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       Copyright

      William Collins

      An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd

      1 London Bridge Street

      London SE1 9GF

       WilliamCollinsBooks.com

      First published in Great Britain in 2018 by William Collins

      First published in the United States by HarperOne in 2018

      Copyright © Victoria Beeching

      Victoria Beeching asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988

      A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

      Designed by Yvonne Chan

      Front cover Design by Matthias Roberts

      Photos by Nicholas Dawkes

      “Above All Else” here by Vicky Beeching, copyright © 2001 Vineyard Songs (UK/Eire) (PRS) admin. in North America by Music Services.

      “Undivided Heart” here and here by Vicky Beeching, copyright © 2010 Thankyou Music (PRS) (adm. worldwide at CapitalCMGPublishing.com excluding Europe which is adm. by Integrity Music, part of the David C. Cook family. [email protected]) / Integrity Worship Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com). All rights reserved. Used by permission.

      Scripture quotations, unless otherwise noted, are taken from New Revised Standard Version Bible. Copyright © 1989 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

      All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission of the publishers.

      Source ISBN: 9780008182144

      Ebook Edition © June 2018 ISBN: 9780008182151

      Version: 2018-07-18

       Dedication

       This book is dedicated to the memory of Lizzie Lowe, a fourteen-year-old British girl who tragically took her own life in 2014 because she feared telling her Christian community that she was gay.

       Research statistics show that lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBTQ+) young people are far more likely to self-harm, suffer from mental-health issues, and contemplate suicide than their heterosexual peers.

       For Lizzie and the countless other LGBTQ+ young people who have ended their lives out of fear and shame: We will remember you. Your stories matter. We carry you in our hearts.

      Contents

       Cover

       Title Page

      Copyright

      Dedication

      Preface

      PART I: BEGINNINGS

      PART II: OXFORD

       Chapter Nine

       Chapter Ten

       Chapter Eleven

       Chapter Twelve

       Chapter Thirteen

       Chapter Fourteen

      PART III: AMERICA

       Chapter Fifteen

       Chapter Sixteen

       Chapter Seventeen

       Chapter Eighteen

       Chapter Nineteen

      PART IV: RETURNING HOME

       Chapter Twenty

       Chapter Twenty-One

       Chapter Twenty-Two

       Chapter Twenty-Three

       Chapter Twenty-Four

       Chapter Twenty-Five

      PART V: INTO THE UNKNOWN

       Chapter Twenty-Six

       Chapter Twenty-Seven

       Chapter Twenty-Eight

       Chapter Twenty-Nine

      

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