LITMIR.BIZ

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much chat about school league tables and the importance of baby violin classes I can stomach, which is, I’ve discovered, not a lot.’

      ‘I’m not surprised. How on earth does a baby get to grips with a violin?’

      ‘I didn’t dare ask.’ She closed her eyes briefly, pinched the bridge of her nose and gave her head a shake of what looked like hopelessness. ‘And they’re the most appalling snobs.’

      ‘Really?’

      She nodded. ‘I’ve never seen such one-upmanship and as for the name-dropping, well, if that were an Olympic sport there’d be golds all round.’

      ‘Then why do you want to impress them?’

      ‘It’s a long and tedious story,’ she said, before pulling her shoulders back and lifting her chin. ‘Let’s just say that I wasn’t exactly the most popular girl at school and I ended up with the bruises to prove it.’

      As the implications of that sank in Dan’s jaw automatically tightened and his hands curled into fists because he knew about that too. His sister, Celia, had been bullied, and even though, unlike this woman, she’d eventually managed to deal with it, it was still a cause for regret that he’d been too busy dealing with the way he’d felt about their parents’ divorce to realise what had been going on.

      ‘I wanted retribution,’ she added.

      ‘I see,’ he said, wishing not for the first time that he could string up every bully who’d ever existed and flog them to within an inch of their lives. ‘So you were aiming for the living-well-being-the-best-revenge kind of thing?’

      ‘Something like that.’

      ‘Then what’s the fix?’

      She blushed and shifted her weight from one foot to the other and then took a deep breath. ‘It didn’t have the impact I was hoping for.’ She stopped. Winced a little, he thought.

      ‘And?’ he prompted.

      ‘And so I invented a boyfriend.’

      His eyebrows shot up. ‘What?’

      She went red. ‘Please don’t make me say it again.’

      ‘OK, but why?’

      ‘Because I figured that that’s the only thing they deem impressive.’ She sighed. ‘It’s totally pathetic, I realise, but I seem to be sixteen all over again and, well, you know...’ She tailed off and shrugged.

      ‘Don’t you have a real one?’

      She flashed him a look of exasperation. ‘If I did I wouldn’t have had to invent one, would I?’

      ‘I suppose not.’ Although why she didn’t when she looked like that and felt like that he had no idea.

      ‘And I certainly wouldn’t have been kissing you.’

      Which would have been a shame, he thought, briefly distracted by the memory of her mouth moving against his. ‘Did it work?’

      ‘Like a dream. Or should I say a nightmare? Things have got a bit out of hand.’

      ‘How?’

      She shook her head as if utterly unable to comprehend what was going on. ‘All I did was mention that I had a boyfriend, but I guess I should have realised they’d descend on that piece of information like a pack of starving hyenas. They started bombarding me with all these questions about what he did and where he was from, and things just kind of snowballed. They even started asking if he was The One.’ She grimaced. ‘I mean, seriously? Don’t they know how statistically unlikely it is that you’ll ever find The One?’

      ‘Presumably not.’

      ‘The chances have been calculated at around one in two-hundred-and-fifty-eight thousand, which I think you’ll agree are not great odds.’

      At her indignation, Dan felt his mouth twitch with the beginnings of a grin. ‘They certainly don’t sound that good.’

      ‘They’re atrocious, and the odds that there’s only one One are even less. But anyway, I was in the middle of extolling my fictitious boyfriend’s virtues, of which there are a great many, naturally—’

      ‘Naturally.’

      ‘When someone said a bit too sceptically for my liking that he sounded too good to be true and it wound me up. So I thought I’d collar the next vaguely presentable man who walked in and ask him to help. Then you showed up, and I thought you’ll do.’

      ‘Charming,’ said Dan dryly, wondering whether he ought to be offended or impressed by her candour.

      She shrugged. ‘Sorry.’

      Settling on the latter, he said, ‘At least you’re honest.’ Which made a refreshing change when it came to the opposite sex.

      ‘Hardly,’ she said, giving him a wry smile. ‘I’ve just spent every one of the last ten minutes lying my head off. I don’t normally, but this evening I seem to have gone a bit off the rails. Hence the kiss,’ she added, and then a look of horror crossed her face and her gaze dropped to his left hand as a thought evidently crossed her mind. ‘God, you’re not married or anything, are you?’

      ‘No.’ Much to his mother’s continual and extremely vocal disappointment.

      ‘Girlfriend?’

      ‘Not at the moment,’ he said, just about managing to hold back the shudder that wanted to run through him at the thought.

      She gave him a bright smile and let out a long breath. ‘Oh, that is a relief.’

      ‘Isn’t it?’ And not just for her. ‘Although if I’d had either I’m not sure they’d have been all that impressed at what just happened.’

      ‘No,’ she conceded. ‘But then you could always have told them I started it.’

      He tilted his head and shot her a sceptical look. ‘Would you settle for that?’

      She stared at him in surprise. ‘Why not? It’s the truth, isn’t it?’

      ‘When does that ever matter?’

      ‘You sound cynical.’

      ‘Just being realistic.’

      ‘Maybe you should get some new friends.’

      ‘Maybe I should.’

      ‘Anyway,’ she said, ‘if I trusted you, of course I’d believe you.’

      She made it sound so simple. ‘Then you’re unlike virtually every woman I’ve ever met.’

      Her smile faded. ‘I expect I am,’ she said with a resigned sigh.

      ‘Which is not necessarily a bad thing.’

      ‘If you say so,’ she muttered, sounding so thoroughly unconvinced and down that he had an unexpected urge to haul her back into his arms and tell her everything was going to be all right.

      Failing to understand what was going on with that, Dan parked it and pulled himself together. ‘What would you have done if I had had a wife or girlfriend?’

      ‘I’m not sure,’ she said, thinking about it for a moment. ‘Slapped you to make it look like an argument and stormed out probably.’

      He winced. ‘Ouch.’

      ‘Quite. So it’s lucky for both of us you don’t, isn’t it?’ She took a step towards him and looked up at him beseechingly, and as her scent wound through him his head briefly swam. ‘So what do you think?’ she asked softly. ‘Will you help me out and play the part of my besotted boyfriend for a bit or do I need to slink out and hope I don’t see any of that lot ever again?’

      THREE

      Absolutely

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