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Marriage

      In total, I’ve had three intimate relationships in my life—all of which resulted from a woman making it clear to me that she wanted to date. In the case of my wife, our relationship eventually turned into a romantic one, but it may not have, had she had not made her sentiments clear. After playing the harp for 9 years in the Beijing Symphony, she arrived in the United States from China to further her education. She had been in the U.S. for about 18 months when we met as graduate students in a music class. Reviewing each other’s homework morphed into doing things socially. Then, one day at a beach, she suddenly gave me a big hug and kiss, and she held my hand. On the basis of my readings, this made me realize that she probably wanted to be my girlfriend. We have now been married for more than 21 years.

      Forming platonic relationships or simple friendships with the opposite sex is not too difficult for me. However, forming an intimate relationship with a person of the opposite sex was always very difficult or impossible for me to initiate. I was just lucky that the three women I dated (especially my wife) made their intentions so clear that their wishes could not be misunderstood. Without these women making their intentions known, I would likely remain single to this day.

       ROLE MODELS

      My grandfather was the smartest person I knew and had great mechanical abilities. Initially very poor, he educated himself, became a lawyer, had his own business selling plastic shades all over the world, and could plan and build a house from the ground up. He had little tolerance for stupidity and changes in routine, even as simple as dinner being 10 minutes late. Thinking back, he probably had some Asperger’s tendencies.

      As I moved into high school, Bernard Thévenet, two-time winner of the Tour de France bicycle race, became a role model of mine. I had a big poster of him in my bedroom, and I wanted to be like him. Tullio Campagnolo was an Italian bicycle racing component maker. I didn’t want to become Tullio. However, I thought Campagnolo bicycle components were just the most beautiful and functional components that could ever be made for a bicycle.

      I always admired musical composers, such as Tschaikovsky, Beethoven, Mozart, Berlioz, Mahler, Richard Strauss, Schubert, and Stravinsky. I didn’t want to be like them, but I was inspired by their music and wanted to compose like they did. I spent a lot of time burrowing into musical scores and rearranging the instrumentation for different ensembles. I thought the most honorable thing one could do was to become a music major at a conservatory or university—which I eventually did.

      During my graduate work, a music history professor by the name of Joel Sheveloff impressed me. He had immense knowledge of both music history and theory, and his history courses often seemed to be taught through a music theory lens. He is just a good, all-around ethical and moral person.

      Last but not least, I received much support from Arnold Miller, who developed the “Miller Method,” a cognitive–developmental systems approach for working with children on the autism spectrum. From my initial observations, it seemed like what he was doing with autistic children was…right. Later on, I found that one important aspect of his developmental-cognitive approach focuses on determining how a child with autism perceives his environment. In other words, figuring out how people with autism think. Arnold was very helpful and instrumental to me throughout my doctoral study in special education and remains so to this day.

       ON AUTISM

       My Autism Is Never “All Done”

      One life-changing event for me was when I realized that my autism was not something of the past. What I mean by that is, by the time I got out of grade school and finished my sessions with the psychiatrists, I thought autism was “all done.” In fact, up until my mid-30s, had someone asked if I was or am autistic, I would have said, “Well, that’s something of the past, when I was a young child…but not anymore.”

      It was not until I experienced difficulties with some relatively unstructured information on a doctoral qualifier examination that it occurred to me that this “autism” diagnosis of the past was “haunting” me now, in this very subtle but perhaps very significant way. I underwent a neuropsychological examination and found out that the childhood diagnosis and condition were indeed still with me. However, with intervention, maturation, and intense curiosity about the way things work, I was able to work around most of the challenges. I did receive some suggestions for mild accommodations to enable me to take the doctoral qualifier examination, but the school refused to make them. Rather than spending a lot of time with lawyers and a potential court hearing, I decided it best to refocus my doctoral studies on special education and the autism spectrum. However, I never thought of autism as being an excuse not to do something. Rather, understanding the characteristics of the condition as they affect me serve as a guide to help me do things better.

       Leading a Fulfilling Life

      From my initial presentation on autism in 1997 to my first book, Beyond the Wall: Personal Experiences with Autism and Asperger Syndrome, it has been my goal to combine academic, professional, and personal experiences on the autism spectrum, instead of touting the experience of “being autistic.” In other words, how can I employ my autistic characteristics—just as anyone on or off the spectrum should do with their own traits—to lead a fulfilling and productive life and help others realize they can do the same?

      I like to think of Beyond the Wall as employing an autobiographical structure in which to address the issues of education, accommodations, sensory issues, and a successful transition to adulthood in the areas of self-advocacy, relationships, continuing education, employment, and, in short, having a real life, working and doing things just like everyone else. One can be autistic rather than living a life of autism.

      Rather than attempting to make a career of talking about autism at conferences, I do the following. First, I serve as a professor of special education, developing and teaching a number of courses on a variety of subjects. Second, I write books about autism. The goal behind my books is to provide practical information about supporting individuals with autism in meeting and overcoming challenges. The same holds true for articles I write and for when I consult and do workshops and presentations about it. And third, I teach music lessons to children with autism. Engaging children in music therapy has many benefits. It provides them with an important avenue for developing interactions with others, as a musician and in the community (such as being a member of a local ensemble). Plus, music is just plain old fun, and fun is always a worthwhile pursuit.

      I believe I have made a career in autism and special education on the basis of hard work and conducting research in the field, combined with my own experiences of being on the autism spectrum. This is in contrast to what I see some people doing when they want to make a career out of being autistic. It may be a subtle distinction, but I think an important one to emphasize.

      CHAPTER 3

       ANNA MAGDALENA CHRISTIANSON

       Psychiatric Rehabilitation Practitioner

       ANNA MAGDALENA CHRISTIANSON,

       MS, CPSS, ETS, CPRP

      Age: 60

      Resides in: Berrien Springs, MI

      Occupation: Psychiatric rehabilitation practitioner and peer-support specialist at Riverwood Center, Berrien County Mental Health Authority

      Marital status: Married 38 years, with two children

       FROM TEMPLE:

      Anna feels that her life really began in her 50s, when she began working as a rehabilitation specialist. She largely deals with clients who have severe mental illness. Fortunately for Anna, she has a boss who is aware of her Asperger’s syndrome and who coaches her when she needs it. Anna draws inspiration from classical music more than from other people. She feels music at the core of her being,

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