LITMIR.BIZ

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a postponement of the inevitable.

      ‘‘At least Mike didn’t come with you,’’ Beth said.

      ‘‘I promised him I would give him the abridged version when I got back.’’ Cindy plopped on the sofa and patted the cushion next to her. ‘‘Come on. Have a seat and start talking. I’m not leaving until you spill your guts.’’

      Beth glanced toward the stairs. At least both her kids were upstairs studying in their rooms. She wouldn’t have to bear the humiliation of them hearing about her date in more detail than she’d given them before. She settled on the sofa and thought about protesting that this was private and something she didn’t want to share. Unfortunately she’d teased Cindy as much or more when her friend had been single, and she’d wanted to know what was happening as Cindy and Mike had started getting involved. It was what she’d told Todd yesterday—payback.

      ‘‘There’s not much to tell,’’ Beth began.

      ‘‘I can’t tell you how much I don’t believe that,’’ Cindy said. ‘‘Come on. Spill it.’’

      Beth touched on the highlights from her aborted date with Todd. She described the limo drive into the city, the awkward conversation, the expensive restaurant.

      Cindy nodded sympathetically. ‘‘I would have hated being in a place that fancy. Did you feel really out of place?’’

      ‘‘Yes. The food on the menu was strange, the other customers were wearing designer clothes. I didn’t know what to do.’’

      ‘‘But you survived the experience.’’

      Beth felt a faint heat on her cheeks. ‘‘Um, not exactly.’’

      ‘‘What do you mean? Of course you survived. You’re sitting in front of me, looking completely normal.’’

      ‘‘It’s not that simple.’’ Beth folded her hands together in her lap. ‘‘I left him there. After we ordered drinks I realized the whole situation was crazy. Todd and I have nothing in common, I didn’t want to be there and…well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. I went into the rest room, wrote him a note and took a cab home.’’

      She was afraid to look at her friend, but when she finally did, she saw Cindy staring at her with a stunned expression on her face. Then she burst out laughing. ‘‘You stood him up?’’

      ‘‘It wasn’t exactly like that.’’

      ‘‘Oh, what was it like?’’ Cindy chuckled. ‘‘Mike is going to love this.’’

      Beth thought about asking her friend not to share the information, but she doubted it would do any good. ‘‘I’m not proud of what I did. I know it was rude and thoughtless. I just panicked. The dating thing is too hard. I’m too old to be going out with men. Todd was actually pretty nice, and when we were in the car, it wasn’t that difficult to talk to him, but in the restaurant I felt like everyone was staring at me.’’

      Cindy’s smile faded. ‘‘I’m sorry for laughing. You’re right. Starting over isn’t easy. I wish your first experience had been a little nicer, but at least you got started. The next time won’t be so bad.’’

      ‘‘I don’t think I should have a next time. I never learned the rules in high school, so I still don’t know them now. Besides, I’m not someone a man would be interested in.’’

      ‘‘Oh, please!’’ Cindy glared at her. ‘‘You’re intelligent, you have a great sense of humor, you’re attractive. What’s not to like?’’

      Her friend’s compliments made Beth feel a little better. ‘‘You’re kind to say so, but the fact is I’m nearly forty. That’s too old to be dating.’’

      ‘‘Why?’’

      ‘‘Todd only dates women in their twenties.’’

      Cindy’s gaze turned speculative. ‘‘How interesting.’’

      ‘‘What do you mean?’’

      ‘‘I was talking about dating in general, but you were talking specifically about Todd. You liked him.’’

      It wasn’t a question. ‘‘No. He was fine. Very nice.’’ And very nice looking. ‘‘But not my type.’’

      ‘‘As you informed me when I was freshly divorced, you have to actually be dating to have a type.’’

      ‘‘Fine. If I had a type it wouldn’t be Todd.’’

      ‘‘He’s not the only single guy around.’’

      ‘‘I know.’’ But he was the only one who had caught Beth’s attention. She reminded herself he was also the only one she’d ever been out with, too, which meant that she would probably be attracted to other men…assuming she ever met one and he asked her out.

      Cindy leaned toward her. ‘‘So if you ducked out on him, I guess I don’t have to ask about a good-night kiss.’’

      Beth swallowed. She hadn’t even thought about the possibility of kissing. If she had, she would never have been able to get into the limo in the first place. She wouldn’t know what to do if a man tried anything like that. Just the thought of it made her want to curl up and die. Having it actually happen would be worse.

      ‘‘No kissing, no significant touching,’’ she said.

      ‘‘How about insignificant touching.’’

      Beth glared at her friend. ‘‘Leave me alone. Nothing happened. I abandoned the poor man in a restaurant. It was not my finest hour and I just want to put the situation behind me.’’

      ‘‘Okay. You’ve made your point.’’ Cindy held up her hands in a gesture of surrender. ‘‘I take it you’re not going to see him again.’’

      Beth paused. ‘‘I am, but it’s not what you think.’’ Cindy’s hazel-green eyes widened slightly. ‘‘I’m not thinking anything.’’

      ‘‘Yes, you are. You’re thinking that he likes me or something, but he doesn’t. I sent him flowers to apologize for what I did. He came here yesterday because he wanted to hear me grovel in person. Then he suggested we go out and finish our date. I told him it was impossible. My life is full. I’m not interested in having a man.’’

      ‘‘But if you’re seeing him again, you did say yes to the date.’’

      ‘‘No. I told him I was busy next Saturday. I’ve got to do the planting, then there’s Matt’s baseball game followed by the swim party. After all that I’ll be way too exhausted to go out with anyone. When Todd didn’t believe me, I invited him to participate in all I have to do. If he has enough energy after that to go out, I said I would.’’ She shrugged. ‘‘He won’t want to. It’s going to be a long day.’’

      ‘‘Beth has a boyfriend,’’ Cindy sang under her breath. More heat flared on Beth’s cheeks. ‘‘I do not. He doesn’t like me. It’s not like that.’’

      ‘‘Oh, honey, it’s so exactly like that. He does like you. Why else would he bother?’’

      The question had kept Beth up most of the night. She picked at the hem of her shorts. ‘‘I’m all wrong for him. He likes perky young women. I’m a widowed mother of two. It doesn’t make sense.’’

      ‘‘Maybe he wants a change.’’

      ‘‘Maybe this is Be Kind To Widows And Orphans Month.’’

      ‘‘Does it matter?’’

      Beth looked at her friend’s face. She wanted to say that it didn’t matter, but if she was going to be honest with herself, she knew that it did. She didn’t want to be a mercy date for Todd. Being around him was exciting. For the first time in many months, she’d awakened

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