Leading With NLP: Essential Leadership Skills for Influencing and Managing People - Joseph O’Connor

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history. They also differ from culture to culture. For example, the American individualistic and challenging style of leadership is very different from the Japanese style of leadership. A good leader in Japan seeks consensus; they call it nema washi, meaning ‘digging around the roots’. The phrase comes from the practice of cutting around a tree a few weeks before you want to move it. The cut roots start sprouting new growth, so when they move the tree, new growth takes hold straight away. The cutting also prepares the tree more gradually for the move than uprooting it in one go. But if they find too many roots, that is, a host of objections, Japanese leaders tend to withdraw and continue discussions. They will not usually bring an issue to a vote until they feel that most people will agree. The debate is over before the meeting.

      Whatever their style, something that all leaders share is influence. We may see influential people on television, in films, in politics or at work, meet them socially or read about them in the press. We may admire them and want to copy them because they get things done, they stand for something important, something we want to be part of. We bestow ‘leadership’ on them. So leadership does not exist as an independent quality; it only exists between people. It describes a relationship. ‘Followers’ are the other half of leaders. They go together.

      Leadership has long been associated with authority – we tend to concentrate on the leader, to think of them as innately superior in some way, and take the followers for granted. But formal authority is only one possible part of leadership. Many leaders do not have it. In some cases, perhaps ‘companionship’ better describes the relationship between leader and followers.

      As leadership connects people in this way, I do not think it can be fully modelled from the outside by giving lists of how leaders act, culled from the study of other leaders. It can only be modelled from the inside, by each of us developing the values, beliefs and qualities we need to realize and achieve our purpose in life, to bring out our vision of what is possible. Then others will join us. We will be leaders first to ourselves and then to our companions.

      Thought Experiment I

      How do you think of ‘leadership’? What comes into your mind? Try it now.

      

      What are the qualities of your mental picture?

      Is it still or moving?

      How far away does it appear to be?

      Is it in colour or black and white?

      Are you in the picture?

      How do you feel about your picture?

      

      ‘Leadership’ an abstract noun and for many people the word conjures up a still picture, a frieze of troops on the battlefield or sometimes a symbol.

      

      Now think of ‘leading’.

      

      What comes into your mind?

      What are the qualities of your mental picture now?

      How are they different?

      How do you feel about this picture?

      

      ‘Leading’ is a verb and that means action, movement.

      Your mental pictures can spring to life.

      When you think about ‘leadership’, remember the reality behind the word – leaders act. They move towards something. They excite action; they transform people and change how they think. Leadership as an abstract noun languishes as a theoretical concept with no life or movement – interesting, but kept safely at arm’s length like a museum exhibit.2

      Think of a leader. Who comes to mind? A military leader like the Duke of Wellington, Napoleon, Winston Churchill or General Schwartzkopf? A political leader like Tony Blair, President Kennedy, Margaret Thatcher or Bill Clinton? Or a religious leader like Christ, Mohammed and the Buddha? What of the humanitarian leaders like Mother Teresa and Albert Schweitzer, popular charismatic figures like Princess Diana, or film stars, music stars or top figures in the world of fashion?

      Leaders form a very varied group, all strong characters who arouse passions both for and against. Yet they all have something in common that defines them as leaders – they have influence. They move people.

      Leadership starts with a vision, a tantalizing glimpse of a possible future. A vision sounds very grand, but it has just two simple qualities: it inspires you to act, and involves and inspires others to act as well.

      We all have our individual visions; leadership is about taking those and developing them into something greater, more fulfilling and more influential. We all try to shape the future by striving to make our dreams real. The question is, what dreams are you making real right now and are they really worthwhile? If you are not making your dreams real, why not?

      Think of the future like a dark cave – Aladdin’s cave. You wait, poised on the threshold. The cave goes back into the darkness, swallowing the shadows cast by the pool of light at the entrance. The atmosphere is full of possibilities; you hear stealthy sounds. You know both treasures and dangers exist here, but neither what nor where they are. Some objects in the cave are within easy reach and many people are content to stay at the entrance, happy with what they can take from the ante-room. But to find greater treasure you need to trust yourself to walk further into the cave.

      There is no light switch here, only your ideas can provide the light to see further. You are the leader here. Perhaps there are others clustered by the entrance waiting to hear what you find, or create.

      Aladdin’s cave

      Your ideas burn brightly for an instant, like a flare, and just for a second you and the others glimpse the riches around you and some of the guardians that you will have to overcome later. The flare dies and you rub your eyes, but the image persists in your mind, the impression stays with you. You know what you want and you know the direction in which it lies.

      The initial flaring light has died down and become a torch, not so bright, but light enough to navigate by. People join you from the doorway and together you make your way into the depths of the cave. They light their own torches from yours as they go. Soon you have much more light, you can see further. No wonder more people are attracted to your band – you have plenty of light and you know where you are going. You make more detailed maps, the cave becomes more familiar. And still you have that first bright image in your mind that you can rekindle when the journey becomes hard and you meet unforeseen obstacles and guardians.

      The cave changes while you move, you create new challenges, new pitfalls and new shortcuts by your advance. Sometimes you have to light another flare. You may be drawn deep into the cave, through fantastic landscapes. You may travel to the end of cul-desacs, or be distracted by superficially attractive but worthless trinkets at the side of the road, or even discover places you want to stay, but whatever happens you are committed to the journey, to going forward. You do not go back.

      The same process powers our vision of a better life or a more competitive business. A leader always leads somewhere, even when the journey is inspired by a desire to get out of trouble. For example, 1992 was a disastrous year for the American retailer Sears, Roebuck and Company. They made a net loss of nearly four billion dollars, most of it in merchandising, on sales of just over 50 billion dollars. Sears was turned around spectacularly the following year by Arthur Martinez, who was head of the merchandising group, and in 1995 became CEO of the whole company. Starting from a simple vision statement of what was called ‘the three Cs’ – ‘making Sears a compelling place to shop, a compelling place to work and a compelling place to invest’ – the company went from the net loss of four billion dollars to a net income of 752 million dollars

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