Hopelessly Devoted To You - Jill Steeples

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defined features and jawline.

      In casually cut blue jeans, brown belt, a white crisp shirt open at the neck, brown deck shoes, he looked effortlessly stylish. Effortlessly chic. Typically Finn.

      Not that he cultivated his cool good looks in any way. Finn looked exactly the way nature intended. Which just so happened to be pretty damn gorgeous.

      Looking at him now, in all his glorious gorgeousness, she wondered if this would be her last remaining memory of him.

      Finn was undoubtedly hot and yet she realised, with a heartfelt pang, she felt nothing for him any more, not even a trace of desire. When they first got together they couldn’t keep their hands off each other, but if she was being honest with herself she’d been missing that loving feeling for months. Nausea rose in the back of her throat and her stomach churned with anxiety. Wasn’t that proof enough that their relationship was over?

      She sighed inwardly, sadness creeping around her body, knowing that she was throwing away their shared future, one they’d discussed on many occasions. One that Finn had spent the last ten years working for and would continue to work for, all so that he could provide for Ruby and the children they would inevitably have together. There’d be an apartment in the city, a big house in the country, the obligatory dogs, long summer holidays spent at their villa in Tuscany or the South of France.

      And she was throwing it away for what? She had no idea. Her income from her freelance work as an illustrator was unreliable to say the least. Some weeks, most weeks, she had to work shifts as a waitress just to bring in a bit of spare cash. The sort of money she brought home wouldn’t even come close to the sort of lifestyle she knew she’d be guaranteed if she stayed with Finn.

      Still, this was not the time to get distracted by what-ifs.

      It wasn’t about that. Money and all those material things. It was about her inner happiness. What was right in the long term for her and Finn. Trouble was she’d spent so long with Finn she couldn’t imagine a time when he wouldn’t be in her life. But that wasn’t a valid reason enough for her to stay.

      If only she loved him the same way he loved her then everything would be so much simpler. But it wasn’t going to happen. She knew that now. She’d been waiting months, no, years, for it to happen and Laura was right. If she didn’t feel it now, what made her think she would wake up the day after their wedding and suddenly find herself madly and passionately in love with Finn? She’d been a fool to think that was even a remote possibility.

      ‘Oh, shit!’ she cried, remembering she’d left the sauté potatoes sautéing lightly, which were now, judging by the acrid smell wafting their way, singeing nicely.

      ‘They’ll be fine.’ Finn came up behind her, resting his hands on her waist, a small chuckle escaping his lips as he peered over her shoulder to survey the burnt offerings in the frying pan. ‘Just scrape the black bits off.’

      There he was again, invading her territory, assaulting her senses. His easy familiarity washed over her like a big warm comfort blanket. The thought of telling Finn their relationship was over hadn’t been easy to contemplate when she’d discussed it with Laura. Now, with him breathing down her neck, it seemed like an insurmountable task.

      ‘Do you want to pour the wine? There’s one already open in the fridge,’ she asked, feeling a heat tinge her cheeks, wondering how she would ever get through the rest of the evening. Couldn’t she just tell him now without having to go through the whole cooking dinner thing? It was like being on Hell’s Kitchen with her walking ever closer into the fire. Thinking about it, she had no idea how he would react. Would he erupt into a fiery display of emotion? She doubted it. Finn was a clear-thinking, logical lawyer, used to keeping his emotions in check.

      ‘Everything okay?’

      ‘Mmm. Yes, fine.’ Ruby flapped a tea towel in front of her face to try and rid the kitchen of the smell of burning and to fan the heat from her glowing cheeks. ‘How would you like your steak cooked?’

      Finn widened his deep blue eyes, a bemused smile flickering at the corners of his mouth.

      ‘Ideally rare, but however it comes is fine by me.’

      What made her ask that? She sounded like a disinterested waitress. She knew everything there was to know about Finn, including how he liked his steak cooked.

      She’d sat through enough expensive restaurant meals to know what he’d choose from a menu without even asking him. Judging by Finn’s expression, he was as bemused by her question as she was.

      ‘Are you sure you’re okay?’ His hands found her shoulders, his fingertips massaging her tense muscles as his warmly familiar features observed her closely. A shiver ran the length of her body. ‘It’s just that you seem a bit distracted, a bit uptight. We could always go out to eat instead, if you prefer.’

      ‘No!’ she snapped, extracting herself from his distracting hold. Why did he have to be so goddam reasonable the whole time? It drove her mad. ‘It’s almost done now. Go and sit down. Take the glasses through. I’ll be there in a minute.’

      She could do this. She had to do this. She plonked the steaks on the plate. They were more chargrilled now than rare, to match the potatoes and her mood, but they would have to do. She was really past caring about the state of the food.

      Okay. Here goes, Ruby thought. It was now or never.

      ‘That was delicious.’ Finn smiled, pushing his plate to one side. ‘Let me go and fetch the champagne. I’ve got some news.’

      Before Ruby’s mouth had even dropped open to numero uno unflattering pose, Finn was up and out into the kitchen, opening cupboard doors, leaving Ruby wondering how she’d missed her moment. What news could Finn possibly have? Maybe, just maybe, he’d been feeling the same way as her and wanted to call off their engagement. Wouldn’t that be a result? Only Finn wouldn’t be sweating over what to say or how to do it, he would just break open a bottle of finest champagne and announce it in his inimitable style. They’d raise a toast to the time they’d spent together and to their future separate lives and they would vow to stay in touch and remain good friends and there would be no hard feelings between them.

      Now she was delving into the realms of fantasy. One thing she was certain of was Finn’s total and all-consuming love for her.

      ‘News?’ she said weakly, when he returned with the flutes and champagne bottle, the big smile on his face suggesting it was only good news he had to tell.

      ‘Yes. Owen Richardson called me into his office today.’ A smile lit up his features, his eyes shining with pride. ‘They’ve made me a partner.’

      Ruby’s mouth fell open to say something but there was nothing forthcoming. Her mind ran over this shattering news.

      ‘Really? Oh, my goodness! That’s…that’s…’

      Oh, God, no! Not today. Of all days. Was the God of Coincidences conspiring against Ruby to bring Finn the best news he could ever hope for on the day she was planning to give him the worst news he could ever imagine? She couldn’t have planned it worse if she’d tried.

      ‘That’s amazing,’ she managed, remembering she was still the devoted girlfriend. She forced herself to leap up from the chair and wrap her arms around Finn for a congratulatory hug.

      It was amazing. More than amazing when she came to think of it. It was what Finn had been working for all those years, part of the master plan, but neither of them could have expected it to come now, so soon.

      ‘I know.’ He pulled back from her embrace, holding her at arm’s length, his eyes roaming her face with barely concealed excitement. ‘It’ll make me the youngest partner in the history of the firm. All those things we wanted to do, Ruby, we can do them so much sooner now.’

      ‘The youngest partner in the history of the firm.’

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