LITMIR.BIZ

       Six

      As they drove through town and took a turn in the direction of the Battlelands, Amanda looked at Nathan’s profile. There was a slight smile on his face, but that told her nothing other than that he was pleased with himself. Hmm.

      “Are we going to the ranch house?”

      He glanced at her and smiled. “You’ll see.”

      Why was he being so secretive? What was he up to?

      She could play along, so she said, “It’d be nice to see Jake and Terri again. Been a long time since I’ve seen their kids.”

      “Uh-huh. You will eventually.”

      So, probably not going there right now. Okay, fine. She could be patient. To a point.

      “How’re you and Pam getting along these days?”

      The question caught her off guard and made her a little uncomfortable at the same time.

      “About the same,” she said. “She’s glad I’m there in the diner, but I think she’d rather if I could phone in the work from somewhere else.”

      He frowned. “She’s got some issues with you.”

      “There’s a news flash,” she murmured. She had a couple of issues with Pam, too, now that she knew her sister had dated Nathan. Probably shouldn’t matter since she and Nathan were so done when it had happened. But it did matter, darn it. She didn’t like her big sister making a move on her ex. And one of these days, she and Pam were going to have to talk about that. But for now, she changed the subject. “Speaking of families, how’re Jake and Terri doing?”

      Now he gave her a real smile. “They’re great. I know you’ve kept up with what’s going on here in Royal, so I’m guessing you know they have twin boys and a little girl?”

      “Yeah,” she said, smiling wistfully. “Last time I came home to visit my dad before he—well, I made sure you were nowhere around and I met Terri and the kids in town.”

      Nodding, he said only, “The twins are in kindergarten now and Emily’s talking all the time.”

      A small ache settled in her chest, thinking about Nathan’s nephews and niece. Children always did that to her, though—made her remember that she’d been cheated out of her child. Amanda had been playing what-if for more than seven years—wondering how her life might be different if only she hadn’t lost Nathan’s child. They’d have married, of course—Nathan wouldn’t have had it any other way. But would they be happy? Or would he have always felt trapped by circumstances? Would she always wonder if he really loved her or had married her solely out of duty? Questions she would never have the answers to.

      She tried to shake them off. “Emily’s almost two now, isn’t she?”

      “Yeah, and a beauty. Has Jake wrapped around her tiny fingers, too.” He chuckled and shook his head. “Hard to believe sometimes that Jake’s a father, but he’s damn good at it.”

      So would you have been, she couldn’t help thinking. And maybe his thoughts were mirroring hers because his features slid into more somber lines.

      A few miles of silence filled the big black car before Nathan took a turn she recognized.

      “So we’re not going to the ranch house at all.”

      “Nope.”

      “We’re going to the river.”

      “That’s the plan.”

      Nerves jittered and Amanda told herself not to build anything out of this. After all, Nathan had grown up on this land. He and Jake had spent most of their childhoods at the river, fishing, swimming, avoiding chores. For him, this place was just a part of his life. There was no reason to believe that Nathan felt the same…affection for this spot that she did. For Amanda, this river was magical. This one slice of his family’s ranch would always be special to her.

      Cutting right through the heart of the Battlelands, the fast-moving river was shaded on either bank by ancient live oaks. It was cool and green and lush. As they approached, she couldn’t help remembering—and didn’t try too hard to stop—that she and Nathan had been in this private place when they made love for the first time so long ago.

      Her heartbeat quickened as the memories inside her mind played out like a movie. She could see them both so easily. Young, eager, and for her at least, so much in love she was drowning in the overflow of emotions. Nerves had been thick, but desire was more prominent. It was as if in this one place, time had stopped. The world had dropped away and she became a part of the one man she had always wanted.

      Was he remembering? Did he think about that night and all the nights that had followed? Did he have the same regrets she did? Or had he really moved on from their shared past—and if he had, why were they here together now?

      The sun was so low now, that only the barest hint of color remained in the sky. Amanda turned her head to the side, looking away from Nathan. What was she supposed to think about this? What was he expecting? Was he deliberately trying to recreate that night? Did he really think that after all these years, all it would take is this one romantic setting and time would roll back?

      Oh, God. What if he was right?

      The Texas landscape stretched out for miles beneath a faintly rose-colored sky. Grasses waved in a sultry wind on either side of the lonely road and Amanda drew an uneasy breath. Years without Nathan and now, in a single day, he was wiping away the emptiness and drawing her back into a net designed to reawaken emotions she’d thought long buried. How could he take her from fury to desire so easily? And how could she defend her heart against him when all she really wanted was what they’d once had?

      “Look familiar?” he asked, voice deep enough to rumble along her spine like tentative fingertips.

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