LITMIR.BIZ

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he settling in?’ Rhys asked.

      Lily grinned. ‘Really well, I think. Seems to have his whole life planned out here.’

      Well, if he had, he hadn’t told his own cousin much about it. Although he seemed perfectly happy spilling to her best friend.

      ‘And how’s Edward?’ Cora asked. Maybe Lily needed the reminder of the most important man in her life.

      But Lily just shrugged. ‘Okay, I guess. To be honest, he’s been working so much I haven’t seen much of him, really.’

      She was frowning. Frowning and looking away again. Cora felt something cold settle in her chest. ‘Any further along with the wedding planning?’

      Lily reached for her wine. ‘Not really. Edward’s talking about the golf club for the reception.’

      Well, it wouldn’t be Cora’s choice, but it was a perfectly serviceable venue. ‘I suppose it’s pretty short notice now. For you to get married this summer, I mean.’ Because that was what they’d agreed. That was the plan. The two of them, both marrying the loves of their lives, starting their futures together, this summer.

      ‘I guess.’

      ‘You really should get a date confirmed, you know,’ Cora went on. ‘Even for a small wedding, you’re going to need the time to get it all sorted out. Maybe you could look at early autumn.’ That wouldn’t be so bad. She and Rhys would be back from their honeymoon, then, ready to pitch in and help get everything ready. Early autumn could work.

      Lily gave her a very small, very tired smile. ‘You’re starting to sound like Edward. Or my mother.’

      Lily had just compared her to Evelyn Thomas. Something was very, very wrong here.

      But before Cora could find a response, Rhys clapped his hands together, grabbed the wine and said, ‘That’s it. No more wedding talk tonight. Let’s try and remember what we used to talk about before we got engaged.’

      As Lily and Rhys started chatting about some new TV programme, Cora prodded at the remains of her salmon and thought about the only other time she and Lily hadn’t done things together, and how wrong that had gone.

      She had to get Lily to set a date.

      * * * *

      Alex didn’t believe in wasting time. He’d promised Max a proper portfolio in less than a week’s time, so he’d better get on with compiling one. Pushing Gareth’s weirdness out of his mind, he headed home to his ramshackle cottage to dig out his equipment and student shots. And, two hours later, felt rather less enthusiastic about the whole endeavour.

      No, he told himself, even as he opened a cold beer from his otherwise empty fridge. He’d come home to Felinfach to start a new life, and the photography was a big part of that. So he would bloody well make it work, one way or another.

      Slumping back onto his sofa, he flicked through the photos again. Not good enough. Oh, they were fine for student work, and his teacher had loved them, but they weren’t going to cut it in the professional arena. He needed proper shots he could sell as demonstrations of his talent. He’d better hope the inhabitants of the Mill were willing to take him up on his offer of free publicity shots.

      He slumped back against the cushions, wondering what had possessed him to buy such a huge sofa. It was practically the only piece of furniture he had bought since he arrived, mostly making do with his parents’ old stuff, and it dominated the lounge. He’d ordered it to be delivered the day he moved in, and it was a million miles away from the smart leather armchairs he’d left behind in his flat in London. Maybe he’d been imagining snuggling up with his prospective bride-to-be, or at least bringing someone home. So far, the only girl he’d spent any time at all with was Lily.

      Which brought him back to tomorrow again.

      Why was he resisting thinking about it? She was an old family friend, and a business opportunity. And if she’d glowed across the table at lunch, talking about her dreams and everything she and Max had achieved with the Mill, and how much more they wanted to do… Well, it didn’t matter. Because she was engaged to another man, and Alex took that sort of thing seriously. Very seriously.

      No, this was a purely professional arrangement, he told himself, draining the last of his beer. And he was still telling himself that the following morning when he entered the wrought iron gates of the Mill. Right up until he walked into Tiger Lily and saw Lily’s eyes as she looked up to greet him. Red-rimmed and heavy-lidded, she obviously hadn’t slept. And, from his limited experience with such things, he was pretty sure she’d been crying.

      All thoughts of portfolios and photography went out of his head. Alex dropped his bag by the door, crossed swiftly to the desk, and placed a hand on her shoulder, the most comfort he could manage with the desk between them. ‘What did he do?’

      Lily shook her head, blonde strands of hair fluttering in front of her face. ‘He didn’t… It’s not him. It’s me.’

      ‘If he told you that you should have slapped him.’

      That got him a smile, at least. ‘No, really. He wanted to talk about the wedding when I got back from Cora’s last night, and I… didn’t.’

      A sense of unease rose in Alex’s chest. ‘Why not?’

      ‘Because… Oh I don’t know. Because I’m not sure he wants to marry me for the right reasons, I suppose.’

      ‘The right reasons?’ That wasn’t what he’d expected to hear. He’d expected because I don’t love him. Or because I’m not ready to get married. Not the right reasons. What were the right reasons, anyway?

      Lily sighed, her whole body slumping forward a little as she brushed her hair out of her eyes. ‘I don’t know. It just seems… I think he only proposed to me because getting married is what we’re supposed to do now. We’re at the right age, our friends are all getting married. Maybe he even thinks it’ll help him with his job. But it’s not…’

      ‘Because he loves you,’ Alex finished for her, his heart like lead in his chest. Wasn’t that just what he was doing? Deciding he was ready to settle down, and seeking the perfect person to settle down with him? Hell, he’d even bought a settling-down sofa.

      But he’d forgotten about love in there, somewhere.

      Leaning heavily against the desk, he lifted his hand to run it across Lily’s pale hair, silky soft under his fingers. ‘Did you tell him what’s worrying you?’

      ‘I tried.’ His fingers caught in a knot, and she smiled up at him as he untangled first himself, and then her hair. It was a watery smile, but still better than anything he’d seen so far that morning. ‘He didn’t seem to understand.’

      Because the man was an idiot. Clearly. How could you forget the importance of loving Lily Thomas?

      ‘What did he say?’

      Lily sighed. ‘He was frustrated, I guess. He just said that if we love each other, and we do, then this is what happens next. Like it’s a compulsory step or something. Something to get through, rather than a celebration of, well, anything.’

      She looked so uncomfortable at the idea, Alex didn’t want to push – even though part of him wanted to tell her to run, far and fast and now. If she was so uncertain and unhappy now, how would she feel in a year’s time? Or five years, or ten?

      But it wasn’t his place. So all he asked was, ‘How did you leave it?’

      ‘He had to rush off for work. Said we’d go look at venues next weekend, if I was so set against having it at the golf club.’ Her laugh was bitter. ‘I’m pretty sure the message didn’t get through.’

      Resisting the urge to find and punch Edward was, Alex thought, a true sign he’d grown as a person. But it was still bloody tempting.

      ‘So, I guess you’re not in the mood to

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