LITMIR.BIZ

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settling himself into the chair opposite her. “Well, I mean I had the interview for the job, and the guy said he liked me. He’s supposed to call later this week.”

      “Doing what?” Madison asked. She had no idea how he’d made the little money he had.

      “Mechanic,” Charlie said. “I was always good with my hands. Sometimes it seemed like I only had to open the hood and the car would just tell me what was wrong with it.”

      “Really?”

      “Really. Except for that damn Mustang. I spent years of my life lying under that thing and I never could get it to run right.” He laughed, remembering. “I swear, on a cold clear night you could just hear it rusting.”

      A slight smile found its way to Madison’s face. “I remember that car. It was cherry red.”

      Charlie nodded. “Yes, it was. Beautiful, but useless. Though I did get it up and running once.” Charlie reached into a Styrofoam cooler beside his chair and pulled out a Dr Pepper. “I took you around the block a few times before it shit bricks.” Charlie shook his head at the thought and popped open his soda. “You want one? I can get you something else, if you’d rather. They got a vending machine. Ice, too.”

      “No,” Madison said. “Thank you.” She leaned forward a little and clutched her hands tightly in her lap. It was all well and good to share what few childhood memories they had, but she still needed answers. “Why, exactly, are you getting a job as a mechanic? I mean, Trevor is paying you. Isn’t he? To be on the show?”

      Charlie gazed over toward the window, and a shaft of light lit up one stubbled cheek. “Mr. Lord did make an offer, yes.” He took a drink of his soda. “But I wouldn’t take it.”

      Madison looked at him in surprise. Charlie had declined money to be on the show? But he so obviously needed it; he was living in this horrible place, and he didn’t even seem to own more than one pair of pants.

      “Don’t look so shocked, Sweetpea.” His voice was soft.

      “I’m not shocked,” Madison said, although of course she was. “I’m confused. Why did you say no?”

      Charlie’s blue eyes met hers. “I told him I wasn’t here to cash in on your success, only to get to know you. Sophie said she didn’t think you’d see me unless it was on-camera.”

      Sophie had been right about that, Madison thought. At least at first.

      “That made sense to me, because this is your life now,” Charlie went on. “But profiting off it just didn’t seem right. I’ll be okay. I’ll get that mechanic job, find a studio apartment. It’ll be enough. Hell, it’ll be more than perfect if I get to see you and your sister. I’ve waited more than a decade to be able to do that.”

      Though she might have been tempted, Madison didn’t ask him what it was that had kept him away so long. (He wasn’t in jail the whole time, so what was his excuse? Had he been shipped to Siberia? Had he suffered from temporary amnesia? Or was he always nearby, just not near enough for her to see?) She kept her mouth shut because she didn’t want to hurt his feelings. She just wanted him to keep talking.

      “Of all the things I regret in my life—and believe me, there are a lot,” Charlie said, “the biggest is not getting to watch you turn into the young woman you are.”

      Madison smiled wryly to herself. From the breast augmentations to the syringes of Restylane, from the hair dye to the personal training regimens, it had taken a lot to turn her into this particular young woman. She didn’t think Charlie would have actually wanted to witness any of that.

      He reached across the chipped, slightly sticky table and touched her arm. “I’m so proud of you,” he said. “You made it out of there. And what’s more, you made it here.”

      Madison turned away and looked through the dirty slice of window toward the freeway. Why was she tearing up?

      He left you, she reminded herself. He left you, and don’t you forget it.

      But she could tell herself that a thousand times and still there would be the small, hollow part of her that cried out to forgive him. To love him and be loved by him. He had come all the way to Los Angeles, and he had not taken any money for it. He wanted a relationship with Madison and her sister, and he was willing to live in a shithole like this to prove it.

      “I have to go,” Madison whispered. She stood and ran her hand over the back of her dress, smoothing out the wrinkles.

      “I’ll walk you to your car,” Charlie said. “It’s not a great neighborhood around here, as you may have noticed. It’s not a good idea for a young lady to walk alone.”

      Against her better judgment, Madison paused to wait for him, and her heart opened a bit more. Yes, she wanted a father. She wanted a father to compliment her and protect her and worry about her and be proud of her. “Okay,” Madison said. “Walk with me. I’m just down the parking lot a little ways.”

      When they got to her Lexus, Madison unlocked it and folded her legs inside. Charlie stood in front of the car, still holding his Dr Pepper can.

      “I don’t suppose you have much need for a mechanic with a new thing like this,” Charlie said. He ran his fingers along the gleaming hood. “Drive careful, all right?”

      Madison rolled down the window. “I wanted to tell you . . .” She paused, knowing what she had to say but unsure she was a big enough person to say it. “I need to tell you that I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.” She exhaled and the tightness in her chest released. “I spoke to Sue Beth and she told me about the letters.”

      Charlie nodded, and then he patted the hood of the car.

      “I didn’t know that you tried to see us or contact us.”

      “I wasn’t much of a father,” Charlie said. “And I’ve got to live with that the rest of my life. I wouldn’t expect you to really ever forgive me, but I just wanted you to know I tried. It was a poor try, a weak one, but it was all I could do back then.” Charlie lifted his arm and rubbed the sleeve of his shirt across his eyes.

      Madison nodded and turned on the ignition.

      Charlie took a step backward. “Will I see you again?” he called. “Maybe when you aren’t filming?”

      Madison smiled out the window. “Yeah,” she said. “You will.”

      

      “Can I bring you something to drink while you wait for your friend?” Kate asked the woman in hot-pink yoga pants.

      The woman blinked at her, smiling vaguely. She was obviously having a very hard time not looking at the PopTV cameras. No doubt Laurel was annoyed, but Kate thought it was funny: You could order people to pretend the camera crew wasn’t there; you could beg them to “act natural”—but as soon as the camera was rolling they stared into the lens like deer in headlights.

      Kate wondered if people were like that everywhere, or if it was a fascination unique to Los Angeles. “Pellegrino?” she suggested helpfully.

      The woman thought about this for such a long time that Kate was starting to think she hadn’t heard her. It was ten minutes before the end of her shift, and from the looks of it they were going to be the longest ten minutes of her life.

      “Um, what about the lemonade? Is that sugar-free?”

      “No, but it’s delicious,” Kate chirped.

      The woman threw up her hands. “What the heck! It’s Friday,” she said.

      Simone, one of her coworkers, sidled up to Kate as she poured a glass of lemonade. “If lemonade is her idea of letting loose on Friday, I do not even want to know what the rest of her

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