LITMIR.BIZ

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to mention? Wasn’t she good enough at her work? The usual worry over making herself stand out began chugging through her mind.

      ‘Good. We don’t like swapping staff too often.’ Then, ‘So what do you do when you’re not here?’ Nathan was being friendly? Abnormally friendly, since he wasn’t known for idle chitchat.

      How to answer without giving herself away? ‘There’s always heaps of things needing attention where I live and people to check up on and shopping at the mall.’ Drivel spilled over her lips. ‘And I like going for walks.’ Definitely faking it. She rarely left the apartment other than to come to work.

      He was regarding her like he was sorry he’d asked. Good, then he wouldn’t find any more questions for her. Wrong. ‘Sounds like your evenings are free so you’ll have time to come to our midwinter Christmas barbecue.’ Nathan was talking about the out of season party some Aussies celebrated that had come about because of English people living in Australia who missed a cold Christmas. He tapped a sheet of paper lying on the desk. ‘I don’t see your name here.’

      That was because she had no intention of going. She wasn’t ready for that level of integration. An hour over breakfast was one thing, a full-on party quite another. Thought I was starting over, now that I’m free. ‘I haven’t thought about it.’ What excuse could she come up with? She tried to read the shift roster behind Nathan, but he was blocking her line of vision.

      ‘It’s a fortnight away but I like to know who’s coming well in advance. Bring a plate and your own alcohol. Meat provided.’ He was pointing a pen over his shoulder. ‘You’re not working that night.’

      There went that excuse for not going. Little did he know about how hard it was for her to go anywhere that was attended by lots of people.

      He hadn’t finished. ‘I encourage all the staff to join in. It’s good for morale, amongst other things.’

      New beginnings, remember? Deep breath. Go for it. Taking the pen from his fingers, mindful of not touching him, Molly scrawled her name beneath Vicki’s and added Dessert next to it. ‘There. Done.’ And she hadn’t stopped too long to think about it. Definitely a first.

      ‘Good.’ His tone didn’t back his reply. Those toast-coloured eyes were focused on her as though she was a mystery he was trying to unravel. She’d probably surprised him by giving in so quickly when it was well known she didn’t go out with any of the staff to movies or breakfasts.

      Amazed at how easily she’d signed up, she stood absorbing the slow wave of excitement rolling through her. She could do this. She really, really could. ‘Where’s the barbecue being held?’

      ‘At my place out in Coogee.’ He picked up a patient file and began reading the notes. Dark blond hair fell over his brow, making her itch to push it back in place.

      ‘Oh.’ The heavy pounding in her chest had returned, and her mouth began drying up like an overbaked sponge. Why hadn’t she noticed before that Nathan was disgustingly good looking? Probably her massive hang-up about getting close to men had kept the blinkers on until today, when she’d made the promise to move on, get a life. Did that mean finding love? Thump, thump, thump. It couldn’t. That’d be going too far, too soon. Molly had learned Paul’s lessons well. An absolute charmer, he’d sworn his undying love for her and wooed her completely. One year into their marriage the real Paul had come to light when he’d started hitting her whenever she’d disagreed with him, which was a sure-fire way of making her keep her mouth shut. Suddenly noticing Nathan as more than a doctor was scary. Wasn’t it?

      ‘Problem with that?’ Nathan asked without looking up.

      ‘Hell, yes.’ She wasn’t ready. It was too soon—wasn’t part of the plan to move on.

      Puzzlement blinked out at her. ‘Why? It’s usual to go to someone’s house for a party.’

      Embarrassment rose. She’d answered her question to herself out loud. This man was rattling her, which made no sense when, because of his self-assurance, she’d pretty much ignored him in the two months she’d worked here, unless it was to discuss a patient or argue over small things, like where the order for more syringes had got to. It’d been years since desire had lit her up, but if this tightness in her stomach and heat in her veins were any indication, she might be making up for lost time right now, in the middle of the ED. ‘Um, of course. I didn’t mean that. It’s fine. I’ll be there.’

      The alarm sounded. Code one. Relief had her racing to Resus and the man sprawled on the floor, unconscious.

      ‘Cardiac arrest,’ Vicki said, her clasped hands pushing down regularly on the exposed chest.

      Molly grabbed the electro pads, handed them to Nathan, who was right behind her. Next she snatched up the ventilator in preparation of a good outcome before kneeling down next to him.

      ‘Fill us in on the details,’ Nathan said as he prepared to administer a shock.

      ‘Geoff Baxter, forty-eight, chest pains, readings show a minor cardiac arrest an hour ago,’ Vicki intoned. ‘He was getting stroppy and didn’t want to stay on the bed. Started getting up and collapsed on the floor.’

      ‘Clear.’

      On Nathan’s command everyone moved away from the patient. The lifeless body jerked. The line on the monitor remained flat. Vicki started back on the compressions and Molly squeezed the oxygen bottle when she reached thirty.

      ‘Clear.’ Nathan gave a second shock.

      The line blipped, rose, then fell into an erratic pattern.

      ‘That’s better,’ Molly nodded. ‘Not perfect, but we’re getting there.’ She put the ventilator aside and got up to get the scoop stretcher so they could lift the man off the floor and back onto the bed.

      Another nurse, Hank, attached an oxygen mask, then began wiping a bleeding abrasion on Geoff’s forehead. ‘He hit the floor hard.’

      Nathan leaned close to the man. ‘Geoff, can you hear me?’

      Geoff opened his eyes briefly.

      ‘You’ve had a cardiac arrest. We’re going to keep you in here for a while, then you’ll be admitted to the intensive care unit.’

      Geoff shook his head once. ‘No.’

      ‘That’ll be a yes, then.’ Nathan gave one of his megawatt smiles.

      Molly’s stomach stirred, and he hadn’t even been looking in her direction. He’d often smiled at her, particularly whenever he’d wanted something unpleasant dealt with, but not in that full-on, cramp-her-stomach way he saved for others. Not that she’d given him reason to. Unless working hard and caring deeply about their patients counted, and apparently it didn’t. That was expected of her, no reward given—or required.

      Would a man ever again look at her and think, She’s lovely? One without hard fists? Did she want a man to notice her, get to know her? This new idea had to be part of moving forward, didn’t it? It was funny how in a previous, happy-go-lucky life she’d had her pick of gorgeous men, never had a problem finding a date for the glamorous occasions that came with being her entrepreneurial mother’s daughter. Not funny, really. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw no one to frighten her. Not that she expected to, but there were still times she just had to check, even though Paul would be in jail for many years to come. She’d lost a lot, but she was free.

      Hold on to that. And, yes, think about maybe one day falling love.

      Vicki nudged her. ‘Time to knock off, day shift’s here.’

      Another night done and survived without too much drama amongst the patients. She could relax, except her muscles weren’t playing the game. The old tension tightened her stomach and neck, while her shoulder blades tried to meet in the middle of her back. Because of the past? Or did she put this down to the rare heat in her veins, stirred up by Nathan Lupton? Yeah, like that’d be a blast.

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