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to them.

      After living in Kamchatka for several years, I arrived on holiday in Volgograd, located amid even, like a table, steppes. I was offered the lower bunk bed. At night an earthquake woke me up and made me leave home in underwear. Some minutes later I realized that I was outside and returned home. There I found out that it was the person sleeping on the upper bed who turned on the other side during sleep. I had to explain to the puzzled relatives for a long while how to behave during an earthquake.

      Kamchatka residents are certain that animals feel the forthcoming earthquake better than people although it hasn’t been proved by scientists. That’s why locals keep various pets. It is believed that dogs start whining a few hours before the shocks, cats running on the walls as if treated with turpentine, and the tank fish dancing pirouettes. These superstitions are similar to stories about dolphins pushing sinking people toward the land. At least a half of the drowned people can’t boast the happy salvation as push them in the opposite direction.

      Now and then people spread rumor about the forthcoming catastrophic earthquake. Usually it happens in winter. Then some people stay in tents and cook on a fire. Scientists are skeptical about this information as even they can’t forecast earthquakes for sure. But they also move to the forest just in case.

      From time to time, the local TV channels show reports about unprecedented stores of condensed milk, padded jackets, and cast-iron stoves, stocked somewhere in case of a strong earthquake and guarded either by the militia or by Cossacks. These reserves are supposed to be given to the residents when they have no place to live. Some irresponsible citizens make attempts to find this blessed place with definitely mercenary interest on their mind.

      Once my friends and I were going for an hour in a snowcat to the base of Avacha Volcano. During the trip we enjoyed drinking fresh local beer. When I got out of it, I felt earth suddenly shake. I thought I’d drunk too much beer. Later, the radio said there was an earthquake.

      What should one do when they hear a din, the floor starts shaking, and the wineglasses in the sideboard melodically ring? To check if it’s a tractor that finally arrived to remove the snow in the yard. If it’s not a bulldozer, it’s good to get back in bed. If it keeps on shaking, it will be wise to take the bag with cans, medication, and the documents and stand in the opening of a bearing wall. A bearing wall is usually thicker and more reliable than others, provided the neighbor downstairs hasn’t destroyed it with a pneumatic hammer, doing illegal alterations in the flat. The most desperate residents take a running jump out of the window. However, the information about a successful landing after a jump out of the window located on the floor above the third level can hardly be considered credible.

      And now it becomes clear to visitors why the choice of a design decision is limited in Kamchatka. There are three types of buildings on the peninsula. Take a match box and place it on a side – it’s an apartment house. Place it on a wide side – it’s a school. Turn it on a short edge – it’s an administrative building. All buildings are made with the increased safety margin. Once, my wife asked me to hang a picture. It seems to have been still life. Having broken three electric drill’s borers against reinforcement rods hidden inside the wall, I quit that idea. The concrete wall looked after the attempts to make a hole in it as if somebody shot in it from a large-caliber machine gun.

      At times, a well-worn van with a metal reproducer on its top, like the one in pre-war French movies, runs on roads of the city. A snuffling voice from the speaker calls for calm, advises not to plug in electric devices, and slowly move to the cemetery. It’s the way the emergency training is carried out.

      Years ago we bought our first “Dolby Surround” home theater. We acquired a DVD about the work of CNN journalists during the war in Iraq. We invited guests and warned them not to be scared of unusual sound effects. The episode with Bagdad being bombarded was especially impressive. Roar, blasts, din. “The system is awesome! It even makes walls shudder”, – one guest said. Later, we found out that it was a real earthquake.

      The Kamchatka visitors who have accidentally gone through earth tremor look in astonishment at the locals obstinately ignoring the cataclysm. It seems only then Kamchatka beauties become less important for them, and the question “Why does the government pay people an increment to their salary?” is no longer forefront in their mind.

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