LITMIR.BIZ

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I have short legs, Alice added. I would like to have your size and your legs.

       - I have big thighs and a big ass.

       - The erotic dream of many men, giggled Alice, making me blush like a tomato.

       - Felicity, as you can see, you're not the only one who doesn't feel flawless or perfect. We have our doubts too, but we've decided to accept ourselves as we are, Kira whispered, placing a hand on my arm.

       - I'm sure Easton and Lucas don't think like you.

       - One day you too will find someone who will see you for what you are and think you're beautiful.

       - Okay. I gathered my courage and approached the burning candle. So, I want a boy like Easton and Lucas, one who loves me for who I am. I wish for a love story with a capital L.

       I blew out the candle, looked up and found myself facing two pairs of worried eyes staring back at me.

       I was alarmed. "What's wrong with you?

       - A boy like Easton and Lucas ?! Are you crazy? exploded Alice.

       Would you really want a shady, hard-to-manage guy like my Lucas? I was thinking of someone more level-headed and kinder.

       - The opposite of that creep Easton! interjected Alice. I hope your wish doesn't come true or you'll be in serious trouble.

       - You're scaring me... This birthday looks like the prologue to a horror movie, I fidgeted.

       - No, excuse us. It's just that you surprised us a bit, because Alice and I have a complicated relationship with our boyfriend, and neither of us ever thought that someone could wish for a relationship like ours,” Kira explained to me softly, while Alice nodded with conviction at every word our friend said.

       I never imagined how hard it could be to be with Lucas or Easton, but I preferred not to ask questions and diverted attention to the cake.

       I cut three equal pieces and together we surrendered to this nirvana for our taste buds.

      “ - This cake is divine, but I'm sure you can do better,” Alice whispered as she savored the dessert.

       I smiled, embarrassed, because I was not yet used to sharing my love for cooking with anyone. But when Alice found out I was in the college cooking class, I started using my friends as guinea pigs for my culinary experiments, which both girls always defined as a drug. It was an honor to have someone eat what I cooked, and lately it had pushed me to improve more and try new flavors.

      “ Felicity!” That unexpected voice and stern tone had the ability to paralyze me and make me not want to eat. I turned around with a feeling of being on the verge of an abyss.

       When my eyes fell on the slim, perfect figure of my sister Ava, I felt myself dying.

       I wanted to get up and push her out of the building before she could open her mouth, but I was glued to the chair and felt my throat catch fire from the anger triggered by what would surely happen soon.

      “ Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends? she became impatient with my silence.

       - Ava, my sister. This is Kira and Alice. They go to college with me and…

       - You are friends?” surprised Ava, giving me the first blow. For her, it was inconceivable that a pretty girl would hang out with an ugly one. And if she did, it was only to show off, to be highlighted by a less attractive friend. I noticed the look in her eyes and read her accusation: “They're just using you.”

       Ava wasn't mean, but she had her own mentality and firmly believed that the world was divided into beautiful and ugly. Two absolutely distinct categories.

      “ - Yes,” I tried to answer, but the words came out with difficulty and my cheeks grew hot with embarrassment.

      “ - So, why didn't you invite them to the birthday party tonight? Mom and Dad wouldn't mind, you know? They'd be happy to have a few extra guests.”

       I turned quickly to Kira and Alice. The disappointment in their eyes made me blush with embarrassment, because I had told them that there would be no party with my family.

       The truth was that these two girls were my friends. And they had to stay that way, instead of ending up trapped by my mother's charm, Ava and Bethany.

       I didn't want to share them with anyone, and most of all, I didn't want them to be able to see that side of me that was just a big black hole, a nobody who didn't even deserve the attentions of her own parents.

      “ I thought Mom only wanted to invite Sandy's friends. I tried to talk myself out of it.

       - The party for Sandy was over two hours ago. You made the cake. Don't you remember?

       - I forgot, I lied.

       - Maybe if you ate less junk food, you wouldn't have these memory lapses! Put the fork down or you'll gain weight again. And you really don't need it,” she reproached me with the same stern tone as my mother. In the past, I had tried to stop them from making such remarks to me, especially in front of other people, but I had realized over time that I couldn't do it because keeping me from gaining more weight was a source of pride for them. It was better to be humiliated than to suffer the guilt of watching me stuff myself without saying a word.

       I thought differently, but that was my problem.

      “ - It's only a piece of cake, not a lump of butter! Alice interjected, leaving me speechless. No one ever dared contradict my sister or mother when it came to calories or body mass index.

       - There will be cake again tonight... That's why I was saying it, Ava stammered, struggling with Alice's murderous stare, before taking her leave and running off.

       - Why didn't you tell us it's your birthday party tonight? asked Kira cautiously, even though I knew she was hurt.

       - It's just nonsense with my family. We celebrate both my birthday and Sandy's, who turns five tomorrow. Today afternoon, my mom threw a mega party for her, with all her kindergarten friends and girlfriends. But tonight, there will be a cocktail party just for close friends.

       - Do you have any other friends?

       - Not mine. My family's.

       - What about your birthday party?

       - In theory, it's tonight, but I already know that the star is still Sandy. The real party is this one. With you.

       - We would have planned something even bigger, if only you'd let us.

       - No, please. I hate parties and I hate being the center of attention! I was immediately frightened.

       - Why didn't you invite us tonight? suddenly asked Alice who had been silent.

       - I... I... I don't want to lose you.”

       I couldn't finish my sentence and before I could stop myself, I found myself hiding my face in my hands.

      “ - What's wrong? asked Kira worriedly, rushing to take me in her thin arms, which would drive my parents crazy.

       - I don't want to lose your friendship, I managed to say between sobs.

       - Why are you afraid of that happening?

       - Because I know my family and I know how good they are at making people wonder at drawing them into their glittering world, to which I have no access.

       - But what are you talking about?

       - Come to my parents' house tonight and you'll understand.” I capitulated, wondering if it wasn't better to find out right away how strong our friendship was.

      2

      

       FELICITY

      “ I understood this was a birthday party, not a beauty pageant,” Alice whispered to me as my mother

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