with the owner. A great guy. He’s giving up his hobby ranch. Needs to sell the herd.” Finn tossed peanuts into his mouth then offered the can to Austin again, who shook his head and pointed over his shoulder to her in the backseat. Finn offered them to Gracie, reluctantly. Odd as it was for someone who’d been starving a short while ago, the thought of eating even one left her nauseated.

      She shook her head.

      “Knowing this guy—” Finn turned around again “—those cattle will be top quality and in good shape.”

      “Can’t wait to see them.” Ah, a spark of excitement lit Austin’s voice. So, they were on a trip to see some cows. She wondered why, so eavesdropped some more.

      The gist was that these guys were apparently on their way to Texas, where Austin was going to buy a herd of cattle. So...Austin was not only a sheriff’s deputy, but also a rancher?

      “You want a mouser for the barn?” Finn asked. “I’ve got a real little cutie in the office right now.”

       What office?

      “No one’s adopting her. All everyone wants these days is kittens.” He ate more peanuts. “I don’t want to put her down. Worst part of the job is putting down healthy animals just ’cause they don’t have a home.”

      Finn was a veterinarian?

      “I’d really like to find her a home.”

      “You can’t take her to your dad’s ranch?” Austin asked.

      Finn grinned. “Dad would kill me if I brought home another stray. He knows how much I love animals, but put his foot down after the last dog I brought over.”

      Austin smiled. “Yeah, I remember all the strays you took home even before you became a vet.”

      Ah. So he really was a vet. He had at least that going for him even if he was a jerk in other ways.

      “Sure.” Austin shifted gears. “I’ll take the cat.”

      A satisfied grin lit Finn’s face.

      Finn made a joke about a bunch of cows in a field they were passing and Austin laughed—so the man could laugh—the affection between them palpable.

      Again, that pang of envy.

      Even before Gracie had run away, there had been few people she could trust. There’d been Gran and...that was it. No one else.

      Now Gran was gone and Gracie was alone.

      The men laughed and she pulled her gaze away from the fields flying past the vehicle.

      Her stomach cramped. Crap, she felt sick and shivery. Her stomach churned.

      It cramped again, hard and sharp.

      “Stop the car,” she croaked.

      “What?”

      A strong breeze rushed through the open windows, but it wasn’t enough to stem the rush of bile into her throat.

      “Stop the car,” she shouted.

      Austin jerked the steering wheel and slammed on the brakes. The car fishtailed on the gravel shoulder.

      Gracie just managed to scramble out and make it to the ditch before losing her lunch.

      She retched until there was nothing left, and she wanted to cry. All of that food wasted when her body needed it so badly.

      She heard footsteps on the road behind her, calm and measured. Had to be Austin.

      She felt a hand on her shoulder.

      “Here.” A hand held a tissue in front of her face.

      Embarrassing. It wasn’t bad enough the man had to see her as a homeless person, now he had to witness this indignity?

      “Sorry,” she said.

      He rested his hand on her back while she retched one more time, his touch reassuring. She wiped her mouth.

      “You have any gum or mints?” she asked.

      “Yeah.” He removed his hand. She missed the warmth. She heard him walk to the car. He returned a minute later with a pack of gum.

      “Thanks.” She took two sticks because her mouth tasted like crap and the gum was sweet and minty. The chewing and her saliva helped to settle her stomach.

      She wiped her damp forehead and brushed sweat from her upper lip. When her legs stopped shaking, she returned to the vehicle with Austin keeping step beside her.

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