Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Volume 57, No. 354, April 1845 - Various

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Bashful Constant, and Sir Harry Lovewit, show at once their respective peculiarities – as do Colonel Tornado, Tempest, Hurricane, Absolute, Rapid, and a thousand others that I have met with in my reading. But the thing which astonished me most of all was, that in this great mercantile nation, a merchant is very little appreciated unless he is in debt or a cheat; but the hero of most of the histories, if he is of a mercantile family, is over head and ears in the books of Jew usurers, and has left the respectable circle of his equals in rank, and spends his time and constitution in the gaieties of the lords and ladies. And that this has long been the case, is proved by old plays and new ones. There is a play in the oldest-looking of the volumes I possess, called, "How to grow Rich," which shows the style of manners in this respect forty or fifty years ago; and I will translate the beginning of it, that you may see a real picture of English society with your own eyes.

      Mr Warford, the nephew of Mr Smalltrade, a banker, is in conversation with Mr Plainly, the head clerk: —

      "Plainly.– Nay, do not think me curious or impertinent, Mr Warford. I have lived so long with you and your uncle, that I cannot see you unhappy without enquiring the cause.

      "Warford.– My uncle is himself the cause. His weakness and credulity will undo us all.

      "Plainly.– Excuse me, sir; but I'm afraid the young lady now on a visit at our banking-house, the charming Lady Henrietta, has she not made a very deep impression?

      "Warford.– To confess the truth she has; and though, from my inferior situation in life, I can never aspire to the gaining of her affections, she may still have to thank me for saving her from ruin.

      "Plainly.– From ruin, sir?

      "Warford.– Ay; she is now on the very brink of it. When her father, Lord Orville, went abroad for his health, he gave her a fortune of eight thousand pounds, and left her to the care of her uncle, Sir Thomas Roundhead. At his country seat Mr Smalltrade met with her, and, being banker to her father, he thought it his duty to invite her to his house.

      "Plainly.– And she had no sooner entered it than she became acquainted with Sir Charles and Miss Dazzle? I suspect their infamous designs.

      "Warford.– Yes, Plainly, when Miss Dazzle has robbed her of her fortune at the gaming-table, Sir Charles is to attempt to deprive her of her honour; but if I don't shame and expose them! Oh, think of the heartfelt satisfaction in saving such a woman as Lady Henrietta! 'Tis true most of her fortune is already lost, and Sir Thomas is so offended at her conduct, that, wanting an heir to his estate, he has adopted his god-daughter Rosa."

      In the next page we are shown the mode in which banking was carried on in country towns by persons who had the daughters of lords visiting them – who have gone abroad for their health, and left then such uncountable heaps of sycee silver.

      "Smalltrade.– There is nothing like a snug country bank.

      [Enter a servant.

      "Servant.– I want change for this draft of Sir Harry Hockley's.

      "Smalltrade.– Very well, how much is it for?

      "Servant.– A hundred pounds.

      "Smalltrade.– What?

      "Servant.– A hundred pounds.

      "Smalltrade.– Mercy on me! you've set me all in a tremble. Draw on a country bank for a hundred pounds! – why, does your master suppose himself drawing on the bank of Amsterdam?

      "Plainly.– True, sir; and, if you recollect, we had a large run upon us yesterday.

      "Smalltrade.– So we had – a very large run! Sir Thomas Roundhead drew in one draft for the enormous sum of twenty-five pounds, and here's your master draws for a hundred. Talk of a country bank! the Bank of England couldn't stand this.

      "Servant.– I can't tell, sir; Sir Harry said he had ten times the money in your hands.

      "Smalltrade.– So he has, and what then? Doesn't he place money in my hands that it may be safe; and if he is to draw it out in large sums, that is, if he is to get it out when he wants it, where would be the use of a banker?"

      In a succeeding scene, Miss Dazzle meets her brother Sir Charles, and says, —

      "Welcome from London, brother! I have just left the idol of your heart, the charming Henrietta. As usual, the banker's nephew was attending her.

      "Sir Charles.– Ay, ay, it's all pretty plain, but I won't be scandalous.

      "Miss Dazzle.– Well, if she's his to-day she'll be yours to-morrow. I have seen Mr Smalltrade; he talks of becoming a partner; and, if you play your cards well, Lady Henrietta will be completely in your power.

      "Sir Charles.– Yes, for when I've won all her money I can be generous enough to become her protector. Well, sister, we shall ruin them all."

      It will be seen from this, O Cho-Ling-Kyang! that sirs and their sisters unite with country bankers in setting up a gaming-house – and that the method of treating a lord's daughter, is to ruin her first at cards, and in character afterwards. The picture of private life which I have quoted, is from the works of one Frederick Reynolds; the play was acted with the greatest applause, and has passed through a great many editions. So there can be no doubt of its presenting a true image of the usual course of events in this great and wonderful nation.

      In another volume I find a similar representation. It is called, "The Way to get Married," and is written by one Thomas Morton. I will translate some passages for you, and you will see that the English are very different people in their own country from what they are in their counting-houses at Hong-Kong.

      There was a gentleman of the name of Toby Allspice, a grocer, who was sheriff of his county, and expected by the death of an old maid, Miss Sarah Sapless, to succeed to thirty thousand pounds. He has a daughter who is very anxious to be "stylish," and marry a "lord" or a "sir," if she can.

      To Mr Allspice's town goes a London merchant of the name of Dashall, who receives a letter on his arrival, and reads it to the whole of the audience: —

      "Dashall, (reads). – 'Dear Dashall, all's up. Transfer swears if you don't settle your beer account in a week, he'll blackboard you. Affectionate enquiries are making after you at Lloyd's; and to crown all, hops were so lively last market, that there is already a loss of thousands on that scheme. Nothing can save you but the ready. Yours,

"'Tim Tick.

      "'N.B. – Green peas were yesterday sold at Leadenhall market at ninepence a-peck, so your bet of three thousand pounds on that event is lost.' – So! Lurched every way; stocks, insurance, hops, hazard, and green peas, all over the left shoulder; and then, like a flat, I must get pigeoned at Faro by ladies of quality, for the swagger of saying, 'The Duchess and I were curst jolly last night.' But confusion to despair! I'm no flincher. If I can but humbug Allspice out of a few thousands, and marry his daughter, I shall cut a gay figure, and make a splash yet.

      "Waiter, (without.) – A room for Lady Sorrel.

      "Dashall.– What the devil brings her here? Old and ugly as she is, I'll take decent odds that 'tis an intrigue.

      [Enter Lady Sorrel.

      "Lady Sorrel.– Inform my cousin Caustic I'm here. Ah, Dashall! I suppose the warm weather has driven you from town?

      "Dashall.– True, London was certainly too hot for me, but how could your ladyship leave the fascination of play?

      "Lady Sorrel.– Hush! that's not my rural character. I always assimilate. The fact is, Dick, I have here a strange, plain-spoken, worthy, and wealthy relation; he gives me considerable sums to distribute in London to the needy, which I lose in play to people of fashion; and you'll allow that is giving them to the needy, and fulfilling the worthy donor's intentions. – Ha! ha!

      "Dashall.– Then you are not here because your favourite, young Tangent, is arrived? – Eh?

      "Lady

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