The Military Wives: Wherever You Are – Nicky’s Story - The Wives Military

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remember. I haven’t been here for six months.’

      We’ve both changed – not fundamentally, but in some ways. We have to work at finding our boundaries again. It’s a difficult balancing act: military wives always play second fiddle to their husbands’ careers, but they also have to be completely independent. I want him to know that I need him, but I also need to be able to cope without him.

      Twelve months after he came back from Iraq we moved to Catterick, and we knew when he went there that he would go to Afghanistan. When he told me, I had a terrible sinking feeling.

      Catterick was my first time in married quarters. Everyone was very friendly, but the first question was always: ‘Have you got children?’ When you say no they say everything from ‘Lucky you’ to ‘Your life must be so easy.’ Nobody knows how to deal with it, but you have to deal with it.

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