LITMIR.BIZ

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myself onto a bar stool, just in case.

      «She signed up for a cheerleading practice and didn’t tell me.» Iris pointed at Evana with a dramatic gesture. «I wanted to sign up too. I’m the one with a great fit and a good voice to cheer here.»

      That was only partially true. Since she was born, Iris has been gifted with a very loud, high-pitched voice. Sounds she was making demanding food could be used as a weapon of mass destruction if recorded.

      «Evana, how did you sign up for the practice?» I asked my stepdaughter.

      «Dad did it, I don’t know how,» Evana replied, looking very upset. «I’m sorry. I didn’t know Iris wanted to do cheerleading also. It’s something I have wanted to do for the last couple of years, but Dad was busy, but this year he says I should start.»

      «Mom, do you hear that? A cheerleading practice! I get nothing in this family.» My sweet angel ran out of the kitchen sobbing.

      «Call my coach. Maybe she needs another student,» offered generous Evana. I, myself, decided to talk to Iris about such family values as her stepfather’s wealth, and her right to get a piece without tears and hysteria.

      My talk helped, and we had a relatively relaxing dinner on the porch next to the grill, consuming a great amount of barbequed chicken and prime ribs. Our shepherd sat next to me, breathing hot and drooling on my leg. I gave him a piece of meat when Alex turned his back to me.

      «No feeding the dog at the table,» Alexander said, without looking.

      «Maybe Rachel should take a nap,» Larissa suddenly suggested to my husband. «She woke up in the middle of the night, went outside and was absent for about an hour. She might have insomnia. I worry about her.»

      Alexander looked at me with a newfound interest. The secret about my investigating job burned a hole in me, but the story of the toilet tanks held me back.

      «Elvis woke me up,» I lied, petting the dog’s silky fur. «He had an upset stomach and needed a long walk.»

      «Elvis should be on a diet and eat only the vet-recommended food,» Alexander said wearily. «And you keep feeding him human food at the table.»

      Yeah, right! What have dogs been eating for the last ten thousand years? Human food! They stuck around us because of pancakes and prime ribs. However, I didn’t plan to argue with my husband tonight, but would simply get into my cozy bed and cuddle up with the new Janet Evanovich mystery novel.

      Past midnight, I suddenly remembered to call Debbie to tell her about the polygraph test tomorrow. I grabbed the receiver, locked myself up in the bathroom, and turned on the water, so my hubby wouldn’t hear me talking.

      Debbie sounded surprised, at the least.

      «A polygraph test? Do you mean a „lie detector“? Why do I have to take it? Gamma Woods claimed that the money and jewelry were stolen from her when she was getting her stuff ready to move out of the office. Did you read my Irregular Incident Report?»

      No, I didn’t. Joe neglected to introduce me to it.

      «Debbie, I know, it’s terribly unfair, and it shouldn’t have happened to you. But it happened. That’s why we are working for you, to help you become whole again. Of course, it’s unfair that you have to take this polygraph test, but this is a powerful tool to show people you’re not a liar. By the way, the judge might order this Gamma Woods woman to take the test as well. Tomorrow morning at twelve, I will pick you up and take you there.»

      Disconnecting, I sighed with relief. The last thing would be for her to find out that I didn’t know where the office of Planet Security was.

      In deep thoughts, I opened the bathroom door and collided with Alex.

      «Are you taking a shower with the phone?» He asked carefully.

      «No, I was just checking my e-mails.»

      «It’s a regular phone. It doesn’t have a wireless network connection.»

      «That’s why I couldn’t check anything,» I said coolly, and congratulated myself on a sharp comeback. In the kitchen, I warmed up milk and had it with honey: my best way to get asleep fast.

      In the morning, I let myself stay in bed longer than usual, preparing for an important day. Larissa did all the morning routine for the girls and Alexander. In the morning, I let myself stay in bed a bit longer than usual, preparing for an important day. Larissa did all the morning routine for the girls and Alexander. Since I no longer had to wake up at the break of dawn to work and see the kids off to school, I stayed in bed as long as it was humanly possible.

      I called Joe’s office at a quarter of nine, but nobody answered. He didn’t pick up his home phone, either. His cell phone was off. He was probably wearing off his pants in court. Cursing at his cheapness and reluctance to get a secretary, I left two voice messages and sent a text message to his mobile that I needed the exact time and place of the polygraph test.

      In the kitchen, our new housemaid, Claudia Peres, was washing the floors. I tiptoed all the way across the wet floor to get my coffee, when I heard an entrance door opening and closing. Next, Elvis galloped into the kitchen, carrying a new toy in his mouth. Somehow, he missed my waking up and tried to make up for it now, jumping at me and offering to share the joy with him. When a hundred pounds of Elvis’s muscles hit me in the stomach, I slipped on the wet floor and fell down. The quick-minded dog evaluated my brave movement for a second, and then put his new toy on my face, as I was sitting up. The toy, shaped like a life preserver, slid around my head and dropped on my shoulders.

      «Oh,» Claudia said, entering the kitchen with a brush and a bucket of water. She was a corpulent blonde Latino with a big nose and thick mustache. «Madam, take it off. You shouldn’t put garbage on. This stupid dog took it from our front lawn. The other night, somebody dumped old toilets on our property. Jesus Maria, these people have no shame.»

      «Rachel, how are you today, dear?» Larissa came in, dressed in a long silk jacket and skirt of pale colors. My head mysteriously got stuck inside the ring, and our substitute grandmother rushed to help me take it off. She elegantly negotiated the wet tile floor with her kitten heel shoes.

      «Oh,» she exclaimed, turning Elvis’s toy over. «It looks like a toilet seat. It’s used and very dirty. Why would you hang it on your neck, Rachel?»

      «Who let the dog out?» I asked indignantly.

      «The dog ran away when Joe stopped by. He said he was admiring our landscaping, and asked if we started renovation of the house, because of the toilets sitting there on the front lawn.» The old lady poured hot water for her tea and took a piece of paper from her pocket. «He left a note for you.»

      The note said: 555 Walnut Street at 2 pm.

      In the next hour, I took a shower and got dressed for the trip. I wasn’t even angry at my boss for his antics. We rarely, if ever, use our front driveway, because it takes too long to wait for the gates to open. This is the worst he could do, I thought. I will get back at him by solving the case and discovering the best material witnesses. The embryo of every lawsuit is greed, jealousy, revenge, or fear. Gamma and Debbie have just met, so there is no jealousy involved. Gamma got an offer for a different job with the company, so it’s not greed or revenge that moved Gamma to destroy her new co-worker. Then, what we have left is fear. Gamma is afraid of something. It’s plausible that Debbie, during her first orientation week, came across information damaging to Gamma. It was something that made Gamma believe that it was easier to get rid of the woman than to let her stay with the company with this information.

      In the hallway, Claudia stopped me and asked me to call the township and ask them to remove the trash off the lawn. With a promise to call, I jumped into my Jaguar and took off, before something else came up.

      I was driving along Pike Street towards Debbie’s house when somebody honked

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