Digital Etiquette For Dummies - Eric Butow

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find that you can’t get your point across in the current medium. For example, you’ve probably had a long email conversation with quotes from previous messages stretching endlessly in the email window. Or maybe a conversation has devolved into an argument because neither of you understands what the other is saying. In that case, it’s time to set up either a phone conversation or an online chat via an app so that you can talk with each other in person.

      

An online chat app may be the best way to gain some clarity because you both can see each other’s faces (as well as some helpful nonverbal cues) on your webcams. These cues can help both of you understand what the other is feeling and help you create a solution.

      Eating: Shielding meeting participants from your eating habits

      Do you like to hear other people gobbling their food during an online meeting? (Hearing yourself eat may be bad enough.) Then consider that other people on your Microsoft Teams call may not like hearing your slurps and smacks.

      Even if you turn off your microphone, they have to watch you, and we’ll bet you dollars to (ahem) doughnuts that you dislike watching other people eat as much as they dislike watching you. And if you’re eating and a bunch of lettuce falls out of your burger, that means you have to leave the meeting and clean up. Not very professional, don’t you think?

      So, if you’re setting up an online meeting with Zoom, Microsoft Teams, or a similar app and everyone can see each other on their webcams, set expectations about food or drink ahead of time. Don’t assume (and we know the saying about the word assume) that everyone will adhere to the rules. Make it clear that there will be no eating of snacks, doughnuts, or any other meal during the meeting.

Should you ban drinks during online meetings, too? That’s harder to do because, in an in-person meeting, people usually bring drinks so that they avoid feeling parched, and they will push back against any directive not to have drinks. You still run the same risk of having drinks in a virtual meeting as in an in-person meeting, so be consistent — if you allow beverages in an in-person meeting, allow them in your virtual meeting, too.

      Telephone: Paying attention to the conversation and your behavior

      You remember the telephone, don’t you? You still use it on your smartphone to speak with people. Many companies still rely on voice calls to interact with their customers, and even people in office settings have phones with receivers you pick up.

      When you talk on the phone, you need to be aware of not only the conversation but also your behavior. This section details what we mean.

      Follow this general guidance

      In any call, here are some good rules to follow:

       Answer the call within three rings.

       If you can’t answer the call within three rings, it means you’re busy and letting the call go to your voicemail so that you can refer to it later.

       Speaking of voicemail, record your greeting in your own voice that’s reasonably cheerful. Be sure to tell people that you can’t pick up the phone right now and ask them for any information you need, such as their name, a brief description, and/or their phone number.

       Check your voicemail when you can, perhaps on a schedule. For example, you may want to check it once in the morning and once in the afternoon.

       Use your speakerphone only when it’s absolutely necessary — and only if you’re in a quiet place.

       When you call someone to talk, tell them the purpose of the call. If the other person doesn’t agree with the purpose, you need to come to an agreement before you can start the call.

       Speak clearly. This advice should be obvious, but it’s easy to become lazy and start talking like you’re in the same room with the other person — at least until they jolt you back to reality when they loudly ask, “What?”

       Use proper language. This advice should also be self-evident, but you need to pay attention to it before you start using language you would use only with your friends and not in a professional setting.

       Actively listen and take notes. By actively listen, we mean that you may want to repeat what someone says to ensure that you understand them. And you can type as you talk to make sure you’re taking notes, though that’s harder to do with a speakerphone than a headset, because the speakerphone may be close to your keyboard.

      Help your customers

      For customer service calls, we have more tips to share with you:

       Immediately introduce yourself when you pick up the call. Also ask who you’re speaking with.

       Be friendly, but if you can’t do that, at least be neutral — unless you want to rile your customer enough that they decide to complain and your life becomes more difficult than it already is.

       Listen to your volume level. If you’re starting to talk more loudly because the environment around you is growing louder, your customer may start to complain that you’re yelling at them. So you may need to move the call to another location.

       Before you move your call to another location, ask the other person for permission to put them on hold or to transfer a call. The reason might be the noise of your environment or the need to find more information to be able to give the customer the right answer (or to forward them to the person who has it).

      

You may find people who have problems speaking on the phone. Maybe they detest talking by phone or they have medical issues that prevent them from talking or listening for any length of time (if at all). There may be times when you have to speak by phone, but in that case, respect the other person by being brief — and perhaps by sending any follow-up questions by email or text message. Or, if a person doesn’t want to chat with you using a webcam on Zoom or another online chat app, many of those apps have live text chats so that you can still speak without video. Being flexible can help you gain brownie points with both customers and coworkers.

      The Legal Ins and Outs of Etiquette

      IN THIS CHAPTER

      

Exploring communication law

      

Reviewing communication policies

      

Setting and respecting boundaries in all communication

      The wild west days of communicating online are coming to an end, and more laws are setting boundaries on what you can and can’t do (on pain of imprisonment). Despite the laws on the books and more laws being considered as we write this book, there are still other unwritten rules of online communication — just as they are in real life — that you need to know about.

      In this chapter, we talk about federal laws governing online behavior in the United States as a whole as well as state laws (including laws in our home state of California), but we promise to keep the legal jargon to a minimum.

      Next, we tell you about the policies your company needs to follow to make sure you don’t run afoul of any regulations. We wrap up this chapter by telling you

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