LITMIR.BIZ

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few months. Just as we are heading out to the pub a few blocks away to meet some friends for a few ales, a cracking electrical storm hits, resulting in a thunderous downpour. Jeremy and I take one look outside before deciding against going out and settle in for a few quiet drinks and a movie at his place instead. It suits us, as we are both pretty knackered from burning the midnight oil. Although relieved that the stress of exams has passed, we haven’t built up enough sleep surplus to be in full party mode. As we settle ourselves on the lounge with cider and popcorn, Jeremy’s friend and fellow med student, Patrick, bursts through the door, dripping wet.

       ‘Mate, how’s the storm out there?’ He shouts the words over a crack of thunder that almost shakes the walls. ‘Oh, hi, Lexi, didn’t see you there. How’s things?’

       I’ve always thought Patrick is cute. He has a boyish charm, is just under six foot tall with quite a muscular build from playing rugby on the university team. And he calls me Lexi.

       ‘Hi, Pat. I’m well, thanks.’

       ‘Come in, mate. Looks like you copped it pretty bad out there, you’re saturated!’

       ‘Thanks. I was just heading to the pub to meet everyone and got caught in this. Hope you don’t mind.’

       ‘Not at all. We just decided to watch a movie, couldn’t be arsed going out in this weather so just slothing about instead.’

       After we put his stuff in the clothes dryer, he sits on the lounge with us, a white bath towel tied firmly around his hips. His tanned body looks good, tight with muscle from the many sit-ups and chin-ups and whatever else footballers do for training. Oh yes, you can call me Lexi, I muse … He opens his beer and we settle in for the movie.

       I sit at one end of the lounge with my legs draped over Jeremy’s lap and Patrick at the other. After our second round of drinks, Pat rolls up a joint. He goes to light up outside when Jeremy stops him.

       ‘No worries mate, it’s still pouring outside. Have it in here and we won’t have to stop the movie.’

       After he has a long drag, he hands it to Jeremy who also wastes no time in sending the essence of the joint directly to his lungs. He allows the impact to settle, takes a smaller drag and offers it to me. When I hesitate, Jeremy encourages me.

       ‘Go on, you’ve finished your exams, loosen up; we’re not going anywhere tonight and we have the next week off.’

       All true, so I take the joint from him and concentrate on doing it properly. It is always so embarrassing if I stuff it up; it seems everyone is willing to offer their expertise on the correct methodology for smoking a spliff. I exhale all air and slowly inhale the smoke deeply into my lungs, resisting the urge to cough and splutter it out. The sensation instantly goes to my brain as I continue to talk myself through the process — hold, hold, hold and very gently exhale. Jeremy removes the joint from my fingertips just before it falls, as my body goes momentarily limp and flops further into the corner of the lounge, feeling comfortably numb.

       I have one more drag and that’s enough for me. I’m content in my own little space for a while and I have no idea how much more the boys smoke or what they’ve been doing. My consciousness returns toward the end of the movie to see the boys lost in laughter at something. Not sure what, but it only takes me a minute before I find it hysterical as well. After the movie finishes, some music videos come on and Pat starts dancing around the room in his towel and Jeremy joins in. It is very funny to watch with the strobing lights of the TV and the sound of pelting rain in the background. At least no one would complain about the volume. Jeremy tries to get me off the lounge to dance with them but I have barricaded myself in the cushions instead.

       ‘No, you two look great up there by yourselves, let me enjoy being a voyeur.’

       This sends them into an array of ever more complicated dance manoeuvres that look completely ludicrous given the state they are in. They eventually disappear into the kitchen to return with a tray full of vodka shots. I shake my head.

       ‘Oh no, not after a spliff!’

       ‘Definitely after a spliff, Lexi, it’s the only way. After all, this is a post-exam downpour party,’ Pat declares to his own laughter and Jeremy endorses his sentiments with his own hysteria. They attempt to high five each other, but miss. This really does just keep getting funnier to watch and my stomach hurts from laughing.

       ‘Okay, Alex, down two shots now and we’ll let you stay on the lounge behind your barricade,’ Jeremy offers.

       ‘Absolutely. You can sit there like the gorgeous princess you are, in your comfy castle,’ Patrick adds.

       Pure genius — what a perfect solution. All I want at this moment is the soft comfort of the lounge and all the cushions I have collected over the course of the evening.

       ‘One?’ I should never have posed it as a question.

       ‘Two. One for Pat and one for me, then you’re safe on the lounge, for a while anyway.’

       ‘Done!’ I exclaim as if their logic makes perfect sense.

       ‘Cheers.’

       ‘To new experiences,’ Jeremy adds, as we all connect our glasses making eye contact, as was the custom between us.

       One shot, down. Second shot, down.

       ‘Jeez, vodka is strong when you have a double shot like that.’

       Patrick hands me some lemonade to help take the burn away. ‘Very considerate of you. Thanks, Pat.’

       ‘We’re here to serve, m’lady,’ he says with a cheeky, mischievous smile as he attempts a courteous bow.

       ‘And that pleases me no end,’ I agree with a wink.

       I’m thankful they leave me to wallow in my soft, smoky, vodka haze while they continue their dancing and parading around.

       When I look around the room again, I notice Jeremy, like Patrick, is only wearing a towel low on his waist.

       ‘Do you think you belong to a male harem? Look at you both. You look hilarious.’

       They do look absurd, but as I watch them I find myself noticing more and more how their muscles move and how firm their bodies are. I flush at the thought of having them in my own personal harem.

       Then suddenly, they are either side of me on the lounge stealing all of the pillows.

       ‘What are you doing?’ I holler at them. ‘Give them back, they’re mine, you can’t, it’s not fair.’

       They think this is hysterically funny as they strip me of my pillows and I try to retrieve them.

       ‘Come on, AB, you’ve been there for ages. The pillows can’t be more important to you than us, can they? Let them go …’

       And Jeremy then plants a kiss on my lips, his tongue penetrating my mouth.

       I am a bit stunned that he would do such a thing in front of Patrick. I look toward Patrick and notice the same lust in his eyes as there is in Jeremy’s.

       I notice too late that they give each other a quick nod and before I know it, Patrick has my legs and Jeremy my upper body and they carry me towards Jeremy’s bed.

       ‘Boys!’ I’m laughing and squirming as the heavy rain continues belting down. ‘What are you doing?’

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