LITMIR.BIZ

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God, Nate. I’m sorry. I haven’t thought about your mother.”

      “No need to apologize,” Nate said, relieved when she withdrew her hand. But he did glance over at her. “My mother isn’t going to realize I’m there, of course. Just like she didn’t realize David came to see her every week. But I’ll know.”

      Nate looked back at the highway.

      “Do you get that’s the same way I feel about Ahn? I need to know I didn’t turn my back on her.”

      “When you put it that way, yes. I do understand how you feel.”

      “Look at us,” she said. “We’re actually agreeing on something.”

      “And I hope you’ll agree with something else,” Nate told her. “Since I’m not going back to Afghanistan, I should be the one to stay with Ahn and the nanny. That will leave you free to go home and back to work.”

      Hallie sent him a wary look.

      “When you’re ready to go back to work, of course,” Nate added quickly.

      “I never considered you wouldn’t go back. But you’re right. The fact that you’re staying changes everything.”

      “I’m not sure what you mean.”

      “I mean, of course you’ll stay at the house, Nate. You live there.”

      She was referring to the guest cottage on David and Janet’s property. It wasn’t feasible to maintain a stateside apartment when he was out of the country most of the time, so he’d been using the cottage as his residence.

      “Did you really think if I stayed at Janet and David’s I would expect you to leave?” she asked.

      “Before we had our conversation in the bathroom this morning, yes.”

      “Well, you’re wrong,” she said. “Even if we’d never talked, I wouldn’t have expected you to leave just because I was staying there.”

      “And your thoughts on my proposal about the nanny?”

      “You can really see yourself being a world-renowned photojournalist turned verbal, cognitive and physical child therapist?”

      “No,” Nate admitted. “But I also can’t see you resigning and putting your career on hold when I’m free to stay with Ahn.”

      “So I get a pass,” she said, “and you get stuck with all the responsibility.”

      “I prefer to think of it as making a logical decision under the circumstances.”

      She looked over at him. “I can’t go to work and not feel guilty about it.”

      “Then stay on the weekends if that will make you feel less guilty.” That arrangement was still potentially dangerous by putting them in proximity and giving them the opportunity to act on what was going on between them. He wasn’t so naive as to think they’d be able to resist—truly only her animosity toward him all these years had accomplished that. But if he could restrict her time in the house to weekends he might be able to forestall them landing in bed.

      So he had to convince her to return to work. And he’d figure out how to step into Ahn’s daily learning regimen.

      Hallie’s silence stretched out. When he glanced at her she was rubbing her temples with her fingertips. Was that because she found his suggestion so outrageous she was pissed at him? Or did she think it had merit? He latched on to the fact she hadn’t said no yet. He didn’t intend to lose his momentum.

      “You heard what Deb said about Ahn being more likely to bond with her new father if I stepped in. That’s another reason I should be the one to stay.”

      She let out a long sigh. “And I also heard what she said about me not being able to properly evaluate the applicants if I’ve never played the parent role.” She looked over at him. “Admit it. I’m obviously not a very good judge of character, or I wouldn’t have been so wrong about you all these years.”

      He couldn’t let her take responsibility for reacting to a situation he’d created. “That was my fault.”

      “Truthfully, Nate, I’m not capable of making any decisions right now. Okay?”

      “Absolutely.” He could commiserate. The only thing that kept him choosing one thing over another these days was experience—once upon a time he’d been in similar circumstances with far fewer resources and less maturity. “Think about it and we’ll discuss it later.”

      As Nate focused on the highway, he was relieved she hadn’t immediately shot down his solution to the problem. The fact that they’d had a rational discussion rein forced the rightness of his impulse to tell her the truth about his attraction all those years ago. He’d thought that information would go to the grave with him. But he was glad she knew—she didn’t deserve to think less of herself because of his sense of self-preservation.

      Sure, he’d have to keep a check on his attraction to her—something that would be much easier if she weren’t living at the house. But the most important thing now was for them to be able to look at the situation in a logical manner.

      Hopefully Hallie would see his suggestion made the most sense.

      Surely, she would realize that.

      HALLIE WAS RELIEVED when Nate headed for the guest cottage once they arrived at the house. As strained as it had been not talking to each other for the past few weeks, Hallie found it as difficult now that they were talking.

      Or maybe it was only what they were talking about.

      It would take days to completely wrap her mind around everything that had happened this morning. Her mind-blowing inheritance. Her big showdown with Nate. The reality check she’d gotten about the nanny. Then Nate’s suggestion that she return to work and let him take care of Ahn with a nanny’s help.

      Hallie was too confused to process anything, her mind jammed with information overload.

      As she walked to the main house, her thoughts travelled back four years to when she, Janet and David had driven out here to Winchester, an upscale little town north of Boston. Once Janet and David made the decision to adopt, they’d started house hunting immediately. Winchester had been at the top of their short list because it was one hundred percent family-focused.

      Hallie hadn’t been surprised when Janet instantly fell in love with this two-story contemporary, all stone and glass, that was situated on three acres of waterfront property facing Wedge Pond. The house had Janet’s name written all over it. But Hallie knew the guest cottage adjacent to the main house was what had sold David on the place.

      She’d been invited to dinner shortly after Janet and David moved in, as had Nate, home for a quick stay between assignments. It was one of the few times she hadn’t dragged a date along. Hallie would never forget the proud look on David’s face when he’d handed Nate the keys to the cottage.

      “Welcome home, brother,” David had said. “Your keys. Your cottage. My thanks for all you’ve done for me.”

      Because of their mother’s chronic depression, David had always given Nate credit for making sure he had a home when they were growing up. The cottage finally provided David with a way to pay Nate back.

      Now, David and Janet had left the property to both of them. But as far as Hallie was concerned, the place belonged to Nate. After the readoption, she would sign over her half and give it to Nate free and clear.

      And she wasn’t going to argue with Nate about it.

      She had no use for a rambling two-story house. Especially not out in the suburbs. She was a city girl through and through, and she loved her downtown Boston apartment.

      It made her wonder if Nate had any idea how tempting his offer was. She would give anything to go home. To sleep in her own bed. To try to re-create some normalcy in her life.

      As

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