LITMIR.BIZ

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on a confident smile, I sat beside Micah, who shuffled them along to make room.

      Sherri – a girl I had done music and drama with a million years ago – gave me a hug, reaching over Micah’s head to do it. At school she’d been the drama geek, and had gone on to make a few commercials, before deciding to concentrate on writing instead. I’d always liked her and I could tell she was that same quirky girl.

      “Clio, you look great! New York agreed with you.” She gave me an appraising once-over, and tutted. “I can’t see your shoes but I bet they’re fabulous.” I’d swapped the jeans for a dress and a blazer and some kitten heels, lest I fall on my face again.

      I laughed. “They’re baby heels. I seem to find every groove in the wood, or hole in the ground here. And it only seems to happen when I can fall into the arms of a stranger and totally embarrass myself.”

      “I don’t believe it for a second,” Sherri said. “When I heard you’d bought the old lodge, I was sure it was some kind of myth. I honestly thought that place would stay locked up for ever. What made you decide to buy it?”

      Running from a PR nightmare. “Oh, you know, I’ve always dreamed of being my own boss, doing parties for people my way. When it came up for sale after all these years, it seemed like a sign.”

      “Fate?”

      “Kismet?” Timothy interjected.

      I laughed. “Yes and yes.”

      Bennie waved across the table. He was another friend from high school, one of those guys who’d lived and breathed sports and hung out with me and Micah a lot back then. “Hey, Bennie. The years have been good to you as well.”

      He blushed. But really, he looked the same – they all did, except with some extra laugh lines, and fuller, more adult faces.

      “I can’t believe we’re all together again, as if no time has passed at all. What have you been up to?” he said.

      Everyone spoke at once and stopped and laughed. A silence filled the booth so Micah filled in the gaps. “Football jock Bennie went to college on a football scholarship, but busted up his knee, which put an end to his football career. Sad for Bennie, but great for us, because he came back to Evergreen and opened up a gym, which we frequent to pump iron and talk about what could have been. Sherri got married to said football jock, and they had twins, and then thought that was too easy so followed up with another little girl. This is their first night out since the baby was born.”

      “You got married?” My jaw fell open. Never in a million years would I have paired those two up, but I could see now how suited they were. They mirrored each other’s hand gestures, and laughed at the same time. I’m sure at school they wouldn’t have looked at each other twice; funny what growing up does to people.

      “We did.” Sherri giggled. “Once he stopped parading around like a beefcake I could see the appeal…”

      Bennie pretended to be offended. “Beefcake? What am I now? Strawberry shortcake?”

      Sherri puckered her lips and replied. “With a cherry on top.”

      Bennie grinned and took his wallet from a pocket, flipping open a compartment. “These are our girls. There’s the twins, Izzy and Dell, and the baby, Eva. As you can see they’ve got their mother’s good looks.”

      Sherri beamed.

      “They’re gorgeous,” I said, feeling a slight twinge in my lower gut. What on earth was that? A reminder from my biological clock? I ignored it, and studied the photo. They were sweet things with their mom’s jet-black hair, and big dark eyes.

      “I’m sorry about your football dreams, Bennie. But to think you’re parents now, wow, I bet you feel complete.” Where had that come from? Perhaps I was saying what they wanted to hear. But you could read it on them as surely as if it was tattooed how happy family life made them.

      Bennie shrugged. “Football seems a lifetime ago. We’re happy here. We are complete. Well… except for a little boy. Sherri isn’t keen on trying again, but who knows, after a few glasses of wine maybe I can convince her.” He gave her a look loaded with suggestion.

      “Clamp that mouth of yours closed.” She shook her head, and guzzled more wine. “He thinks you can put an order in, one little boy please, and once he’s delivered our baby-making days will be over… but what if we have another set of twins? Golly, sleep is so underrated when you don’t have kids.”

      “Sleep is for amateurs,” Bennie said. “We can sleep when we’re dead!”

      Sherri eye-rolled. “Easy for you to say, mister. Don’t think I don’t know you nap at the gym. Micah told me!”

      Bennie turned to at Micah. “You told her?”

      Micah lifted his hands in surrender. “It was an accident. It slipped out.”

      Sherri stared her husband down. “Sleep is for amateurs, right?”

      Bennie colored. “Right.” The jukebox in the back played one of our high-school faves, a pop ballad we used to croon to. I caught Timothy’s eye and smiled.

      Micah slapped Bennie on the back. “My gym fees just went up, didn’t they?”

      “Tenfold,” he laughed.

      We lapsed into silence as a waitress walked over. “Can I get you drinks?” We ordered a bottle of wine, and some beers. It felt good to fall back into old routines. Jesting, joking, making light of every little thing, Bennie making us cackle with kid-wrangling tales, and Sherri telling us the truth after his exaggerations. Most of my friends in Manhattan were childless, and planned to stay that way, and I wondered if they’d regret it later. Would I? It wasn’t too late, but with no relationship on the horizon, it didn’t seem like an option either. Their stories warmed me through, and part of me yearned for a family I didn’t have.

      More drinks were served and Timothy scooted around the table and sat beside me. “Tell us about the life you left behind…”

      There was something in the way he said it, or the way he arranged the words, that gave me pause. Did he suspect something, what with my hasty arrival in town?

      “Well…” I paused to work out which part to tell. “It truly is the city that never sleeps. Everyone works hard and plays hard too. Ambition is what drives the place, that and cocktail hour.” I laughed, trying to appear relaxed and make light of it all. “It was fun, but not the kind of place you want to stay for ever.” But I had. How I’d wanted to stay. I’d loved the high drama of New York, and the speed with which lives were lived. But maybe Amory was right and, if I’d stayed, I would have been heading for burnout. My sleeping patterns had been interrupted by hosting parties that carried over to the next day, and there was always the worry about the next one. Making it perfect. Keeping clients happy. Would Cedarwood be the same? Somehow I doubted it. While I’d still have a lot to do and organize, the pace would be different, I was certain of that.

      “What about you?” I asked. “Your kids are like little rays of sunshine.” Sort of.

      He gave me that same smile, the one reserved only for me. Did he use that on his wife? Puppy love, I reminded myself. And a million years ago at that.

      “They’re going through a bit of a stage at the moment. Testing the boundaries and all that jazz. It’s not their fault,” he said, when I urged him on with a nod. “I’ve recently split with their mom, and it’s been a big adjustment for them. For all of us.”

      At the bar the tender wiped down the bench, and looked around at the all-but-empty tables with a sigh of resignation. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out.” I was dying to prod him for answers, and wondered why… was I simply curious? Or was it something more?

      “We tried to make it work for the kids’ sake but we were just too different in the end. We were so young when we got married, too young, really, and it was never quite right,

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