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knowing what to say…

      And you – my golden-haired prince,

      A poet’s dream and poems,

      And I acted like a fool,

      About this meeting – all, without words…”

      White Light

      Alex opened the coach’s office door and appeared before Marianna in all his glory. Marianna stood up from the bench and looked at Alex, who was slightly to the side. His face was poorly lit due to the light in the room. Marianna seemed to barely breathe; she was thin, fragile, and defenseless in that tight blue blouse, which barely covered her soul and emaciated body. Her soul was open and exposed, it seemed like anyone could step on it and it would break, and the feeling was delicate and shameful, visible to all. Suddenly, from Alex’s direction, Marianna saw a white beam, a gentle white light connecting her with Alex, flowing from him towards her. Marianna subconsciously recognized it as divine light.

      “How are you?” Alex took steps towards Marianna, looking at her and smiling.

      Marianna rushed as if towards Alex and closer to the source of the light, but suddenly saw the Head Coach come out of the room on the left, catching her off guard, so to speak. His face looked sternly with judgment. This was the Apostle Peter. Marianna sat back down on the bench and no longer tried to approach Alex. She thought about that white light she saw today in the evening, reviewing an encyclopedia about the light spectrum. Scientific sources spoke of different colors, but for some reason, she saw white light, like a beam from a spotlight.

      Eagle Nose

      “I also want to do Jiu-Jitsu!” Albert said one day. “Mom, Nikolash goes, and he’s already brought home so many medals.”

      “Son, it’s too late for you to start that now. Kids start there at five years old.”

      “Well, maybe he can try…” Marianna thought. “I’ll talk to the coach, and you can go on weekends. It’s a paid activity anyway.”

      Marianna brought Albert to the Jiu-Jitsu club. Alex came out of the coach’s office and approached Albert.

      “Oh! Hi!” he said, shaking his hand.

      Alex showed him where the locker room was and took Albert to the hall. Marianna sat in the corridor, waiting for the training to end.

      Finally, tired of sitting in one position, she went down to the basement where the gym was located. I’m worried about Albert… Everyone there is experienced, and it’s his first time.

      Marianna stood at the gym door and could see Albert doing exercises. And the white uniform came in handy – Marianna thought, looking at her son. Sparring began. Marianna saw the coach pair Albert with small but experienced fighters. Opposite Albert was a little girl, briskly delivering blows. Albert dodged. The girl attacked harder and struck Albert in the face. Albert covered his nose with his hand, and Marianna saw red blood flowing down Albert’s white uniform. The coach led Albert out of the hall, apologizing: “She’s a terminator, not just a girl! Put ice on it in the medical room. How did this happen…” Marianna fretted. Why did I bring Albert here? He’s unskilled, slow…

      Marianna noticed Albert’s nose was crooked, now with a bump, resembling a beak. She started to realize that his nose was broken. But nothing could be done…

      ***

      Soon, the story of Jiu-Jitsu was forgotten, only the crooked, bump-nosed Albert reminded of it. Albert became seriously interested in hockey and hurried to the ice rink almost every day. Marianna noticed how handsome Albert looked in that hockey uniform on the ice…

      Baba Yaga

      Marianna met Valya at the Ice Arena. Valya also brought her grandson to hockey. Although Valya was older than Marianna, she had a special energy, joking and cheering everyone up. When she spotted Marianna, she waved from afar. Marianna liked her too. Valya also visited Marianna in the hospital, sometimes to get a medical certificate for her grandson or for advice, especially if Valya had a backache.

      Marianna’s first day back at work after returning from Egypt was tough. She had to wear a white coat and attend to patients even though she wasn’t feeling great. The door to the office slowly opened. Marianna saw a huge nose with a hairy wart and an old lady’s face poking through the door.

      “Baba Yaga!” Marianna whispered to herself.

      Then Valya’s whole body appeared in the doorway.

      “Hello! So glad to see you, dear!”

      Baba Yaga walked up to Marianna’s desk and kissed the top of her head. Then she talked about her problems, and Marianna helped her.

      “Alright, I’ll be going now, Grandpa is waiting!”

      “Is that Ivan, your grandpa?”

      “Oh, come on, it’s Stepan! I have a new husband now!”

      Baba Yaga creaked the door and left, hunched over with her nose forward.

      Marianna pondered, “I wonder how many times Baba Yaga has been married? Probably three times, like Valya.”

      ***

      In the evening, a post from Baba Yaga appeared on Marianna’s Facebook4 timeline with a picture and a caption.

      Mariana read: “Read the Gospel!”

      I’m sick

      Leaves entwined in braids,

      Why should I grieve?

      It’s October now,

      How long to wait indeed…

      How I wait for you,

      How I long – it’s true,

      You – my dream so dear,

      Long-awaited too.

      I am sick – because of you,

      I am sick.

      You – my love and disease,

      You – my betrothed.

      October rustles leaves so dry,

      Why feel dismay?

      I am ill – because of you,

      And I like it this way.

      Headache grips, oh, so tight,

      What more can I say?

      I’ll call you right now,

      Better than to write.

      I’ll dial your number now,

      As I’m unwell.

      You – my love and vow,

      With eyes so grey.

      My Death

      To write or not to write to Alex?

      Why… I won’t. The phone lies nearby on the table. Marianna feels as if some force compels her hand to rise, overcoming resistance; her hand trembles as she picks up the phone. She nervously opens Viber and sends a smiley face to Alex. As if some higher power is controlling Marianna’s hand like a puppet on strings, making the doll do what Marianna does not want. In response,

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<p>4</p>

Extremist organisation banned in the Russian Federation. hereinafter