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       Copyright

      The Borough Press

      An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd

      1 London Bridge Street

      London SE1 9GF

       www.harpercollins.co.uk

      First published in Great Britain by HarperCollinsPublishers 2019

      Copyright © Layla AlAmmar 2019

      Cover design by Holly Macdonald © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2019

      Cover photography © HMoodboard/Getty Images

      Layla AlAmmar asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

      A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.

      This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

      All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

      Source ISBN: 9780008284442

      Ebook Edition © March 2019 ISBN: 9780008284466

      Version: 2019-12-09

       Praise for The Pact We Made:

      ‘[A] fascinating glimpse into the complex and contradictory life of a modern Kuwaiti woman … full of personality and touches of humour’

       Guardian

      ‘So beautifully written and so important, and so cleverly crafted, it can’t be a debut. But it is’

      Joanna Cannon

      ‘The Pact We Made deals with one woman’s search for independence’

       ELLE

      ‘A Kuwaiti #MeToo novel of muffled suffering and a bid for freedom – absorbing, brave and compelling’

      Leila Aboulela

      ‘Brilliant book about the pressures of being a 30-year-old unmarried woman in Kuwait – the struggle for modernity amidst patriarchal tradition – and the cultural failure to acknowledge trauma. What a debut’

      Pandora Sykes

      ‘Fascinating, nuanced and understanding’

       Observer

      ‘Truthful and courageous, radical and lyrical. I loved it’

      Hanan al-Shaykh

      ‘One of those books you ration so it doesn’t end too soon, it’s beautifully written and unbelievably powerful. I loved it’

      Katie Lowe, author of The Furies

      ‘Kuwaiti writer Layla AlAmmar’s debut is, on the surface, the story of a woman about to turn 30 and under pressure to find a husband. But it’s a layered exploration of Kuwaiti society and culture as well. And it’s a look at grief, trauma and the expectations placed upon young women that will resonate with women across the world’

      Sarah Shaffi, Phoenix

      ‘A timely and deeply affecting debut with a voice that needs to be heard, at a time when it matters most’

      Charlotte Philby, author of The Most Difficult Thing

      ‘Set in contemporary Kuwait, AlAmmar asks us to reimagine the lives of modern Muslims as they struggle to reconcile the freedom of choice with the customs of their faith’

      BBC Radio 3 Free Thinking

      ‘A complex novel championing feminism in the Arab world’

       The National

      ‘The Pact We Made is a book about marriage, but it would be a mistake to think that it is a conventional love story. Instead, it’s a book about familial and cultural expectations, the lingering effects of trauma, and healing and loving yourself again. Also resistant to easy judgement is Dahlia, who is a complex character, unsure of how to navigate a life and roles that have been thrust upon her. But it’s no coincidence that she is named after a flower, something that is so easily damaged but that, with some care and attention, the right kind of light and tenderness, can be restored to something newer and stronger … In Dahlia and The Pact We Made, AlAmmar has created something strong and lasting, a book about a woman battling to exist on her own terms in a world which wants women to stay quiet. Dahlia and AlAmmar are making their voices heard, and that’s a great thing’

       The New Arab

       Dedication

       To Mom, my first reader, for handing me a book all those years ago.

       Epigraph

      ‘At a very early period she had apprehended instinctively the dual life – that outward existence which conforms, the inward life which questions.’

      Kate Chopin, The Awakening

      ‘No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true.’

      Nathaniel Hawthorne

      Contents

       Cover

       Title Page

       Copyright

       Praise for The Pact We Made

       Dedication

       Epigraph

       Chapter 1: The Marriage Pact

       Chapter 2: Hush

      

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