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Relaxation Tape

       The Carrion Flower

       The Kittens

       Bog Body

       Reap

       Relaxation Tape

       The Last Animals

       Night Vision

       The Lodestars

       Notes and Acknowledgments

       wilder, v.

      arch.

      1. a. trans. To cause to lose one’s way, as in a wild or unknown place; to lead or drive astray; refl. to lose one’s way, go astray.

      3. trans. and intr. To render, or become, wild or uncivilized. Obs. rare.

      WILDER

      DESCENT

      Lost in a haunted wood,

       Children afraid of the night

       Who have never been happy or good

      W.H. AUDEN

      whose eyes have never really opened;

      who were born with bitter seeds sewn

      beneath our eyelids;

      whose eye bulbs glow red when salted;

      whose sockets grow tall bitter stalks

      that sprout small bitter buds

      that crawl with aphids;

      whose faces are wild fields, and fruitless;

      whose throats are peeled peaches, and voiceless;

      who collect eyeballs like marbles

      and shoot them around a dirt circle;

      who drag sickles across each other’s skulls

      and leave wet symbols

      we copy onto paper—tales of ancient children

      who vanished in a flood,

      who stumbled from the spring,

      who hid inside a haunted wood

      to save themselves from drowning.

Image

      we

      cross

      six trillion miles of

      everlasting night

      we

      are precious

      tendrils of light.

      We

      may be a sun to someone.

      Why should we

      be

      utterly lost

      ADVENT

      In the first month of the year

      birds curdled the air.

      From our windows we watched them

      clench and billow, their wings beating

      so low to the ground that seeds rose

      from their furrows.

      When our ears began to ache from the pressure,

      we sent out our augurs.

      A great fire, they said,

      is blowing from the east.

      This explained the fevers, the mercury

      that broke the levees of our mouths,

      the apples that dimpled and rotted

      in our orchards, dropping through the leaves

      like heart-sized hailstones.

      Behind our windows, we waited for the fire to turn

      even as we watched the horizon

      go red from edge to edge.

      Every morning new packs of animals fled

      through our orchards. Every morning

      new apples dropped into the hollows

      of their tracks.

      We watched our windows warp and crack,

      thought of our daughters’ hot foreheads,

      of the fevers we knew would climb and climb

      without breaking.

      We were out of songs to hum. Our throats were boxes

      of soot. In our orchards, no more insect thrum,

      no swallow quaver.

      How did we dare have children we couldn’t save?

      If we closed our eyes, the falling apples

      sounded like heavy rain.

      AFTERIMAGE

      After the explosion: the longest night.

      The shock spins a dream around us which,

      for our protection, refuses to end.

      Outside the dream, songbirds fall from the trees

      and sing their way to ash.

      Inside the dream, we look out the window

      at the sun that is not really a sun, which brightens

      and brightens until our eyes are melted glass.

      We watch our bodies flicker like lightning

      against the wall. We watch them fall

      and get back up again and fall

      and stay down.

      With every breath the dream thins like the skin

      of a balloon until we can see the inside

      and the outside of the dream at the same time,

      the birds swooping from the trees to land

      beside their own bones,

      our bodies reaching down to grab our shadows

      by the hands.

      AFTERSKY

       The blue noonday sky, cloudless, has lost its old look of immensity

      LEWIS THOMAS

      Note: there has been some speculation about the state of the sky—

      whether it is an infinite mouth dragging its gasp across us

      or

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