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of the counter out of the way. She wiped her hands on a towel and turned from the sink. “Why did you knock, Thad? Did you want me to come out and help with something?”

      “Nein, we need to talk.”

      “Let me dish up the food and we can talk during dinner. Leah’s napping so it gives us a few minutes.” May set the bowl of boiled potatoes next to the meatballs, sauerkraut, green beans and cinnamon bread already on the table. She pulled her chair from the table, letting the legs scrape against the wood flooring, then sat. They bowed their heads for silent prayer.

      Thad rubbed his hands across his trousers. “It was a warm one today.” His voice shook on the last word. Lord, please help me say what I must. After taking a bite, he took his napkin and blotted his mouth. “Mmm. This is delicious, but then your cooking is always gut.”

      The hot food and warm kitchen teamed to coat his brow in perspiration. He swallowed hard, laid his fork down, took a deep breath, and told May about the bishop’s visit the other day and the bishop’s conversation with his daed today.

      Her face went blank and her smoky-gray eyes turned stormy black.

      “May, I adore you. I cared for you, nein, I loved you in a way when we courted, and I think you cared for me, too. We can get that back if we work at it. I’d like you to marry me. But if the answer is nein...then you’ll have to move out of the haus.”

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      His words speared May in the heart. “Who is gossiping about us?”

      “If the bishop told Daed, he never told me.” Thad lowered his gaze. “I must say, you’re not as surprised as I thought you’d be.” He raised his chin to face her again.

      “Your daed never indicated who complained, or maybe named a neighbor?” Her eyes locked with his.

      “Nein. It might be one of the buwe that work on the farm. Maybe they told the bishop, or their folks, that I walk in and out of the haus whenever I please without knocking or something like that. Did they ever stop to think, it is my haus, and you are only the...nanny?”

      May’s heart nearly stopped. Only the nanny?

      “Look, May, I care about you, and I owe it to April to take care of you. We can get married and all will be well. What do you say?”

      May stared at him in utter disbelief.

      Leah let out a cry from her crib in the other room. She hurried and picked her up, changed her and snuggled her close as a tear threatened but May batted it away. How was she going to survive without seeing this sweet little girl?

      She carried Leah to the kitchen, and set her down in the high chair. “I’ll get her food ready so we can talk.” She got her food and set her plate and cup on her tray.

      “Okay, where were we?”

      “May, you didn’t answer my question.”

      She swallowed hard and looked Thad in the eye. “Before April died, she asked me to take care of her boppli. I stayed here to do just that, instead of going to Indiana, where Mamm’s family lives. Now I’m repaid by my friends and neighbors gossiping about me?”

      “I—I’m sure it’s not like that...” Thad stuttered.

      “Nein, apparently it is.” A knot tightened in the pit of her stomach. “I appreciate your offer of marriage, Thad, but that would keep you from marrying someone you loved.”

      “Nein. I did not say it right before. I liebe you and want to marry you. We could make it work, May. If I hadn’t married April, we might have...” He stopped.

      Her cheek twitched and heat rushed up her neck and burned all the way to her ears. She was sure her eyes shot lightning bolts.

      In the silence, the ticking of the kitchen clock pulsed like the heartbeat of the haus.

      Her life had just changed in a few seconds. The haus, the farm, Leah... Thad had everything. She had nothing once again. At least he’d given her a place to stay, for a little while anyway. Now, Gott had taken that away, too, but He stretched out two roads before her and she must choose.

      “Thaddaeus Thomas Hochstetler. What’s going on? You should be in the field.”

      May jerked around at the same time Thad did to see Gretchen with her hands perched on her hips.

      “Mamm, people are gossiping about us living together, and we are discussing whether to marry or not.”

      “You want to marry May? Nein. She’s nothing like her sister.” Gretchen huffed and glanced at the dozen jars of canned string beans on the counter, then her gaze dropped to the bucket sitting on the floor still full of beans to be canned. “April worked twice as fast as her.”

      A flash of heat stormed through May’s body as she listened to Gretchen berate her. Ha, three votes against staying: Edna’s offer was one, her discomfort around Thad was two, and now Gretchen’s unkind words.

      Thad grabbed his mamm’s arm and escorted her out of the haus. When he stomped back into the kitchen, his face was as pale as a whitewashed fence.

      “I have a lot to think about, Thad. Can you look after Leah for a little while?”

      He nodded. “I’m sorry about all this, May.”

      Before she reached the stairs, Leah started to cry. She stopped and glanced at Thad. “You sure you’re okay with her?”

      “Jah, we’re gut.”

      Before May reached the stairs, Leah was crying. This was a gut test for Thad to see how he handled his tochter on his own.

      May closed her bedroom door and collapsed on the bed. She didn’t want to marry Thad. She didn’t love him. She could barely talk to him.

      But she loved Leah and that little mädel loved her like a mama. She could sell her rag rugs to help Thad and she could bake bread, rolls, pies and cookies and sell them at her roadside stand.

      But the whole idea was just crazy. She and Thad didn’t liebe each other, not anymore, if they ever did.

      She could hear Leah crying downstairs, then the sniffling grew closer, and closer and stopped. A tap sounded on her door.

      She hesitated, then opened it. “Janie, what are you doing here?”

      “That’s a nice greeting for a friend. I hadn’t seen you for a while so thought I’d stop by on my way to town. Mamm keeps me busy canning, but I wanted to see you. Thad said you were up here doing some thinking. He couldn’t quiet this one’s crying.” Janie gave Leah a squeeze.

      Leah sniffled and held her arms out to May, sobs rocking her little shoulders while her nose ran. When Janie handed her over, Leah almost jumped into May’s arms.

      May enveloped her in a hug, then wiped the tears and her nose. Leah laid her head on May’s shoulder with her arm stretched around her neck. “Shh. Everything will be okay.”

      May pointed toward the bed and her friend sat. She confided her dilemma and watched Janie gasp with each new piece of information.

      “What are you going to do? If you ask me, I think you should give Thad a second chance,” Janie whispered. “I think he’s cute, and I’ve always liked him. Plus, he’s tall with a muscular back and strong arms. Now, what mädel could resist that?”

      “You’re guy crazy.” May lifted a brow. “I believe I have two choices—marry Thad or move to Shipshewana, where I would probably never see Leah again. And right now, she is the only joy in my life.”

      “The decision to marry is for life. Amish don’t get

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