A Smart Girl's Guide to Parties - Apryl Lundsten American Girl

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the “respond by” date on the invitation—it might say something such as “RSVP by March 15” or “Please respond by November 10.”

      There will usually be a phone number for you to call, an e-mail address to write to, or a card to mail back. It’s best to respond right away. That way you won’t forget and leave the hostess hanging, and right from the start you’ll be on your way to being a great guest.

      Can’t go If you already know you can’t go to the party, let the hostess know as soon as you can. Tell her how happy you were to get the invitation and how bummed you are that you have to miss her party.

      Can’t make it last minute Sometimes things come up that can’t be avoided. You might get the flu or have to visit sick Uncle Ted in the hospital. Canceling at the last minute can be really disappointing—for you and the hostess. Give the hostess a call right away. Let her or her parents know you can’t come and be sure to tell them why.

      A phone call is best so that you can actually speak to a person. If you send an e-mail, she might not get it until the party is over and worry about where you are.

Two girls sit on a couch in their pajamas watching television and playing with a cute white cat. A blue line.

      left out

      I know someone who invited every girl in my class but me to her party. I thought we were friends. What did I do wrong?

      Getting left out happens to all of us at some point. It’s no fun, but it may have nothing to do with you personally. Maybe there was a limit to how many people could be invited, or the hostess’s parents made the final decisions on the guest list. Either way, accept the situation as it is, and don’t let it sour your friendship.

      On the day of the party, avoid moping around the house by having something fun planned—start a craft project, create a playlist of your favorite songs, get lost in a great book, or plan a sleepover with another friend who was not invited.

      I got invited to a party but my best friend didn’t. Now I’m afraid to tell her.

      Even if you’re trying to spare your friend’s feelings, you should be honest about receiving an invitation. Keeping a secret can lead to feelings of hurt and betrayal, which can poison a friendship. Suggest doing something together on a different day. And, unless she asks, don’t talk too much about the party afterward.

Three girls enjoy snacks and soda that have been set out.

      know before you go

      No two parties are exactly the same, but with the exception of sleepovers, most parties follow similar schedules.

      After guests arrive, the hostess will introduce everyone and leave time for chatting. Sometimes a light snack, such as chips and soda, will be served while guests get to know each other better.

      Then there’s often some sort of activity, such as playing games or sports, swimming, dancing, or doing something that matches the party’s theme.

      Following the activity, it’s time to eat—usually pizza, burgers, or cake is served.

      If it’s a birthday party, opening presents might follow the meal.

      After that, it’s usually time to go.

      Guests are often friends and family members of the hostess. Some guests may know each other from school, but there may be other guests who don’t, such as the hostess’s cousin or girls from her ballet class.

      The hostess’s mom and dad, or other adult, will chaperone the party. They’re there to make sure the party goes smoothly.

      The one thing you can count on is that the hostess wants all her guests to have a good time.

A blue line and the image of the girl out in the snow with the ice skates thrown over her shoulder.

      Party pro Just like getting good at a sport or musical instrument, being comfortable in new situations takes practice. Follow these tips to become a party pro.

      “Be me” Tell yourself this simple statement—and practice it regularly! Being myself means I’m:

      • confident;

      • happy with who I am; and

      • OK knowing I’m not always going to be perfect. (Who’s perfect, anyway? Nobody!)

      Strength in numbers If your friends are also invited to the party, go together. That way you have a built-in support group to talk to, dance with, and depend on. Having friends around can help you relax.

      What to bring

      • Gifts: If it’s a birthday party, try to ask the hostess questions that will give you clues about what gift she would like.

      • Food: Should you bring any snacks or drinks?

      • Other items: Is there anything you need to bring, such as skates, music, or a sleeping bag?

A girl with a word bubble above her approaches her parents about something.

      Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Jackson! I’m Kimberly.

      Greeting parents When meeting your hostess’s parents, be polite and pleasant. Introduce yourself.

      When you leave the party, be sure to say “good-bye” to the hostess’s parents and thank them for inviting you.

A white page with a blue line on it.

      Helping hand

      If you’re one of the first guests to arrive, find out if there’s anything you can do to help the hostess get ready for the party. Being helpful can ease you into a social situation and give you something to do.

      Get real

      Sure, you want to be charming and entertaining and make a lasting impression on everyone at the party, but be realistic. The most important thing is to be yourself and have fun. Worrying about doing and saying everything perfectly isn’t necessary and doesn’t help.

      Keep it in perspective

      Parties can seem really, really important—and they are, to a point. But your entire life does not depend on what happens at one party. Even if you trip over your own feet in front of everyone, or blurt out something you wish you hadn’t said, don’t worry about it too much. Everyone has done something embarrassing at one point or another.

Three different snapshots of the same girl. She is dressed casually in jeans, more formally in a skirt, then very elegantly in a fancy dress.

      getting dressed

      What you wear to a party depends on a few things:

      • how fancy the party is • what you’ll be doing at the party • the season or weather

      Here are some party outfit options to consider:

      Casual party • jeans and a tee • shorts and a tank top • skirt and a hoodie • sundress

      Dinner party with your parents, or with your friend and her parents • dress pants and a blouse • skirt and sweater • dressy jacket and skirt • sweater dress with leggings

      Wedding reception or other formal party • fancy dress • skirt and blouse • black dress and a dressy cardigan

An outfit on a hanger. Its a green dress with pink flowers all over it, and a matching pink sweater. A blue line.

      Make sure that whatever

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