LITMIR.BIZ

       INTRODUCTORY BIT

       Is this it?

       THAT UNCERTAIN FEELING

      Years ago, I realized that the job I was in was no longer for me. I had this itch that I couldn’t scratch. For months I couldn’t work out what it was – all I knew was that it was unsettling and as the itch increased so did my dissatisfaction. My discontent wasn’t specific, more of a feeling that something wasn’t quite right. In fact it amounted almost to a feeling of emptiness.

      Stuck is a feeling – never a reality

      I tried everything. I worked harder, I went on holiday. I chatted to friends about it, I pondered long and hard. I drank more beer, I drank less beer. I got fit, I read books. No matter what I tried, the itch just grew steadily stronger until I could no longer ignore it. It was a message telling me that it was time for a change, a time to take the next step, the next challenge. I felt it in every cell.

      The only problem was that I had absolutely no idea what to do. I had no concept of what I was capable of or how to work out what my opportunities and potential choices were. It was an incredibly frustrating feeling. I felt like there was a huge wave building beneath me but I was unable to catch it, unable to use its power. I actually felt a bit scared.

      After graduating I joined Bass Brewers as a shiny, fresh management trainee. I was excited and ambitious and soon found myself running a sales territory in the Midlands. I was learning the ropes by selling beer to working men’s clubs at a time when deals were closed more by personal relationships than business savvy. What an education. Soon I could sup mild and smoke Embassy’s with the best of them. I managed to escape the boot-full of beer mats by convincing the marketing director that I understood brands and that my talents would be best spent growing the Tennents equity. Things were going great. My lucky break came when I moved onto Carling Black Label – Britain’s largest FMCG (Fast Moving Consumer Goods) brand. It was the time of those bouncing towel ads and sponsoring the football Premiership. Big budgets, lots of great agencies to play with and learning loads. We even won ‘Brand of the Year’. My master plan was running like clockwork.

      When I got promoted to the Grolsch brand, there was no stopping me. The expense account got bigger, my suits looked better and I could now control my own destiny. The fast-track future was mine. And yet something was missing. The years rolling out in front of me all looked the same, just with a bigger car.

      Out of desperation I went to the Human Resources Director because I figured his department did all that succession planning, career advice and all the good people stuff; and if ever there was a people issue, I was it! I explained that I loved the business but couldn’t continue doing what I was doing. He was stumped. In his mind, being on the fast-track programme and running a massive, sexy brand should be a dream to anyone of my age (an ancient 27!).

      So there I was. I had played by the rules and followed the system: O levels, A levels, degree, first job, then the first decent job I wanted. I had proved myself, learnt a discipline, got a value on the transfer market and all of a sudden I was asking: ‘What is it I want to do?’. I had no idea. All I knew was that if I stayed where I was I would be in a seemingly endless rut, with an expanding waistline and ambition ebbing from my very soul.

      I had to go and look for an answer and I knew that I wouldn’t find it where I was; so I decided to search the world for inspiration. I threw in my job and jumped on a plane to see what was out there.

      The act of travelling and not having the safety net of an income turned out to be instrumental in generating new thinking. Firstly, it created FRESHNESS. I was going to places I had never been to before. I was enjoying experiences that helped stimulate and energize me. I also created some movement in my life. I knew that I wouldn’t return until I was excited enough to do so, until I knew what I really wanted to do. I had invested in this decision – the cost of a good job, travel money, relationships put on hold or at best being tickled from a distance. I had time, space and focus. The conditions were perfect for a big explore; a no-holds barred wrestle with my future.