LITMIR.BIZ

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towards her, hands flat on the wall behind her, his voice low, he stated urgently, ‘This is my life, Gellis! It’s not some Women’s Institute meeting where we’re discussing the price of jam! I’ve had four lost months. Not days, not weeks, but months! And, without you, I might lose years. Whatever I did, I don’t remember, I wish to God I did! I’m sorry if I hurt you! Sorry if I caused you pain, but you’re my only hope, Gellis.’

      ‘I can’t,’ she denied desperately.

      ‘You can! For God’s sake, I’m not asking you to go to the ends of the earth! Just across the damned Channel. I need to know, Gellis! Can’t you understand that? I need to know.’

      So do I, she thought bleakly. So do I.

      ‘Please!’

      And this was not a man who begged.

      ‘Please,’ he repeated.

      Holding his eyes for endless moments, she finally slumped, looked down, shuddered. Oh, God. It was still there—the feeling, the want, the need—and if she went with him...

      And if she didn’t? If she ran away now, spent the rest of her life hiding, she would never find out the truth. And she did need to know the truth. Needed to know why he had done what he had. But she didn’t know if she could bear to be in his company—not because of what he had done, but because of the way he could make her feel.

      Because she so desperately wanted him back. After all that had happened, she still wanted him. At first, in the café, when he had seemed so unfamiliar, so harsh and grating, there had been only shock, disbelief, panic. But now...

      ‘Just take me there,’ he urged. ‘Show me where we lived.’

      ‘The people there will show you,’ she argued desperately.

      ‘I don’t know the people there.’

      Closing her eyes in defeat, she wondered if it was a nightmare that would ever end. And he was too close, made her feel stifled, and she had to keep shutting her mind off in an effort not to think, feel—because she wanted to be held, comforted... Clenching her hands tight, she shook her head.

      ‘Just to Collioure, and then you can come back home,’ he encouraged.

      Home, she thought bleakly. Without him, it wasn’t a home at all. And the only way to get rid of him was to agree, wasn’t it? Otherwise he would stand here for ever, and for ever, persuading, undermining her resolution... ‘I can’t go for long,’ she muttered. And she couldn’t look at him. Not look into those beautiful eyes. Treacherous eyes. Eyes that had lied. As hers would be lying if she looked at him.

      ‘Thank you.’

      ‘I’ll meet you back here tomorrow.’

      And he laughed. A harsh, grating sound that sent a shiver through her.

      ‘Do I look like a fool, Gellis?’ he asked disparagingly. ‘We go today.’

      ‘Today? No! I can’t go today!’ She panicked. Glancing at her watch, glancing at anything in order not to have to look at him, she murmured stupidly, ‘It’s already gone eleven.’

      ‘So? The sooner we go, the sooner you can return.’ Well, it didn’t matter what she said, did it? Because she wasn’t intending to actually go! ‘All right. I’ll meet you back here in an hour.’

      ‘No.’

      ‘What?’

      ‘I said, no. You really think I believe you will come back? No, Gellis, I will come with you.’

      ‘No!’

      And he smiled. Like a wolf. ‘Yes.’

      Glancing frantically round, she found to her despair and astonishment that the pavement was empty.

      ‘Intending to scream?’ he asked softly and really rather menacingly.

      Could she? Dared she?

      His smile widened, showed even white teeth—teeth she had touched with her tongue—and she began to feel slightly sick. ‘You’re English,’ he whispered in hateful amusement. ‘And the English don’t scream, do they? Don’t like to attract attention to themselves. Give in gracefully, Gellis.’

      And that angered her—his mockery, his assumption. ‘No.’ Straightening her back, she forced one of his arms away. ‘No,’ she repeated.

      His smile dying, he searched her defiant eyes. ‘What did I do?’ he asked sombrely. ‘In God’s name, what did I do?’

      CHAPTER TWO

      ‘YOU left!’ Gellis shouted. ‘Hurt me. Sent a terse little note to say you wouldn’t be back!’

      Sébastien frowned. ‘No explanation? No reason?’

      ‘No.’

      ‘And so you don’t know why?’

      ‘No.’

      ‘But you would like to, wouldn’t you? That’s human nature—to want to know why. If you come with me, you might find out.’

      Yes, she might find out. And if it was something she didn’t want to hear? At least she would know. Not be forever speculating. There was the future to think of. A need to put it all behind her.

      Eyes too big in her white face, she slowly raised her lashes, forced herself to look at him. Really look at him. A hard face, but so very attractive. But no longer her husband’s face. Go with him? See their friends again? Be in his company? She didn’t know if she was tough enough.

      ‘You’re wavering,’ he said quietly.

      ‘Am I?’ she asked stonily. ‘All right,’ she decided.

      ‘I’ll come with you. But I can’t go for long—no more than a few days.’ No she couldn’t go for long.

      ‘Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord?’ he queried soberly.

      ‘What? No. I don’t want vengeance. Just to know the truth.’

      ‘As do I. Thank you,’ he added quietly. Straightening, he gave her an odd smile—quirky, a little bit wry. ‘Which way?’

      Keeping her heart hard, her mind still, she pointed to their right.

      He nodded. Hooking up his duffel bag and sailing jacket, he waited for her to lead the way.

      ‘Which is the nearest airport?’

      ‘Airport?’ she queried absently.

      ‘Yes, Gellis, airport.’

      She shook her head. ‘We aren’t flying.’

      ‘Aren’t we?’ he mocked softly.

      ‘No. We’ll go by car.’

      ‘That will take two days.’

      ‘I don’t care. I’m not flying.’

      ‘Why not?’

      ‘Because I don’t like to!’ she gritted.

      ‘Fair enough.’

      Surprised by his easy acceptance, she gave a bitter smile. This was madness.

      He halted, swung her to face him, stared down into her expressionless face, then registered the pain in her lovely eyes. Big and brown and lost. Like a doe. With a muffled sigh, he turned to walk on. ‘Where are we going?’

      ‘To my car.’

      He nodded. ‘You have a current passport?’

      ‘Yes.’

      He smiled. ‘Didn’t even think of lying, Gellis?’

      ‘Would it have done me any good?’

      He shook

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