LITMIR.BIZ

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her delicate head from the sun.

      Lexi could feel the stab of pain as she stared down at the button nose. She thought she could see a trace of Xenon’s mouth in the rosebud shape of her mouth—or was that just wishful thinking? She stroked one soft little cheek and felt a wave of longing washing over her as she looked down at the little girl.

      ‘Oh, Kyra, she’s beautiful.’

      ‘Isn’t she?’ Kyra beamed, her blue eyes glowing. ‘Well, I’m her mother so of course I’m biased, but Nikola agrees with me that she is the most beautiful baby in the world. And she sleeps. Oh, how she sleeps! Sometimes we can’t believe our luck, can we, darling? Oh look, here’s Mitera.’

      Lexi looked across the courtyard to see Marina Kanellis walking towards them, unruffled and cool in a dress of pale linen. She kissed her daughter and son-in-law and then held out her arms for the baby, before raising her brows at Lexi.

      ‘That is unless you would like to hold her, Alexi?’

      ‘Yes, Lexi, hold her,’ urged Kyra.

      Lexi held her breath and for one crazy moment it felt as if they were all looking at her and judging her. As if they were all conspiring in some secret experiment to see how much she would be affected by the presence of the baby. Xenon’s blue gaze seemed to be lancing through her and she wondered if her face was showing the irrational fear she felt inside.

      But maybe this was what she needed to do. She couldn’t go through the rest of her life shying away from one of the most essential parts of it and babies were an essential part. Her brothers might go on to have families of their own—she certainly hoped so—and she would want to be a part of those families.

      Tentatively, she nodded. ‘I’m not very good with babies.’

      ‘Oh, you’ll soon learn!’ said Kyra as Nikola put the little bundle in her arms.

      Lexi held the baby close and breathed in her sweet, warm scent. She felt the weight of her small but surprisingly substantial body and hugged her closer.

      ‘See!’ said Kyra, with a note of triumph. ‘You’re a natural. You’ll make a great mother yourself one day, Lexi.’

      Lexi couldn’t speak. For a moment she could scarcely breathe. Had they forgotten, or had they just chosen to forget? She wanted to say that she was a mother—and nobody could ever take that away from her. Just because her baby hadn’t lived, didn’t mean that she hadn’t once carried Xenon’s child, did it?

      And then, to her horror, the infant turned her head, instinctively rooting around as her little mouth searched fruitlessly for Lexi’s breast. Despite the temperature, she stood frozen to the spot, hoping that the heat of the day hid her blush. ‘I think she may be hungry.’

      Kyra was giggling as she plucked her daughter from Lexi’s arms. ‘She’s always hungry! Why don’t you and I go inside while I feed her? You can tell me all about your jewellery business and I might even commission a couple of pieces, since Xenon says they’re very good.’

      Lexi looked up, to find Xenon’s gaze still on her, glad for the swift change of subject. ‘Did you?’ she asked, in surprise.

      ‘Well, the investor in me has always preferred gold to silver,’ he admitted, his gaze drifting to the amethyst-studded coils of silver which were dangling from her ears. ‘But I can see for myself that they are very beautiful.’

      His unexpected compliment went a little way towards soothing Lexi’s ruffled nerves, but the prospect of watching his sister feed the baby was an ordeal she would rather have foregone. Nonetheless, she followed Kyra into the grand house and perched on the edge of one of the sofas. She watched as the baby was latched onto her mother’s breast and Kyra settled back with a contented little sigh, before turning a quizzical blue gaze on her.

      ‘So you’re back?’ she said, without preamble. ‘Back with my brother—my darling brother—and I can’t tell you how happy that makes me. You know, even my mother is pleased?’

      Lexi hesitated and for a moment she longed to slip into the role which seemed to have been created for her. Suddenly she wanted to be Xenon’s wife again, in every way that counted. But if she allowed herself to believe the fantasy—even for a second—it would make walking away all the harder. ‘I’m only here for the christening,’ she said.

      Kyra’s eyes narrowed. ‘But no longer?’

      ‘I’m afraid not.’

      There was a pause, a silence during which the only sound Lexi could hear was that of the baby glugging contentedly and as a background noise it couldn’t have been more poignant. If that had been me, then would it all have been different? she wondered. If I had carried Xenon’s baby to term, then might the split never have happened? But she still would have been lonely in the marriage, wouldn’t she? She would still be having to fight for every second of her husband’s time. She would still have been that insecure woman who was too scared to be herself.

      ‘Lexi?’

      Lexi saw Kyra screw up her face in the way people did when they weren’t sure whether what they were about to say was wise.

      ‘What?’ Lexi asked softly, but she guessed what was coming next. Because she knew that Xenon’s little sister had always seen the world as one great big rose-tinted ball of romance. Hadn’t she gazed at her and Xenon with rapturous joy as they had taken their vows, her pink coronet of bridesmaid flowers contrasted against her gleaming dark hair?

      ‘Xenon has missed you, Lexi. He’s missed you a lot.’

      ‘I don’t want to talk about Xenon,’ said Lexi gently. ‘And I don’t think it’s appropriate to talk about him with you—much as I adore you.’

      ‘You know, I’ve never seen him like that before,’ Kyra said, blithely continuing as if no objection had been raised.

      ‘Like what?’ asked Lexi, curious in spite of everything.

      ‘Like he was...lost.’ Kyra shrugged and the baby at her breast made a loud, sucking noise as if in protest. ‘Like nothing made sense any more.’

      ‘Describing Xenon as lost would be like describing Australia as a small island,’ observed Lexi wryly. ‘Xenon is strong. Stronger than anyone I’ve ever met. He doesn’t do “lost”.’

      ‘I wonder,’ said Kyra slowly, ‘if that isn’t just the reputation he’s acquired because all his life people have relied on him. Strong Xenon. Invulnerable Xenon. Xenon who goes around picking up the pieces of other people’s lives and putting them back together. Maybe it’s time that somebody looked out for him for a change.’

      Lexi looked down at her hands. At the band of gold which was gleaming brightly on her finger. She heard what Kyra was saying and she felt a hopeless twist of longing.

      Maybe somebody should look out for Xenon, but that person could never be her.

       CHAPTER TEN

      NEXT MORNING, LEXI got up early while Xenon was still sleeping, leaving him sprawled out on the rumpled sheets which bore testimony to their long night of love-making. Quietly, she slid a bikini from the drawer and changed in the bathroom before going outside to the vast infinity pool which overlooked the bay.

      In the milky, golden light of the early morning, the distant sea glittered like sapphires and everything looked sparkling clean and fresh. Sprinklers had been spraying the flowers overnight so that their petals were still dowsed with tiny droplets of water.

      The pool was cool when she dived in but Lexi was glad for the shock to her senses. Shock was good. It brought her thoughts back to the present instead of letting them meander off into a dreamy and unrealistic future. It reminded her that this tryst with Xenon was purely temporary. Well, maybe pure was the wrong word, but it was definitely temporary.

      He

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