LITMIR.BIZ

      WALKING IN THE park was an activity Lauren looked forward to. Sometimes they talked and other times they were quiet, but the companionship between them was most evident here. They crossed the street and passed through the gates on a warm July day.

      She’d been wearing a different version of the nostalgic nanny outfit for a week, thanks to Amy. Jake eyed her suspiciously. She was bound to draw attention and she wasn’t sure he was ready for that. It didn’t take long before she was surrounded by children asking who she was pretending to be. Turned out, she was ready for that as she launched into a song and dance, and pretended to pull something magical from her bag. Jake stood to the side, away from her and away from the parents and nannies overseeing the safety of their children.

      They recognized that the song she sang was from the remake of the famous musical Mary Poppins, and joined in.

      She waved goodbye as she rejoined Jake and the kids ran happily back to their parents.

      “You’re really good with kids,” he said.

      Lauren couldn’t tell Jake that the real reason why, not unless she wanted today to be the last time they saw each other.

      “It’s the dress and the hat.” She glanced up, but all she saw was the brim of the straw hat that went with the costume. “They just want to be loved and happy.”

      “You don’t have any problem wearing that costume out in public in July?”

      Lauren checked herself. “Are you kidding? This is New York City. Other than kids, nobody notices. They probably think I’m promoting the play.” An updated version was currently on Broadway. “Is it bothering you?”

      “I’m a little old to be out with my nanny.”

      “Well, if anyone says anything, just point them to me. I’ll find something in my magic bag to make them go away.”

      Lauren was really having fun. The costume was for Jake’s benefit, but the kids added a special touch she hadn’t counted on.

      She clasped his right arm through the sling and wasn’t surprised when Jake reacted to the contact.

      “What are you doing?” he asked, trying to jerk away from her.

      “Nothing different. I usually take your arm when we walk.”

      “You usually walk on this side.” He pointed to the ground with his left hand.

      “It makes no difference,” she said innocently.

      Jake’s glare told her she knew it made a difference.

      “Jake, you have two arms. So why does it matter which side I walk on? Today, I choose this side.”

      To drive her point home, she grasped the arm tighter. Checking that there was no sign of pain, she gripped his biceps.

      “I see those exercises are working. This arm is a lot stronger,” she said, deflecting the subject.

      He knew by now that she could be as stubborn as he was and it was best if he just let her have her way. He started walking. He moved fast and Lauren stumbled once before matching his stride.

      “Do you think I’ll let go if you break into a run?” she asked after they’d maintained the fast walk for three minutes.

      Jake stopped. “You know I can do this on my own.”

      “You’ve made that very clear. I understand that you’re trying to get rid of me. Other than the arm massage, you’d like me to leave for parts unknown.”

      “Exactly,” he said with a smile, only this smile wasn’t laced with humor. Bitterness might identify it, nonetheless, it was clear he wanted her gone.

      “That’s it. You don’t want anyone around you. You want to wallow in sorrow and wonder why you? Why did this have to happen to you? You’re a surgeon. You fix people. So why take away the one thing that you can do?”

      “Careful, Ms. Peterson. You’re skating on thin ice.”

      The stare she gave Jake could melt steel. She held it for several moments, then dropped his arm and turned around before walking just as fast as he had back toward Central Park West.

      It wasn’t Jake’s fault. He didn’t know about her—didn’t understand that she’d lost a child.

      She reached the apartment in record time. Once in her room, she slammed the door shut and backed up against it. Seconds later, her legs gave out and she slid to the floor.

      Lauren couldn’t cry. Her eyes were burning but she’d shed all the tears she had a year ago. Her body’s trembling was her only outward reaction. She didn’t know how long she sat there, her legs curled under her. When she got to her feet, they tingled with the pins-and-needles sensation from sitting in one position for too long.

      Jake was wrong. No visible appendage had been taken from her. She’d given it. Free and clear. Without argument or resistance.