LITMIR.BIZ

      Out of the darkness stepped a figure dressed in a pith helmet, knee-high lace-up boots and a khaki coat. A plume of grey cigar smoke followed it.

      “Who the blazes is that?” demanded the Queen, struggling to see.

      “Oh n-no,” stammered Lankester.

      “Who is it?”

      “Lady Buckshot the big-game hunter, Your Majesty,” replied Lankester.

      “Oh no!” agreed the Queen.

      Disapproving murmurs echoed around the hall.

      “What is she doing here?” pressed the Queen.

      “Well, ma’am,” replied the hunter, “I shot and killed every single stuffed animal in the museum.”

      “Such a shame the animals weren’t armed, or they could have fired back,” hissed the Queen to Abdul, just loud enough for Buckshot to hear.

      “Ha! Ha!” Abdul couldn’t help but laugh.

      “It’s a shame this here monster is already dead,” began Buckshot. “It would have been my great pleasure to shoot it, right between the eyes.”

      “Well, erm, um, L-L-Lady Buckshot,” spluttered Lankester, “the mammoth as a species has long since been extinct.”

      “I am in the extinction business,” replied the hunter. “I would wipe out every last creature on Earth if I could.”

      “How delightful for you!” said the Queen sarcastically. “Now, where is this tea and cake?”

      Lankester leaped in. “Tea and cakes will now be served in the gallery. If you would follow me…”

      The Queen took Abdul’s arm, and she shuffled out of the hall.

      The great and the good all followed, which left Buckshot alone with the mammoth. From the top of the stairs, Elsie and Dotty watched as she marched right up to the front of the tank. There she mimed taking out a shotgun, loading it and firing. “BOOM!” She even provided a sound effect, before miming the mammoth’s brains splurging out.

      “Ha! Ha! Ha!” she chuckled to herself, before drifting back into the shadows.

      Now only Elsie and Dotty were left in the main hall.

      “I am trembling!” chattered Elsie, holding on to the balcony rail. The evil stench of Buckshot’s cigar smoke had snaked all the way up there.

      “Me too. Evil woman. She’s always dragging in some poor tiger or lion she’s shot, with a wicked grin on her face.”

      “So, now she’s gone, do we dare?” asked the girl.

      “Dare what?” replied the cleaning lady.

      “Do we dare to go down and take a closer look?”

      Dotty shook her head. “Ooh, Elsie, you’ll get me into deep doo-doo.”

      “Let’s just have a very, very, very quick look.”

      When the girl put it that way, it was hard to say no.

      “A very quick look?” asked Dotty.

      “A glance, really.”

      “A glimpse?”

      “Less than a glimpse, a peep.”

      “A peek?”

      “Exactly!” replied Elsie.

      Dotty sighed heavily. “All right, then. Let’s have a peek at this manmoth.”

      “I think it’s ‘mammoth’,” corrected Elsie.

      “Yes, ‘manmoth’! That’s what I said.”

      Elsie smiled, and pulled the lady along by her sleeve. “Dotty, come on…”

      

      “I am not sliding down the banister!” protested Dotty.

      “But it’s the fastest way down!” replied Elsie.

      Dotty was right to be reluctant. It was an awfully long way from the topmost floor of the museum to the bottommost.

      “In the time we’ve been arguing, we could already be at the bottom,” reasoned Elsie.

      The girl clambered on to the banister. Dotty sighed, then hitched up her skirt and joined her.

      “This is a very extremely bad idea,” said the lady.

      It was too late.

      WHOOSH!

      “Ouch. Me bottom cheeks are ablaze!” complained Dotty.

      “HOLD ON!” called out Elsie.

      Soon they ran out of banister.

      The girl landed on the floor.

      THUD!

      Dotty landed on top of her.

      THUDDER!

      Mesmerised, Elsie approached the Ice Monster. All that was separating the girl from a species that had become extinct thousands of years ago were a few inches of glass and ice.

      “Funny-looking thing,” muttered Dotty.

      “I think it’s beautiful,” whispered the girl. “It’s like the biggest cuddly toy in the whole wide world.”

      Dotty chuckled. “I’m not sure it would be all that cuddly if it was alive. Now come on. We need to get out of here before Mr Clout comes back.”

      The girl stood still.

      “Elsie? ELSIE?”

      The lady tugged at the little girl’s arm. “We need to go.”

      “I don’t want to leave it alone here,” replied Elsie.

      “You what?” Dotty couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

      “It looks sad.”

      “You’d look sad if you’d been dead for ten thousand years!”

      “Let me climb on your shoulders.”

      “You what?”

      “I need to take a closer look.”

      “Young lady, we need to get out of here now, before the Queen Her Majesty comes back.”

      “Quicker than a peek,” implored Elsie. “A peek-a-boo! I promise.”

      “No! Now come on!” With

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