LITMIR.BIZ

       Public Inconvenience

       A nuclear family is browsing through the bathroom displays at their local DIY store.

      DAD: That’d look good.

      MUM: Dunno. Might be a bit, you know.

      DAD: Suppose so.

      DAUGHTER: Mummy, I used the loo!

      MUM: (to Dad). What do you think of that tub? Not the taps just the tub.

      DAD: I don’t like the taps.

      MUM: Not the taps, just the tub.

      DAD: It’s just a tub, isn’t it?

      DAUGHTER: Mummy, Mummy! I used the loo.

      MUM: Shhhhh! Yes, darling, I heard you the first time. Look, I’ll take you in a minute. Mummy and Daddy want to look at the bathtubs.

       Their baby son in his pushchair begins to whine.

      DAD: Oh now look!

      DAUGHTER: Mummy, I did it in the loo.

      MUM: Isabelle, stop shouting! Look, you’ve woken your brother now! All Daddy and me wanted to do was to have five minutes looking at bathtubs, but oh no! Come on then, madam, let’s find you a loo.

      DAUGHTER: Mummy, I used the loo!

      DAD: What is she talking about?

      MUM: I don’t know, she says she used the—Oh. Isabelle, darling, which loo did you use?

      DAUGHTER: (pointing to a display) That one!

      MUM: Oh you didn’t. Tell me you didn’t.

       She opens the loo lid.

      MUM: Oh for god’s sake, Isabelle!