LITMIR.BIZ

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he wondered? Maybe she wasn’t so easy to read after all? He had debated whether to invent an urgent appointment and bring this visit to a premature end, but he was glad now that they had stayed longer. Not that Lara would have broken down, she was too determined to appear thrilled for her sister, but if he had to watch her being bright and smiley while her heart was breaking for another second...he doubted he would be able to fulfil his promise of silence on the subject of her miscarriage.

      ‘I can’t get over how much she’s grown,’ Lara said, retrieving a toy that had been tossed on the floor.

      ‘They usually do in a year,’ her twin responded quietly.

      The stricken look that slid across Lara’s face could have been caused by the undertone in her twin’s voice, or the reminder of the previous visit, right after the birth, when Lara had insisted on flying over to see her sister.

      Only a couple of weeks after her own miscarriage. Raoul had tried his best to dissuade her, but in the end she’d threatened to catch a flight on her own, so he’d taken her.

      It had been a nightmare. Oh, Lara had managed to say all the right things at the hospital, had held the baby and told her sister how clever she was, but outside she had virtually collapsed in a heap.

      She had sobbed uncontrollably on the flight back and pretty much for the next two days. Since then she had made excuses whenever a visit home was suggested, until today.

      ‘Goodbye, Emily Rose, be good for Mummy.’

      The baby, who was dressed in a cute pink outfit that she was almost too big for at eleven months, grabbed for Lara’s hair.

      ‘No, Emmy.’ Lily clicked her tongue and detached the chubby fingers.

      From where he was standing Raoul could see the muscles in Lara’s pale throat working as she straightened up. Even someone with an armour-plated heart could not have failed to be moved by her struggle for control. He might not agree with her decision to keep the miscarriage a secret, but it was her decision, and he had to respect that. However wrong, misguided and pig-headed he thought she was being.

      He cleared his throat and glanced pointedly at the time that blinked on the screen of his phone. ‘I’m sorry to break up the party and drag you away, but we’re on the clock here.’

      It worked. Lara’s twin and mother looked at her with sympathy and him with a lack of it—which was fine by Raoul. He was not seeking either their sympathy or approval.

      He placed a hand on Lara’s elbow and, projecting a level of callous impatience that he hoped was consistent with someone heartless and controlling—after all, was it a million miles from his actual character?—he raised his voice once more to be heard above the whirr of the blades of the waiting helicopter.

      ‘Ladies.’ He tipped his head curtly and pulled Lara, skipping along on her spiky heels to keep up with him, towards the door. She still retained her grip on his arm, though she no longer needed his support.

      Behind them the two women exchanged worried glances.

      Once they took off and the figures below vanished from view, Lara released a long shuddering sigh and leaned back, her eyes closed.

      Sitting opposite her, Raoul sat waiting.

      ‘There is no urgent appointment, is there?’

      ‘No.’

      She opened her eyes, which were luminescent with tears. ‘I could have coped.’

      ‘I’m sure you could,’ he returned smoothly. ‘But I probably wouldn’t have if we’d stayed any longer.’

      She shook her head as if the idea the day had been anything other than a breeze for him had not occurred to her. ‘It was lovely to see everyone.’

      People she missed...a life she regretted leaving behind? He pushed the thought away. ‘Everyone said how lovely the baby was.’

      He arched a brow at her quick defence. ‘And nobody, not a soul, mentioned the father.’

      Eyes wide with horror, she leaned forward in her seat. ‘You didn’t...?’

      ‘What, after you told me the subject was off-limits? I wouldn’t dare.’

      She gave a disbelieving grunt and settled back in her seat.

      ‘But the strain of not mentioning the elephant in the room was beginning to tell.’

      ‘Lily hasn’t told anyone.’ Not even me. ‘Raoul...? It’s been nearly a year now, and I haven’t changed my mind.’

      Though she had been angry at the time, she was grateful now that he had insisted on the wait. For the last few months her emotions had been all over the place.

      She knew she hadn’t been easy to live with but Raoul had been incredibly patient, when she got angry with him, herself or life in general. And then there had been the sad times when all she could do was cry.

      ‘Today—’

      ‘Today was hard,’ she admitted. ‘Inside,’ she said, pressing a hand to her chest, ‘I feel like a mother but no one can see that. One day I hurt, the next I feel as if it had happened to someone else. I know I’ve been hell to live with and that was never part of the contract.’

      ‘I broke the contract when I got you pregnant.’

      ‘So your guilt is keeping us together.’ She turned to stare at the clouds.

      He wished he could have said yes, that would have made things simpler to sort in his own mind, but though guilt played a part there was a lot more keeping him with Lara, more than he wanted to think about.

      ‘A little while back I thought you’d changed your mind... Was I wrong?’

      She turned her head and looked at him in astonishment. ‘For a while,’ she admitted, ‘I did feel as though having another baby would be betraying the one I lost... I suppose that sounds mad to you.’

      ‘No, it doesn’t.’

      Her eyes slid from his and she looked out of the window. ‘It might never happen for us.’

      He responded with an emotion-dampening positivity. ‘Of course it will, and if it doesn’t it won’t be for lack of trying.’

      ‘So you haven’t changed your mind?’

      His libido gave a lazy kick as she relaxed and laughed again; the sound made him realise how rare these moments were now.

      ‘I want...’ He wanted to see her happy, he wanted to repair the damage he had wrought after watching what she had been through during the last year. He would have done anything to make her laugh like that again. ‘No,’ he said softly.

      ‘How about it, then...?’ Holding his interested gaze, she slipped off her spiky heels and, tongue caught between her teeth in sexy concentration, her green eyes wide and mockingly innocent, she stretched out her bare foot and moved it slowly up his leg.

      ‘You think...?’

      He felt the heat rising up his neck, then the heat coalesced a little lower as her foot came to rest between his thighs. ‘In a helicopter, really...?’

      Eyes dancing, she gave a wicked chuckle and withdrew her foot. ‘Well, maybe it can wait until the plane... I mean, what’s the use of having a private jet if you can’t make use of the privacy?’

      ‘I like the way your mind works,’ he said, thinking now this was the way babies should be made!

       CHAPTER TWELVE

      Eight months later

      IT HAD BEEN Lara’s idea to revive the masked ball that had last been held at the palazzo twenty years before. If anyone had asked him his opinion, and they hadn’t, Raoul would have pointed

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