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Michael’s Ark. Alex Nuller
Читать онлайн.Название Michael’s Ark
Год выпуска 0
isbn 9785447481940
Автор произведения Alex Nuller
Издательство Издательские решения
Wolf carefully inspected the ship, looking at every corner. He sucked on his pipe and growled “Double down on that snatch block!37” It looked as if the inspection would wrap up peacefully. But then Wolf opened up the pillow hatch, looked in the hold, pulled his pipe from his mouth and rumbled “Shiver me timbers! What’s a great big horned beast doing on my ship?”
Terrified, Moosie stuck his nose out from the hold, and whispered “I’m not a beast, I’m Moosie”.
Wolf barked:
“Who? Squids in me bilge! Speak up, mate! I can’t hear you!”
“Moose, I’m a m-m-moose,” Moosie murmured almost inaudibly.
Wolf dropped his pipe from his paw, rolled his eyes and guffawed:
“A moose? You’re a moose? Well, skewer me with a swordfish! This is a moose? Ha ha ha!”
“What do you find so humorous about our horned friend?” Camel stepped up on Moosie’s behalf. “He’s a typical example of a young moose. What is it about him that you find unsatisfactory?”
But Wolf couldn’t answer Camel because he was still laughing. Finally he got tired and dropped on the deck. “And what manner of beast are you to be sailing the high seas?”
“I’m little white Moosie,” Moosie said, shivering from fright.
Stick a horn on me nose and call me a narwhal! I know what a REAL moose looks like. Before I went to sea, I lived with my pack in the forest. I saw moose all the time. They were big and brave, and dangerous in a fight! Even we wolves respected them. But this beast looks more like a horned rabbit than any moose I ever saw!”
Moosie’s horns drooped. “I’m little white Moosie”, he repeated, barely audible.
Dreamer came to Moosie’s defence.
“Honourable captain,” he began unhurriedly, “it may very well be that our antlered friend is not prototypical of his breed. However, that does not give you the right to deride and abuse his animalistic dignity.”
Mike came to Moosie’s support too. “Mr. Wolf”, he said, “we respect you as a brave and wise captain, but don’t make fun of my friends again, or I’ll have to put you back in the cupboard.”
At a loss of what to say, Wolf opened his mouth and then closed it, just like before, and then he opened it again and wheezed:
“A fid38 in me ear, if I meant to insult him! I’ve seen hundreds of moose, but I never saw a moose like this one. I didn’t even know they existed!”
“If one is uncertain about something, it is best to be reserved in displays of emotion!” Dreamer said. “Furthermore, our antlered friend fears that he may become the object of your gastronomic preferences39. You should categorically dispel his misgivings40.
“What does he fear?” Wolf asked, confused.
“Moosie is afraid that you’ll eat him!” Mike explained.
Pop-eyed, Wolf twisted his muzzle and cried:
“May a swordfish stab me in the ribs, and the sharks eat me liver! What do you take me for? I’m an old Sea Wolf, a veteran of Trafalgar and Livorno41, a knight of the Legion of Horror42. I’m a captain, and I don’t devour my shipmates! If I’m a wolf that still doesn’t mean I…, I… well, I’m a vegetarian43, if you want to know!
“What?!” Mike, Camel and Moosie said all together. “A vegetarian wolf?!”
Wolf felt that he had already said too much. But he gathered himself up with feeling and dignity, and said:
“Yes, it’s my rule of life! I don’t eat anybody!”
“That’s great!” Moosie exclaimed. “A vegetarian wolf is the best wolf in the world! Now I’m not afraid to sail with you.”
“Yes…” pronounced Camel, “‘O tempora! O mores!’, which translated from the Latin means ‘Oh, the times! Oh, the morals!’ I hope at least that Wolf doesn’t eat cactus yet.”
Chapter 6. Getting the Name
“Wait!” Mike said, “what are we going to name our ship?”
“Indeed!” wheezed Captain Wolf, “you mean she hasn’t got a name?”
“No ship can exist without a name!” Camel observed.
Mike thought about it. He had read a lot of books about ships and the sea that had names of lots of different ships, but none of them seemed to fit.
“Maybe we should name her Poseidon?” Mike suggested. “After all, he’s the god of the sea!”
“Such a name is hardly suitable for a small brig”, Camel retorted.
“Then let’s call her Fair Wind!” Mike said.
“Fair winds in me gob!” Captain Wolf said, disagreeing. “With a name like that ye’ll have to whistle for a fair wind!44”
“But that’s just a superstition!45” Mike retorted.
“You can think what ye like, but I’m not setting sail on no ship named Fair Wind!” Wolf said, unexpectedly adding: “And by the way, ships are often named in honour of famous captains. Why don’t we call her the Sea Wolf?”
“No!” Moosie said, terrified, “I’m not sailing on a wolf, even if it’s a sea wolf. It’s too scary!”
“The name does indeed sound exceedingly rapacious,46” Camel said, supporting Moosie, “furthermore, in the event of any untoward incident, we would look foolish. Think of the newspaper headlines: ‘Sea Wolf Loses Control, Founders on Reef off South America.’”
“Bite yer tongue!” Captain Wolf swore, but he didn’t insist on the name any longer.
“Then let’s name the ship the Sea Moose!” Moosie said. “I’m not afraid of anybody laughing at me, as long as we don’t drown!”
“You may as well call her the Sea Camel,” Captain Wolf parried, “at least then we’ll win a prize for the silliest name.”
“It appears to me that we are forgetting our young friend,” said Camel, pointing his hoof at Mike, “the construction of the ship was his idea.”
Mike felt his cheeks turn red.
“If anybody is worthy of the honour to have the ship named after him, it is our young friend,” Camel continued.
All the animals agreed to this proposal, but they got no further; they couldn’t call her Captain Mike, because Mike wasn’t the captain. A number of exotic names were suggested: Floating Mike, Mike and Company, Young Friend of Animals, but none of them seemed right.
“Hold on!” Camel said. “This reminds me of something! In my youth I read a quite illuminating book. A man gathered a collection of various animals on his ship so that they wouldn’t drown.”
“And they didn’t drown?” Mike asked.
“No,” Camel answered,
Different types of rigging on a ship.
A device to pull things up using ropes that can be opened on the side.
A big spike used to work lines on a ship.
What the wolf likes to eat.
Make sure that he doesn’t have to worry.
Famous naval battles that took place very many years ago.
Wolf confused top French award “Legion of Honor”. But it’s unlikely that he ever got it
Wolf doesn’t eat meat.
Sailors say that whistling on board ship is bad luck, except when there’s no wind; then you have to whistle to make the wind come up.
Like when a black cat crosses your path, or walking under a ladder.
Like an animal that preys on other animals.