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it may be seen as an opening to the fulfilling side of freedom.

      But what does this discussion of nonbeing have to do with freedom? Strange as it may initially seem, the experience of the threat of nonbeing that I have just described (drawing again from Paul Tillich) is one aspect of the experience of the horizon of freedom. “Nonbeing” is the face that freedom first presents to us as it invites us into its embrace. And difficult as it may be for us to understand, it is by realistically facing rather than running away from this nonbeing that we are liberated from the things that enslave us and drawn toward the fullness of freedom.

      Nonbeing is terrifying to us, of course, and so we attempt to avoid it by tying our fragile existence to things that seemingly provide refuge from it. However, since all such things are themselves merely finite and, therefore, also subject to nonbeing, the security they give us is only fragmentary and ultimately illusory. Such precarious security is not truly liberating in the final analysis for it merely constricts our lives by binding us to objects that are too small to help us face existential anxiety. Just as we strive to turn the anxiety of nonbeing into specific objects of fear that we can control, so also we turn to specific objects, persons, events, nations, cults, possessions, etc. in order to anchor our existence against the invasion of nonbeing. Eventually, however, we will be forced to realize that they are mere “idols” that cannot give us the ultimate deliverance for which we really hope. How, then, are we to deal with nonbeing?

      If human freedom has any realistic meaning at all, it cannot mean deliverance from existential anxiety. The quest for freedom is destined for frustration as long as it is undertaken as the search for refuge from nonbeing. This is one lesson that theists can well learn from existentialist philosophers. In what, then, does human freedom consist (freedom in our second sense), if there in no easy escape from fate, death, guilt and the experience of doubt and even meaninglessness? Is human freedom even a meaningful notion, given the fact that our existence is never “free from” existential anxiety?

      Humanly speaking, freedom is the awareness that existential anxiety has been conquered rather than simply evaded. It is an awareness that, in spite of the pervasive threat of nonbeing, the core of our existence is always already ultimately secure. Such an awareness delivers us from the obsessive need to secure our existence in particular things and projects. It recognizes the futility of all such enterprises. And it allows for a serenity and peacefulness of existence that transcends the security which comes from our usual possessions.

      But is such an awareness anywhere an actuality? Are there individuals who have achieved such a state of subjective freedom? I think that we do find such awareness exemplified in the lives of people who exhibit courage. It is not necessary to give examples of such courage here. We see it manifest all around us—in the heroic lives of ordinary people who have themselves been motivated to courageous acceptance of their lives by their participation in the great stories of human courage, passed down from generation to generation, in all cultures and traditions. We have all witnessed the way in which people overcome apparently insurmountable difficulties and emerge as stronger in the process of facing their problems than if they had taken flight from them. This everyday occurrence is, in fact, so commonplace that we hardly notice its utterly “miraculous” character. It is in the lives of such courageous people that we can catch a glimpse of the ultimate horizon of freedom that seeks to liberate our human existence in a decisive way.

      Our finite freedom (freedom in the second sense) is not a negative “freedom from,” but rather a participatory freedom, an experience of opening oneself to and being grasped by the encompassing freedom that embraces and conquers the threat of nonbeing. This horizon of freedom of which we partake cannot be comprehended intellectually. It is not a possession and it cannot be controlled by acts of “willfulness” on our part. It can only be experienced by oneself or pointed to as it becomes evident in the courageous lives of human persons. Its reality is felt only in the act of allowing oneself to be grasped by it. For that reason any scientific demonstration of its presence is impossible.

      In the concrete lives of heroic people, moreover, we may encounter the fascinans, the fulfilling side of freedom; we may get an inkling of the dimension of freedom that corresponds with the “grounding” aspect of our experience of depth; and we may also observe the foundation of what we called hope in the previous chapter.

      The name of this ultimately grounding and courage-bestowing horizon of freedom that becomes transparent in acts of courage is—God. That grounding freedom is what the word “God” means. And if that word has not much meaning for you, translate it and speak of the deep freedom for which you yearn, beyond the finite securities you cling to in order to escape existential anxiety. Perhaps, in order to do this, you must forget many things you have learned about “God,” perhaps even the word itself. But as long as you open yourself to a courage whereby you realistically accept your existence, you cannot then call yourself an atheist in any meaningful sense of the term. For you cannot consistently maintain that there is no basis in reality for your courage. Even in your uttering such a statement, you would give evidence of your participating in such a power of self-affirmation.