LITMIR.BIZ

      Chapter Three

      As new man on the job, Joe worked third shift. Ten-thirty at night until six-thirty in the morning.

      He should have spent the day sleeping, but instead he spent it tossing and turning.

      By five-thirty, as he waited outside Louisa’s store, he was a wreck.

      So many questions he wanted to ask. So many details he wanted filled in.

      She opened the door and looked surprised to see him there. “Joe, I thought you weren’t coming.”

      “I said I’d be here.”

      “Yes, yes you did.” She was quiet a minute, studying him. “Let’s go over to the diner. I’ll buy you a coffee.”

      “Is that a polite way of saying I look like I need one?”

      “It’s a polite way of saying you look like hell.” The comment was softened with a weak smile.

      “You always were direct.”

      “I still am.”

      They walked across the square to The Five and Dine.

      “Cute,” he said as he looked around.

      It was decorated like something out of Happy Days, right down to a vintage jukebox.

      “I like it,” she said as she led him to a small booth in the back.

      A waitress followed right on their heels. “Hey, Louisa.”

      “Hi, Missy. Could I have a coffee?”

      “Sure. And you?” the girl asked Joe.

      “Same.” As soon as she was out of earshot, he asked, “You said something about an idea.”

      He needed this settled. He didn’t want to waste another minute waiting to be with his son.

      Louisa nodded. “I had to ask first, but…” She sighed. “There’s so much we have to talk about.”

      “Yeah, like why you left. Why you kept my son from me. None of your explanations have answered all the questions. As a matter of fact, they just raise more. Why—”

      “Joe, it was so long ago, and I’ve changed so much since then, but I still remember what it was like.”

      “What what was like?” he asked.

      “Growing up as Clancy’s kid. I remember feeling as if I’d never be more than that and wondering what you saw in me. Whatever it was you saw, I didn’t see it in myself. When I found out I was pregnant, I’d never been so afraid. It wasn’t that I was afraid of the baby, or even what people would say—they’d been talking all my life. I was afraid of losing you.”

      “Why? How could you think I wouldn’t stand by you?”

      The waitress brought their coffee and said, “Holler if you need something else.”

      “Joe,” Louisa said, as soon as the woman was out of earshot, “when we talked about the future, you said repeatedly how much you didn’t want kids.”

      “I was young and I was afraid I’d be like my parents. I thought I couldn’t take the chance. But I’d never have abandoned you.”

      How could she have said she loved him and not known even that much about him?

      “But at the time, all I knew was that I didn’t measure up to you or your family and I was pregnant and you didn’t want kids. I was so scared. But I planned to tell you. It took me a couple weeks to work up to it, but I’d planned it all out. We were supposed to go out that night and I even memorized what I was going to say. But then I saw the paper.”

      “The engagement announcement?”