Scout's Honor - Stephanie Doyle

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and that only happened when he was really drunk or really desperate.

      “Jayson, I think...”

      But he was done waiting. He put his cock against her opening and started to push. He felt her wetness, knew she was aroused, but he hadn’t expected her to be so tight.

      “Scout...”

      It was like her body was pushing back against him. It was maddening.

      “Honey, you’ve got to open for me a little...”

      “I’m trying.”

      Trying? What the hell did that mean, but before he could think about it, he had the head of his erection inside her and he was pushing again. Then he heard her cry out and it froze him solid.

      “Scout.”

      “It burns,” she said with her arm over her eyes.

      Instantly, he slid out of her. Then he looked down on her face and saw she was in agony.

      “No, don’t stop. You can’t stop! You have to finish it.”

      She was reaching for his hips and sliding her butt up his legs as if she might try to impale herself on him. He caught her body and turned her on her side so that they were facing each other.

      “Please, don’t stop,” she cried.

      Tears. Actual tears. He was the worst lover ever. Obviously he’d gone too fast for her. He thought she’d been with him. She was obviously not even close to being ready.

      “Scout, it’s okay,” he said even though the ache in his balls was extreme. “I’ll slow down. Get you more ready.”

      “I am ready.” She sobbed. “Please, just do it. There’s nothing you can do that won’t hurt.”

      Oh, hell. Did she have some kind of physical condition? Something that prevented her from enjoying sex?

      “Scout, honey, you need to talk to me. Is there some kind of problem I need to know about?”

      “Yes, I have a problem. And you need to fix it,” she said urgently. She hooked her leg over his hip and dropped her hand down to his cock.

      He caught her hand and stopped her wiggling it. “Scout, I’m not going to hurt you. I won’t do it.”

      “But you have to. It’s the only way.”

      Huh? Nothing she was saying was making sense and she was getting more and more upset. What was supposed to be a night of hot, intense sex was turning ugly quickly.

      “Please, I just want it done.”

      Not something any guy ever wanted to hear when it came to sex. Jayson rolled on his back as he tried figure out what was happening.

      But as soon as he did, Scout was climbing on top of him.

      “Scout, wait...”

      “No, I’m done waiting. It’s okay.” She reached for him again and placed his erection at her core. Then she pushed herself forcibly over him, whimpering the entire time.

      “Scout, stop it! You’re hurting yourself!”

      But she didn’t stop. Not until he was fully inside her. It was a horrible moment to both see her pain and feel his pleasure. But she was squeezing him like a vice and his cock was an unfeeling bastard.

      “There,” she huffed out, lying on top of him. “It’s done.”

      Done? Nothing was done. He was still hard, and she clearly was nowhere close to having an orgasm.

      “What’s done?” he grated out.

      “I’m not a virgin anymore. You can finish now. I’m sure it will be better next time.”

      A virgin.

      Of course. And with that sentence she wiggled on top of him and it was enough to make him come furiously inside her. Without one real stroke.

      Without a doubt the worst sex of his life. All he’d done was hurt her.

       CHAPTER FIVE

      “SCOUT, HOLD UP,” Jayson called to her as he pulled up to the house.

      She was done listening to him. She had had the passenger door open as soon as the car had come to a stop and now she was practically running up the driveway.

      “Scout, you’re going to have to talk to me eventually! Stop behaving like a child and turn around.”

      That got her to stop and offer him a succinct nonverbal response.

      “Yeah, that’s mature,” he sneered.

      “I’m done fighting,” she said. “Go home and give me some space.”

      “Fine, you take your space but I’m not going anywhere. Okay? Tell me you know that.”

      She shook her head. He’d pulled over the car to yell at her for not taking a chance on him and now he wanted her to know he wasn’t going anywhere. As if to say that if she did need him he would be here for her.

      Because he still cared.

       I loved you...

      She couldn’t say how much the past tense of that phrase destroyed her. All she wanted to do was run home, lock herself in her room, put the covers over her head and stay there. Forever.

      She’d been wrong to think she was strong enough to reenter the world. Wrong to think she could spend the day with Jayson without getting her heart split open.

      “Tell me, Scout. So I know you believe it.”

      She looked at him then, really looked at him, and saw how earnest he was. It was one of his most endearing qualities.

      “You’re not going anywhere,” she repeated.

      He nodded and she could tell he wanted to say more but it was as if he’d decided he’d said enough for a day.

      “I’ll see you around.”

      “I guess,” Scout conceded. Recognizing that this was her life now. There was no Duff, but there was Jayson potentially around every corner.

      Her room, her bed, her blanket beckoned.

      She turned away from him and walked inside only to find her mother at the kitchen counter chopping carrots and Bob sitting at the table, seemingly content to spend time with his wife while she cooked. They were smiling as if their conversation had been amusing to both of them. It reminded Scout how much her mother and Bob actually liked each other. Beyond the love, they were best friends.

      A real, loving relationship. A shame it had to come at the expense of Duff.

      An unforgivable sin in Scout’s eyes. It didn’t seem right that Scout should have to suffer this on top of everything else. Losing Duff, having to deal with Jayson, living with her traitorous mother. None of it was fair.

      “I want you two to leave.” Scout looked at both of them to show them she meant it.

      Alice and Bob exchanged a glance, communicating silently, once again showing how in sync they were.

      “We’ve talked about this, Scout,” Alice said carefully. “I’m not leaving until I think you’re ready.”

      “Can’t you for five seconds think that maybe your being here is making it worse? I mean, what am I supposed to do, just watch you and Bob living happily right in front of me? You want to show me up close how Duff was a horrible husband and Bob is the shit? Maybe I’ll start to see things your way. Is that what you were thinking? That Bob and I will be buds and I’ll forget Duff ever lived?”

      “Don’t be ridiculous. What happened this afternoon? Did Jayson do something

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