LITMIR.BIZ

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a month ago, my husband, Shane, got a huge promotion—to VP of the web design firm he works for. Came with a big raise, and we’re all really happy about it. But here’s the kicker— Shane and I had a long discussion. Seems he’s STILL not satisfied about my ability to say “no” to doing stuff. I mean, it’s a lot better than it was a couple of years ago. We’re still homeschooling, and with four kids—one of whom is now a teenager—there’s bound to be a lot of activities. We only let the kids pick three extra things per week to be involved in. So it’s only twelve total! But I’m not directing the church Christmas production, or teaching the marriage classes, or coordinating the home school co-op classes. I still lead a women’s Bible study group, but that’s ministry so it doesn’t count!

      I tried to explain all this to Shane. He says that since I am pathologically unable to maintain anything resembling a sane schedule that his only alternative is to…

      HIRE EXTRA HELP!

      That’s right—he forced me to hire a housekeeping service! And he’s making me allow a teen home school student come over to be a “mommy’s helper.” As if I need help or something! Can you believe it?

      So now, I have to go away once a week and when I come home, the Happy Housekeepers have been all over my home—straightening, vacuuming, dusting, cleaning the bathrooms. Yes, they CLEAN my bathrooms! It’s so embarrassing.

      And Tasha, the homeschooler, comes twice a week to tutor and watch Evelyn and Audra so I can take Cassia to dance lessons and Tyler to home school band. (He’s playing the saxophone—isn’t that terrific?)

      My life is ruined. A mom ought to be able to manage running her own household. I didn’t need help. What do these Happy Housekeepers know about my home anyway? Well, other than that Tyler sometimes misses the toilet bowl…

      Oh my goodness! They KNOW my son has bad aim!

      I can never show my face again in public.

      Jocelyn

From:	Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To:	SAHM I Am <[email protected]>
Subject:	Re: [SAHM I AM] TOTW June 1: Total Honesty

      She’s mad that her husband insisted on hiring a housekeeping service? Somebody shoot her.

       Instant Message

      JocelynM: Hey! Be nice!

      Dulcet: I am. I could have said you sounded like Rosalyn. But I didn’t.

      JocelynM: Yeah, okay. You were nice.

      Dulcet: Seriously, what is your problem? I would LOVE to have a housekeeping service. We can’t afford it.

      JocelynM: I just feel like if I’d been doing the job I should be doing, Shane wouldn’t have gone and hired someone else to do it. How would you feel if you had to hire someone else to do your design work for you?

      Dulcet: If I had to hire another designer, I’d be thrilled because it would mean my business is really growing. Most people view hiring as a step up.

       JocelynM: It just feels like a big failure to me. Maybe I *should* be shot.

      Dulcet: I’m sorry.

      JocelynM: I gotta run. Tonight is piano lessons and we have to leave in a half hour.

      Dulcet: Have fun.

       JocelynM signed off at 6:18:04 p.m.

From:	VIM <[email protected]>
To:	SAHM I Am <[email protected]>
Subject:	Re: [SAHM I AM] TOTW June 1: Total Honesty

      Hey Jocelyn,

      Frank and I got ourselves a cleaning lady right after we got married a few years ago. It’s been a lifesaver. Or at least a sanity saver for me, anyway. Don’t know what I would have done without the extra help.

      Don’t worry—once you get used to it, you’ll wonder how you ever survived without it. I can’t remember the last time I actually had to clean the bathroom myself!

      Veronica

From:	Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To:	SAHM I Am <[email protected]>
Subject:	Re: [SAHM I AM] TOTW June 1: Total Honesty

      Can’t remember the last time she had to clean the bathroom? Somebody shoot her, too.

From:	Rosalyn Ebberly <[email protected]>
To:	Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject:	Re: [SAHM I AM] TOTW June 1: Total Honesty

      Dulcie dear,

      You seem a little tense or unhappy about the good fortunes of Jocelyn and Veronica. Do we have a bit of an envy problem?

      I used to feel the same way. But you know what I’ve learned? The key to inner peace is learning to be content. That’s what the Apostle Paul learned—contentment no matter what. Everything is a blessing—even a dirty bathroom! It really is.

      Here’s a challenge for you—the next time you are elbow deep in the toilet bowl, giving it a good scrub, just start praising God for the blessing of having to clean a toilet. And what, you may ask, is there to be thankful for about a dirty toilet?

      It means, dear one, that you have a family to make it dirty. Blessings and peace,

      Rosalyn

      “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Proverbs 14:1 (NASB)

From:	Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To:	“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:	FW note from HMS Pollyanna (see attached)

      Never mind someone else. I’ll shoot her myself.

      Dulcie

From:	P. Lorimer <[email protected]>
To:	SAHM I Am <[email protected]>
Subject:	Re: [SAHM I AM] TOTW June 1: Total Honesty

      Fellow loopers,

      I think this is a wonderful topic. Thanks, Rosalyn!

      Here is my honest confession: I am a pastor’s wife. Rightly or not, we’re held to unreasonably higher standard of behavior than everyone else. But I am also a graduate student with an advisor that, frankly, I can’t stand.

      She was my professor this past semester for a class called Women’s Voices: Misogyny, Religion and Community in Early Modern Europe. It was actually a fascinating study about the cultural and political treatment of women during this time period. I absolutely loved the class. We studied primary sources, private journals

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