LITMIR.BIZ

       CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

      Nicky grabbed his bag and headed down the stairs of the Donaldson house. It was still dark outside but that suited him; he didn’t want anyone seeing him.

      The conversation he’d had with Maggie the other day had sat heavily on his mind. When she’d walked out of the room he knew he couldn’t be part of Gina trying to destroy his sister’s life. At the same time, he wasn’t stupid enough to hang around and wait for the line of people to catch up with him who’d be just as happy to get paid in his blood as they were the money he owed them.

      He’d got himself into this mess and now he needed to get out of it, or rather he needed to run the fuck away from it. He wasn’t a hero. He certainly wasn’t going to start to be one now. The thought of leaving Soho had frightened him however and he wasn’t sure how he’d be able to go and leave everything he knew behind, even though it seemed he had no choice.

      He’d never been on his own and as much as his family were hardly the Von Trapps, they were all he’d ever known. He’d never done anything for himself. Hell, he’d never even boiled a bleedin’ kettle and the more he’d thought about leaving, the more terrified he’d become. That was until he’d run into Saucers the other night. Then things had taken an unexpected turn.

      He’d known Saucers before she’d started to work in the Taylor’s clubs, when she’d first moved to the area.

      He’d first seen her knocking about in Soho just over four years ago, when he’d been eighteen. For a while she’d only acknowledged him with a smile or a wave as he walked past the street corner she was working on. Then one day she’d come up to him sporting a black eye, asking him if he knew where she could get a job.

      She’d been fed up of working the streets and she didn’t want to have any run-ins with the pimps in Soho, but then she didn’t want a pimp either, making it impossible to avoid trouble. The black eye had been a warning from one of the regular pimps who hadn’t taken kindly to her working his turf without permission.

      Nicky had liked Saucers straight away. She’d made him laugh with her grab-them-by-the-balls attitude to life. Even though she was only three years older than him, she seemed so more worldly wise.

      She was well-read, which he’d found strange. Most of her childhood had been spent in care and she’d never really had an education. Yet in between turning tricks, she’d take herself down the library, to take out books which were so thick and dusty the only thing he thought they were good for were doorstops. Nicky had never met anyone who read books for no other reason than they loved to.

      A couple of summers ago Saucers had even signed herself up for some sort of literature classes at the City Lit in Stukeley Street. It’d been the first time he’d seen her vulnerability. Gone was the funny, confident hooker who had an opinion about everything, and in her place stood an insecure woman unsure if she belonged amongst the educated of society.

      She’d asked him to wait outside for her, confident only in her ability to learn, but not in who and what she was. He’d gone along with her each week, sitting in the bar opposite until her class was over when she’d come out filled with excitement. She’d made him laugh. She devoured books in much the same way he devoured cocaine. Hungrily.

      When she’d asked him about jobs he’d said he’d put his ear to the ground and had gone to find Maggie, asking her to pull in a favour from Johnny to get Saucers a job in one of his clubs.

      When Johnny had met her it was obvious she was a natural. Saucers wasn’t any beauty but her easy manner and willingness to do most things had the punters pecking out of her hand. Saucers had been so grateful to him that she’d offered everything from her body to having a threesome with her and her friends, but Nicky hadn’t taken any of it. He’d just been pleased to help and it’d been good to find someone apart from Maggie who he could trust. All he’d wanted was her friendship.

      They’d stayed good friends ever since; best friends almost. And when Saucers had seen him looking despondent the other night after he’d heard Johnny and Gina talking, she’d tottered over to talk to him, as always landing a kiss on his cheek. ‘Alright, baby. Haven’t seen you for a couple of days. I miss you, what’s been going on darlin’?’

      ‘I’ve just been busy man.’

      ‘Busy with that flipping white stuff. It’s no good for you, Nicky. Bleeding hell. You’re a shadow of your old self.’

      ‘Remind me to come to you when I want cheering up.’

      ‘It’s not that, Nick. I’m worried about you. Everyone is and I hear Johnny was baying for you. He’s really pissed off, Nicky.’

      ‘Johnny and all the rest of them.’

      ‘Wanna talk about it?’

      ‘Talking’s not going to sort things out is it, Saucers? If you don’t mind I’ll keep it to myself.’

      ‘Okay, babe. I’m not one to squeeze secrets out of a man but I’m here if you want to gab. I still owe you one for sorting out that job with Johnny right back when, so if there’s anything I can do to help. You know I will.’

      Nicky had looked at her. An idea forming in his head. ‘Actually, now you come to mention it, perhaps there is.’

      Now, opening the back door quietly, Nicky sneaked out of the Donaldson household and breathed in the air. Suddenly he felt a sense of freedom. A freedom he’d never felt before. As much as trouble seemed to be standing on every corner for him – and he owed people more than he could possibly pay back – it actually felt good to be leaving the house behind. The house he’d spent all his miserable life in.

      The stairwell stank of every kind of bodily fluid, but Nicky didn’t notice. He was used to drug dens and crack houses, where he’d seen and smelt worse. He’d seen babies lying on filthy mattresses in soiled nappies. Young children wandering around hungry and dirty whilst their parents and hangers-on smoked crack in the same room.

      The flat at the top of the stairs was number twenty-eight and Nicky knocked on it loudly. After a couple of minutes the door was answered.

      ‘Hey baby, good to see you.’

      ‘Not as much as I am to see you. Thanks again for this.’

      Nicky grinned at Saucers who let him in. As she watched him walk into the front room every part of her body knew that letting Nicky Donaldson – the biggest but sweetest drug head since the dawn of time – stay with her was going to be the worst mistake she’d ever made.