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System life. How to organize life to cope with uncertainty and achieve results without burnout. Semyon Kolosov
Читать онлайн.Название System life. How to organize life to cope with uncertainty and achieve results without burnout
Год выпуска 0
isbn 9785006025400
Автор произведения Semyon Kolosov
Издательство Издательские решения
It is necessary to analyze motivation, since most people are stuck in the zone of dissatisfaction with the comfort zone. Basic needs are fulfilled, there are not so many annoying stimuli, but there is no motivation either. It’s like a comfort zone, but the awareness of how it should be does not allow you to enjoy what you have. The parable about the dog on the nail describes this condition well.
One day a man was walking past a certain house and saw an old woman in a rocking chair, an old man reading a newspaper was rocking in an armchair next to her, and a dog was lying on the porch between them and whining, as if in pain. Passing by, the man wondered to himself why the dog was whining.
The next day he was walking past this house again. He saw an elderly couple in rocking chairs and a dog lying between them and making the same plaintive sound. The puzzled man promised himself that if the dog whines tomorrow, he would ask the elderly couple about it.
On the third day, to his misfortune, he saw the same scene: the old woman was rocking in a chair, the old man was reading a newspaper, and the dog was whining plaintively in its place. He couldn’t take it anymore.
«Excuse me, ma’am,» he said to the old lady.
– What happened to your dog?
– To her? – asked the old lady. – She’s lying on a nail.
Confused by her answer, the man asked:
– If she’s lying on a nail and it hurts, why doesn’t she just get up?
The old lady smiled and said in a friendly, affectionate voice:
– So, my dear, it hurts her enough to whine, but not enough to move from her place.
Many people are also in a situation where everything is fine, they want to do even better, but there is no motivation to act. Or not good enough, but it has not yet reached the incentives when security will be affected. A person does not act for three reasons: he does not want to, cannot, or does not know how. If, after quoting Andrew Grove from the book «High-Performance Management», the last two reasons do not seem so complicated, then only the first one remains. Your desire.
«If this person’s life depended on doing this job, would he be able to do it? If the answer is positive, then this person has no motivation; if negative, he is not capable»
Being bombarded with information noise and society, a person cannot consciously think about his desires. Why dig if you can already see what you need. You can see what kind of people are trending, and who everyone loves. Therefore, someone is happy, and someone makes unsuccessful attempts to motivate themselves for other people’s goals and googles «how to overcome procrastination.» Procrastination was invented by the same people who are taught to look for motivation in violent ways. Why come up with such a complicated word for the process when you can’t find the strength and energy for a job that you don’t want to do? It’s not procrastination – it’s you who don’t want to do something, don’t know how, can’t do it, or can’t avoid it. Deal with desires – there will be no problems with motivation, procrastination and purpose. There are a number of factors and processes that help to maintain motivation, but this will be discussed in detail in the goal setting. If you have no motivation, then there are no desires. If there are no desires, it means that you cannot distinguish, see, recognize, and accept them. You can’t focus on your desires, admit to them, or get confused among the desires imposed by society. Everyone runs – and I want to, all bloggers – and I want to be one, etc. Ask yourself: what are your desires? What do you want? What basic values are important to you? The more times in your life you ask these questions, the more you will think about the right aspiration. Instead of thinking about what to do or what to love more than just going to work and ordering food. Understand your desires, look for them, dig deeper. And then motivation will be your energy, and not a third force that you need to look for somewhere and never find.
The primary task is to get rid of the actions that you do because of the incentives as much as possible. You need to get into the comfort zone to start working with motivation. For example, because of the incentives, I did homework, went to university and hated work. I managed to get rid of the stimuli in the following way. It’s not a fact that it will suit everyone, but it worked for me. When I still didn’t understand what motivates me and where motivation comes from, I used a technique that I now call «Marty». This is a character from the movie «Back to the Future». He was constantly provoked «to dare», and he got involved in various challenges to prove that he could do anything. I’ve done something similar. When I was sitting at home in Donetsk and thought that I had to get up for work tomorrow at 5 in the morning, I asked myself 3 questions: «Do I deserve this?», «Why am I doing what I’m doing, and what will it give me in the future?» and «What do I really want?». I understood that I had brains, abilities, family and friends. Does it have to be that I work at a factory and live in an apartment with my grandmother’s repair? Stupid people tell me what to do, fine me and teach me about life. I don’t sleep much; I don’t see my wife and friends. I considered the situation as a threat to the security of my meaningful life, and there were no questions that something should be changed. I was afraid of losing a meaningful and controlled life. Therefore, in this way I motivated myself to break into changes in order to prove to myself that I could.
Motivation is a different thing. In 2011, I graduated from university and realized that no one needed me and my diploma. Everyone needs work experience and real skills to do something. For a long time, I resisted admitting to myself that 5 years of training were useless for my professional activity. What does it mean that I studied for 5 years, and now I have to study again to how a cool job? Then I tried to start from something based on fashion, demand and money. I tried to learn programming and understand marketing, but everything went by. Nothing worked. At some point I gave up and just started doing what I like. My weekends did not coincide with my wife, and more often I spent them alone. Then I was engaged in music, so I was interested in sound engineering, creating electronic drums, video editing and photography. At night at work, I read articles about different programs, and on weekends I made drums and different effects for videos and photos. I slept for 4 hours, got up and studied again. There were no problems with motivation and procrastination. I was just enjoying myself and didn’t think it wouldn’t bring me money. I just did what I like, as successful coaches’ advice. I always laughed at these words, but, funnily enough, it turned out that way. Gradually, because of the music, I became interested in cover design, delved into the study of Photoshop, then web design, then layout of landing pages, and so on. As a result, I realized that I like creating