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Triumph Over Adversity 3-in-1 Collection. Casey Watson
Читать онлайн.Название Triumph Over Adversity 3-in-1 Collection
Год выпуска 0
isbn 9780007576937
Автор произведения Casey Watson
Жанр Биографии и Мемуары
Издательство HarperCollins
‘I wish,’ I said. ‘But you know what it’s like. You just can’t get the staff.’
I was always full of good intentions on the ‘bring a sandwich in and save money’ front, me, but they never got further than exactly that – intentions. ‘I tell you what,’ I said. ‘Any chance you could grab me something from the vending machine while you’re around and about? And I tell you what,’ I added softly, as a thought suddenly struck me, ‘take your time. Because it occurs to me there might be a reason why Imogen wants to stay put in here today, mightn’t there?’
And, as it turned out, there was.
I made myself a coffee and, as Imogen sat nibbling her sandwich, nose in book, I pondered this development and what it meant. Imogen had always gone to lunch with Shona and Molly. That had been a constant. Every single day. So this business of bringing in a sandwich – what did it mean? Assuming it did mean anything more than just school-meals refusal, then it would be something she had planned in advance. Of course, it could just be that her nan was on a money saving/healthy eating/change of routine kick, but were that the case then I was fairly sure Imogen already knew that she could take her packed lunch and eat it in the hall.
No, there was a reason behind this. The question was – what should I do? Should I get on with some work, drink my coffee, sit it out till she told me? Or go across to her and ask her if something was bothering her?
The latter, I decided. After all, she had already taken the most difficult step, hadn’t she? No, the next step had to come from me.
Those words she had first spoken to me still weighed on my mind. ‘I thought she was going to …’ What? Come back home to me? Take me with her? Stay in touch? Because I was sure that the ‘she’ in question must be her absent mother and I was equally sure that this woman – whoever she was – was responsible for Imogen’s current trauma. And that was hardly surprising, was it? After all, by all accounts she’d already been the target for bullies, in the way redheads like her – unbelievably, and so cruelly – were. When, exactly, was that ever going to stop? But, on top of that, for her mother to just up and leave like she did, well, I had little doubt that that would be the straw that had broken the camel’s back. How would a child manage to assimilate and cope with such rejection? How could they? This was her mother and she’d just disappeared. No wonder the poor kid was so damaged.
But I was about to find out I was wrong. I went to the biscuit tin by the kettle and fished out a couple of biscuits to eat with my coffee. They were probably stale, as I hadn’t stocked up in a while, but they’d keep me going till Kelly returned. They’d also make it look less like I was going over to conduct an interrogation and more like we were being companionable over lunch.
I then went over, sat down at the other side of the table, took a bite out of one of the soggy biscuits, then said, ‘Mmm, just what I needed. You okay, sweetie?’
The effect was instantaneous. Imogen carefully replaced the uneaten half of her sandwich in her lunchbox, then said, ‘No, not really, Miss.’
Just like that. I was stunned. And her big eyes were still on me.
‘I understand, love,’ I started. ‘And I kind of guessed that today. That picture you painted this morning … All red and angry … Is it your mum?’ I added gently.
She looked confused. And hadn’t spoken. Was she going to shut down again?
‘Your painting?’ I tried again. ‘Was that about your mum leaving? I’m sure I’d feel angry too … You said it represented anger, remember?’
But she was now shaking her head. ‘Yes. I mean, no. I mean it’s not about my mum.’
‘It’s not?’
‘No. I always kind of knew she would leave.’
Now it was my turn to be confused. Had I got this whole thing completely wrong? ‘So that’s not what’s upsetting you? Your mum and dad splitting up?’
She shook her head again. And now her face began crumpling, her features falling in on themselves.
‘Oh, sweetheart, don’t cry,’ I said, getting up and going round to where Shona usually sat, next to her. ‘I’m sorry,’ I said, sitting beside her. ‘I didn’t want to upset you. I just thought that it must be your mum leaving that started this all off. And if it’s not … sweetie, you must tell me. If you tell me I might be able to help you.’
‘That’s just it!’ she said, her voice stronger than at any time since she’d come to us. ‘You can’t help me, Miss. No one can!’ She was properly sobbing now so I put an arm round her and pulled her in close. ‘It’s her!’ she said. ‘Gerri! She hates me! And I hate her too! And my dad is so stupid!’ she gulped. ‘He thinks the sun shines out of her backside but she’s a horrible witch!’
I digested all this while I held her. It was an incredible amount to have said and I could tell she’d meant every word of it. So the grandmother was right on that score, at least. Her granddaughter did hate her step-mum. Which was natural in itself. Almost mandatory, sometimes. For taking her dad away? For pushing her out? For merely existing?’
‘Oh, sweetheart,’ I said. ‘You know, I can tell just how much you’re hurting. And I know how hard it must be for you, all of it. First your mum leaving and then your dad meeting someone new – aren’t adults a pain, eh? And I know how difficult it can be to adjust to all that new stuff. All the changes. Having to get used to this stranger being in your life – specially if you don’t agree with dad’s choices … but, you know what? Nothing’s changed between you and your dad – I know that. You will always be his little girl, and he will always love you, and what you have to do is …’
‘NO!’ The word was shouted, and as Imogen uttered it she pushed me away. ‘No!’ she repeated, sobbing. ‘You’re just as bad as my nan and grandad! Nobody ever listens to me! What’s the point of talking to anyone if nobody ever listens to me!’
It was a shocking and sudden outburst and it seemed she’d done with me. Turning her body away from me she immediately snatched up her book and started pretending to read it. I could tell she wasn’t really doing so because her eyes were still so full of tears. But, even so, I had clearly been dismissed.
But the only response was to soldier right on. ‘I am so sorry, love,’ I tried, speaking mainly to her curtain of hair, ‘but if you don’t tell me what is wrong, how can I possibly understand? If I have it all wrong then you have to put me right. And I will listen, Imogen. Honestly, I will.’
But that, it seemed, was that. I was persona non gratis. She seemed determined to completely ignore me. Blank expression, head down, ‘don’t come near me’ demeanour. An impenetrable shield, but shielding what?
I went back to my desk, taking my remaining one and a half soggy biscuits with me, and praying I hadn’t completely blown it. That we weren’t back to square one as far as speaking was concerned. And I had a good 20 minutes in which to ponder what to do about it, before Kelly breezed back in, bearing a ‘Well?’ kind of expression, a tuna mayo sandwich and a chocolate bar.
‘Greetings!’ she announced to the classroom in general. ‘I bring a gift from the dinner-lady gods!’
Imogen didn’t even lift her head. Not a millimetre.
The next couple of days were strained, to say the least. Though Imogen continued to make progress with her mutism in class – answering direct questions from both me and Kelly, and interacting with the rest of the kids to the extent that she’d been doing before, it was as if a light had gone out behind her eyes. Gone were the accompanying smiles I’d begun to enjoy when she spoke to me; now