LITMIR.BIZ

      Dense spruces covered by the thick blanket of untouched snow loomed over the land, tops aimed at those very stars, like the cover of an old Christmas card. The moonless night concealed the beauty of the mountain slopes, although the grandeur of the raw alpine nature bled through with the light of the stars. It seemed as though modern civilization had never touched this place, and that all these crests of snow and centuries-old spruces stood the same as they had two, three hundred years ago.

      «If there is no answer, then the question was wrong,» the voice of the philosophy professor sounded in the man’s mind like a flashback. «To every question, there is only one correct answer, which is the truth.»

      «What if there are several answers and they are all correct, and they are essentially versions of the truth?» he had asked, trying to argue with the professor.

      «Remember, young man, there can be only one truth, and its versions are mistakes that generate untruth,» the professor had said without even looking at him.

      But how do you find it, if the path towards this truth is darker than the blackness of this night? Where do you search, how do you determine the starting point, the thread that will eventually lead you to the truth?

      To some, it might have appeared that the man was preparing to commit suicide and was just about to leap. The desire to take a single step and throw himself off the cliff into the abyss of the roaring river was checked only by the instinct of self-preservation, inherent only to a sober mind and the irresistible thirst for life. In a fit of despair, his consciousness tore fragments of the past out of his memory, as if proving the need to continue the search for answers to questions that were rending his heart.

      «Could this be a solution? Could one step be all I need to get the answer,» he asked himself while peering into the inky blackness of the ravine.

      From the darkness of the night, his memory once again recalled the lecture hall at the university and the voice of his philosophy professor: «What can this last step towards Azrael1 and eternal slumber solve? Life in general is a directed movement from birth to death, avoided by nobody. The thought of ending one’s own life is driven by the desire to find some ultimate truth, but also doubt in achieving it. After all, the more you crave the ultimate, the more you realize its unattainability. It is these shifts between both extremes that lead to self-ruin.»

      The professor paused, scanned the audience with unseeing eyes, took a book from his desk and, after shuffling through some pages, continued: «Sigmund Freud2, the most renowned psychologist and psychiatrist of his time, even introduced the notion of the ’death drive’ or death instincts, since he could not otherwise explain many of the things a human being is capable of inflicting on themselves. The desire for self-destruction, it seems, is in our nature. While all living things struggle to survive, some humans, on the contrary, invest extraordinary energy into ruining their lives completely, sometimes ending them.»

      The professor put the book aside and, crossing his hands across his chest, and after a small pause addressed the first row of students: «As to what pushes a certain individual to choose the path of self-destruction is a controversial issue that isn’t fully understood yet. After all, human beings have been observed and studied closely throughout the millennia, yet they remain underexplored, and something that is difficult to explore and analyze.»

      The bell ending the lecture rang and the sound of whispering filled the hall. The professor, however, quickly glanced at his watch and monotonously and firmly continued in a raised voice: «In the paradigm of human history, the circumstances that have led to suicide were as different as the people who chose this path, or, more specifically, such an end to their life. This suggests that there are as many solutions in the classification of the circumstances that lead to suicide as there are people.

      «However, could such a step change the circumstances that pushed a person to end their life this way? Could this change those who influenced the circumstances that caused the person to make this decision? Doubtful, as people don’t change, for the most part. They can mimic others or pretend to be better than

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