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Queen. Aimee Carter
Читать онлайн.Название Queen
Год выпуска 0
isbn 9781474046619
Автор произведения Aimee Carter
Издательство HarperCollins
“Isn’t that exactly what we’re doing by fighting this rebellion in the first place?” I dug out a pair of black pants and a black top. Perfect for sneaking around. “I need to take a shower. I’ll be home by dinnertime.”
“Kitty—”
“We’ll talk about this then, okay?” I said, but he grabbed the bathroom door before I could open it.
“No, we’re talking about this now, because there might not be a then.”
I let my hand fall from the knob and stared up at him defiantly. “You’re not talking me out of this.”
“Then we have a problem, because I don’t know how many more times I can do this.”
My mouth went dry. “You don’t have to do this, Benjy. It would be safer for you if you weren’t here anyway.”
“Do you really think being away from you would help? I’d still worry constantly—”
“I don’t want you to worry,” I said, exasperated. “You should be focusing on your own life, not mine. And it feels like the deeper we go into this war, the more I distract you.”
“You’re part of my life, Kitty. The most important part.” He reached out to touch me, but I shifted back, and he dropped his hand. “Yes, I worry about you. I worry about what this is doing to you—being Lila, fighting for people you didn’t even know four months ago. I can tell it’s slowly chipping away at you, one day at a time, and I hate myself for not being able to protect you from all of this.”
“It isn’t your job to protect me.”
“But you’ll let Knox try.”
The ground felt as if it had dropped out from under me, and I opened and shut my mouth in shock. “Is that it, then? Is that what all of this is about? You’re mad I stayed with Knox last night?”
“Well, I’m not exactly happy about it,” he said, with more sarcasm than I’d thought he had in him. “You’re hurt. I wanted to be there for you—to give you a relaxing night where you could rest. Instead, you spent it with him. And sometimes—” He stopped.
“Sometimes what?” I pressed, an edge in my voice. “Whatever it is, let it out, Benjy. Because there might not be a then, remember?”
The moment I said it, guilt washed over me. He’d done nothing to deserve this fight, and I was being a complete jerk about something I knew was quickly becoming a problem for us. Rivers pointing out Knox’s supposed feelings had been bad enough; Benjy bringing it up made me want to claw the walls with frustration and anger. And if he really thought I would ever do anything with Knox when he was waiting for me just a room or two away, then he didn’t know me at all.
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