LITMIR.BIZ

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could he give guidance to a child when he’d lacked positive male influences in his own life? Hell, his own father hadn’t been in his life for years. Even his maternal grandfather hadn’t been attentive to him as a child, or as an adult. His chest tightened as he recalled the familiar rejection. No matter what he’d achieved in sports, academics, in his career, Holt never could live up to his grandfather, Mackenzie Pershing’s, expectations. And he’d never been given the chance to live up to John Rawlins’s.

      Holt entered the barn and found Zach cleaning a stall.

      “So how did it go?” the old man asked.

      “Looks like the kid will be around for a while,” Holt told him. “I’m going to take out Rusty.”

      The old man beamed. “That’s a good idea. Why don’t you ask the youngin’ to go along?”

      Holt headed to the tack room. “Not now, I need some time alone. Besides, he and Leah are deciding how to fix up his room.” He took the saddle off the sawhorse and carried it to the stall.

      Zach followed after him. “You want to know what I think?”

      “Not really.” Holt soothed the gelding and slipped the bridle on.

      The foreman ignored him. “Since you arrived here, you’ve kept to yourself too much. There’s some good folks around here. Being a little neighborly wouldn’t hurt.”

      “I’m a New Yorker. We’re not known for being overly friendly.”

      Zach removed his worn hat and scratched his nearly bald head. “Just like your father. For years after your mother took you away, John pretty much stayed here, avoiding people.” The old man smiled. “Until little Leah showed up. She was in high school back then, and cute as a button. All legs, and with braces on her teeth. She was going to be a photographer and she wanted to take pictures of Hidden Falls. Said it was for a school project. John wasn’t too keen on it at first, but she was a pesky thing and finally he gave in. That boyfriend of hers kept bringing her out here …”

      “Her boyfriend?”

      “Yeah, some big football player. I think they call them jocks now. Whoever he was, he followed her around, doing her bidding.”

      Holt didn’t want to hear about Leah’s old boyfriends. “I know the feeling,” he murmured as he spread the blanket over the horse’s back.

      “You say something?” Zach asked.

      “No.” He lifted the saddle onto Rusty’s back and began to tighten the cinch.

      “Well, like I was sayin’, Leah was a frequent visitor out here. John got so he looked forward to seeing her.”

      Holt was tired of hearing about Leah’s happy times with John Rawlins. “I’m going to check the herd. I’ll probably finish repairing the pasture fence and be back in a few hours.” He slipped on his gloves with the hope that some physical work would help kill his awareness of Leah.

      “You know, Holt, you’re turning into quite the rancher. You haven’t shied away from any of the hard work. Your father would be proud.”

      “Too bad it took so long for me to get back here.”

      The old man rubbed his jaw. “Maybe there were things John couldn’t control. I wish you could have known him.”

      Holt stiffened. “And that’s my fault? The man knew where I lived. He chose not to see me.”

      Holt led Rusty out of the stall hoping to find some peace. He sure wasn’t going to get much with a full house.

      That next afternoon, Leah went looking for the absent Holt. With directions from Zach, she rode Daisy along the fence into the grassy valley. Since Mrs. Gerard left yesterday she hadn’t had a chance to talk with Holt. Alone. She had a suspicion he was avoiding her. Well, he wasn’t going to ignore her any longer.

      She spotted Rusty tied to a tree and not far away was the man she’d been looking for. She rode closer and discovered that he’d removed his shirt, leaving him in an undershirt, revealing his muscular shoulders and arms. Sweat beaded against his skin as he worked to stretch barbed wire along the newly placed post.

      Holt looked up as she approached. He didn’t seem happy to see her. “Is there a problem?”

      “No, Corey’s fine,” she said as she climbed off her mount. “He’s with Zach.”

      Holt went back to stretching the wire. “Then why did you track me down?”

      “Maybe if you didn’t just disappear all the time, I wouldn’t have to. We need to talk.”

      He finished hammering the horseshoe nail into the wood, then turned to her. “Okay, tell me what’s so important that it couldn’t wait until I got back?”

      “I wanted to talk to you …” She was suddenly distracted by the sweat glistening on his shoulders. “I mean about…how we handle Corey. Since it’s summertime he doesn’t have school. And he has a lot of time on his hands.”

      “Well, I don’t,” Holt told her. “I have a ranch to run. Next week is roundup. Tomorrow we’re bringing the herd here.”

      “That’s what I meant, if you would have taken the time to tell me …”

      Anger flashed in his eyes as he dropped his hammer. Pulling off his gloves, he walked toward her. “And why would I feel the need to do that?” Under the shade of the trees, he removed his hat and stopped in front of her. “You’re my pretend wife, Leah, not my real one.”

      “Nor would I want to be,” she retorted.

      His gaze roamed over her body making her feel exposed. Then he smiled. “Don’t knock it, if you haven’t tried it.” He reached out and touched her cheek. “Maybe we should practice at being loving parents.”

      Leah pushed his hand away. “Stop it.” She stepped back. “What is wrong with you? I thought you were okay with having Corey live at your house.”

      “I am. He’s not a bad kid. It’s you I’m having trouble dealing with.”

      She was hurt. “Me? But you asked me to move in. In fact you insisted on it.”

      Holt shut his eyes momentarily. He had insisted, but he didn’t realize the toll her living in his house would take on him, on his sanity. “Yes, but all day every day. You’re everywhere.” If she wasn’t in the kitchen, cooking, he could hear her laughter throughout the house. Even when he walked by the bathroom, he could catch the scent of her soap. His gaze locked with hers. “You’re too tempting, Leah.”

      Her face reddened. “I’m not trying to be.”

      “But it’s the reality.”

      “But for Corey’s sake, it wouldn’t be a good idea to act on those thoughts.”

      “So it’s for the kid’s sake that you rode all this way?”

      He watched her breathing grow rapid. She gave him a weak nod.

      “You’re a liar, Leah” he accused. “You could have waited until I got back. Maybe you’re feeling it, too. This thing between us.”

      Against his better judgment, he took a step closer.

      She couldn’t get away because Daisy was behind her.

      “I should get back.”

      He knew she was right. He knew that he should just send her away, but ever since that day at the falls when he’d kissed her, he’d wanted to kiss her again.

      “You should have just left me alone, Leah. A man can only take so much.” He never realized how overwhelming just knowing she was sleeping down the hall from him…She was the first person he saw in the morning and the last person at night …

      If he let her, she could become an obsession. “You

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